I (22F) is babysitting for a regular client of mine. She has 3 children ages 5, 7, and 13. She asked me if I could watch the kids until 5:30pm. I texted her at 5pm asking if I should make the kids dinner because they were hungry or if she had dinner plans but I didn’t get a reply. Texted again at 6:30pm asking if everything is okay and still no reply. It is now 7pm and I have tried calling with no response.
Obviously I’m not just going to leave these children but I did have other plans tonight that I’m going to have to cancel. I’m more just worried for her safety and if she got into a car accident or something horrible?? This isn’t like her at all and the latest she’s ever been was 30 minutes. What should I do?
Update: she ended up getting heat stroke!!! I made the kids dinner and am getting them ready for bed until the grandma can come relieve me. Thank you all for the advice!! I didn’t have any emergency contacts but was able to get ahold of her work and they let me know what happened. Once she is feeling better I will talk to her about getting some emergency contacts.
Update #2: I’m officially relieved and paid for my time plus some. She is apologizing profusely for the whole situation and I assured her that all is well and I’m just glad she’s okay
Comments
You are right to be concerned keep the kids safe and try reaching her emergency contacts and if you still ca not reach her soon consider contacting the authorities
Call a family member or emergency contact you have for her. If no one answers and it’s getting late, call non-emergency police for a welfare check.
I agree with the other two people who responded. Fix the children a meal. Get them ready for bed and let them pick a movie to watch. While they are doing that try again to reach the mom then start calling emergency contacts and the PD. Better to be over concerned than not concerned enough.
I’d text her and say hey if I don’t hear anything by X time I’m going to call law enforcement to make sure you are okay and not in the hospital. I need to leave by Y time so if you are not back I’ll have to make sure that someone is here who can know what to do next. I hope you are okay.
Call an Emergency contact for her?
Do you have any numbers of family members or emergency contacts? Is there a way you can make a call away from the little ones?
If not, call non-emergency and ask for their advice.
Also: I’m sure you’ve already done this, but if not: Make them dinner and act like everything is fine during bedtime. If you’re able to stay the night even if police has been called (unless another family member or someone they know can come), that’s what I would plan on as well.
Hopefully everything is okay with the mom!
Make sure you get another POC going forward if you ever watch them again
You could contact the police to find out about any local car accidents. You could also ask the 13 year old for the phone number of a close family member that you could reach out to as you’re concerned seeing she’s not responding to your messages and she’s late returning home.
Agree with everyone saying to contact someone— hopefully you have an emergency contact. This person, if family, will likely carry out the process of calling and checking with the police and hospitals. If you can’t get a hold of anyone, you’ll need to do this yourself.
Also agree with comments saying don’t make the children aware of this. Take care of them as best you can and for as long as you’re able to. Hopefully you have a contact who can take over.
Does she have any emergency contacts written down?
Update me
Have you heard from her yet?
Feed the kids, call a guardian/family member, contact nonemergency line and perform welfare check on her phone number as she is now NC for x hours after expected return. If something did occur they’ll trace her phone and find her, if she’s ignoring you for more outing time, they find her and embarrass the hell out of her. Lesson learned
OP, if she has neighbors that she’s close with, you could try asking one of them if they know of an emergency contact (if you don’t already have that info).
Not sure how well you know the family and the dynamics, but it may be a good idea to do some story swapping time with the kids. Ask them to tell you a story about the last time they saw their X (name a specific relative: dad, grandma, auntie, etc). During the story, ask natural questions (who all was there? Is that a tradition or was that a new thing you did? Etc). Then you tell them one about yours. It’ll give you an idea for how involved extended family is, how close they are, etc. If there’s been an accident or other emergency, this info might be important to have and pass on to police or social workers if they get involved.
Hope all is well with the mom.
She needs another point of contact in case she’s unreachable. You could be having an emergency. I would refuse to watch without an idea what she expects you to do. She could have you order something.
Definitely feed the kids. It does not have to be anything big. You can give them a bowl of cereal, a sandwich, or something else super easy. I’d also be calling either a family meme beer of emergency survives at this point.
I hope you are not answering because she showed up.
Feed the kids.
Text mom the deadline Text.
Breathe deep.
Text a friend or family member of yours who might know what to do next.
And wait.
Hope it all works out.
Updateme
The 13 year old may have a number of a helpful adult. Perhaps pull her aside and explain you have to leave early and you need someone to call? Or you have a question you need another adult’s help with. Something not alarming in the slightest.
If you haven’t heard then for sure call an emergency contact or police. That’s so strange. Maybe even call wheee she was supposed to be…work, the store etc
Hoping the time just slipped and she’s fine! Please keep us updated
Be prepared for the possibility that she returns late without addressing the issue and/or being mad that you tried to reach her and called for help out of concern that she wasnt responsing.
If she was not in a true emergency situation then she was disrespecting your time and wont want to face accountability for that. She was just hoping she could disregard your boundaries.
Be firm that you expect her to be reachable while you care for her kids and this was not okay. And then dont babysit for her again. This behavior is a choice (speaking from experience), and she will make it again.
Updateme
!updateme
Call any family members she gave contact information to and then the police. It’s been hours past the time she said.
update ???
My stepmother used to do this to my little brother all the time. And she was a horrible gambling Addict and it got to the Point where nobody would watch him anymore because of it it.
Hope she has made it home safely and that’s why you haven’t updated
Updateme
Feed them and keep trying to call and text the mom. Call the police anyway because it’s better to be over cautious when it comes to this.
Please don’t leave those children alone. I would give her the benefit of the doubt in case something happened. If it turns out that she disrespected you and your time, I would never watch her kids again
There is some great advice on here. I hope she is ok. Please update us.
Updateme
Hey OP. When I worked in emergency services, it was incredibly common for police to watch after kids where the parent was arrested or sent to hospital, until atleast a gaurdian was able to attend.
Call the police. If the parent comes by before the officer does, call and cancel the officer.
Update?
Update me
Heat stroke? That’s a new one. I’ve had heat stroke a few times and I can’t imagine a situation in which it prevented me from contacting the person watching my children for more than two hours…
Hope everything is ok??
Way to go.
Good job!
You stayed cool under pressure and helped those kids.
Good that everything worked out but now you know to have clients fill out a form with emergency contacts with signed permission to contact them if clients don’t return texts or calls after the time.
glad she’s safe, but yeah u def need those emergency contacts for next time
You’re a good person
So glad she is ok and so glad you did the right thing!
Good job by the way!
You seem like a fantastic human good job!
Heat stroke?! Yikes! That sounds like some kind of delivery person job. Hail Hydrate and help them by pointing to the signs of heat exhaustion especially feeling dizzy / sleepy. They should immediately get somewhere cool. Find a gas station and ask to sit in the cooler for a bit.
Glad that everything is alright 😊
Thank you for the Update. I’m glad she is ok
Remember your paid by the hour so charge her