Nothing about being an adult feels worthwhile. I’m 18 and the dread I feel for the future is immense, even for university. Work a job you most likely will hate just to earn enough to live and then eventually die? I cannot imagine anything more bleak. Nothing about it appeals to me. I don’t want children. I have no particular hobbies or interests i’m notably good enough at/ passionate enough to pursue. When I think of the future I just see grey & it’s starting to get to me a lot. I have no desire to keep going once i reach post uni. It all feels very bleak. Most people are excited for the ‘freedom’ but i know that doesn’t exist lol. Is anyone able to give me one reason to look forward to it, i am desperate
I have no desire to experience adulthood
r/Advice
Comments
Sure. You are in your head. For you to look out the window, turn on the tv or open a book find nothing that appeals to you sounds more like clinical depression than a deep world view. Sometimes, even if it hurts your soul, admitting to yourself that perhaps your thoughts don’t make the best sense sometimes can help pull you out of these spirals. That’s not to invalidate, but to change you have to cast aside your old manner of thought. Though, if you’re unwilling to be open and try something else, you are probably correct in that you won’t evolve. Why would you if you weren’t moving?
you may need to seek professional help from a therapist.
And then, life is what YOU make it. If you don’t see a future it’s because you’re not seeing goals. Life isn’t about working, but working is what helps provide your life. If you’re “working” doing something you love, it doesn’t feel like work. Trust me, those jobs exist. I’ve been doing my job for 18 years and I look forward to it’s easy parts but it’s challenges are what keep me going. I’m never bored.
Hobbies are something you have to pursue. If you don’t try new things, you may not know what you’re missing.
Lastly. It has been proven that exercise especially outside (so a walk through a park) can ease the symptoms of emotional instability.
Hello Peter Pan!
I feel you fellow redditor. As a 25 year old who at 18 fell into depressive hiding out of these exact thoughts, I get you.
Therapy as the other comments suggest would be beneficial and takes a lot of work on your part.
I would also suggest using your lack of hobbies as an open door to explore and find yourself. Go to a class that sounds somewhat interesting, challenge yourself to try something or get good at a skill.
Plus this gives you a way to socialize and meet people that doesn’t send you into a social cutoff.
Rest assured, no one knows what they’re doing at our age, and you don’t need everything figured out.
I found setting myself short goals, a year down the line, kept things light enough to pursue without it feeling overwhelming. Eventually, other things come along, a partner, new friends or opportunities that begin to steer your life. You just need to get the ball rolling then the worth comes later.
Just keep pushing. Make a plan and even start while you’re at uni to make the transition easy.
Get therapy. Make goals, everything else follows and you will feel things get better.
DM’s are open if you ever need to chat my friend!
You could try not growing up and be in perpetual adolescence but let me tell you that isn’t fun either.
Lots of jobs are actually pretty chill all things considered. I don’t hate my job in the slightest since I have good bosses and they reward us well for our work, I don’t stress at work either in my field.
I agree with you that working just to survive is a pretty poor layout of our societies. Imo, working should be what enables us to thrive not just survive.
For that reason, I support progressive political candidates that would try to implement a Universal Basic Income. Since that would help make it so our basic needs are met outside of work and make it so that work helps us afford the many wants we have in life like better cars, bigger houses, vacations, etc.
At 18 I wouldn’t worry about kids or things like that, building a life for yourself is what is important.
When I was 18 I was in a similar position where there was not a ton of hobbies or interests I felt good enough to pursue. My advice to you would be to consider taking classes in business, philosophy, and the political sciences. I ended up eventually landing on the business route after many years of trial and error trying to find what might feel right to me, but I would have been happy doing either philosophy or political science as my major/career route.
Life is about more than work at the end of the day. I feel it’s about the people you meet and the experiences you share together. College is a great environment to make some life-long friends if anything. It’s a good opportunity to start learning and improving on your routines. I suggest taking things day by day as they come, looking ahead some helps but I would encourage you to be present in the current moment when you’re with your friends.
A recent lesson I learned was that it’s okay to embrace things not always being okay. By that I mean look for ways to express yourself in a healthy manner when you feel tired or frustrated, this can be through the arts, recreational sports, exercise, or even just journaling. I wish I did more of these things back when I was in college because I feel it helps a lot getting to express myself.
Best of luck!
You are in an interesting time of life. The unspoken unsure part. Where you havent dipped feet into the real world yet. You haven’t found yourself yet.
You may have depression talk to someone. I mean it. After that one step at a time. You will soon bloom into the person you are ment to be.
you can do adulthood in any way you want. hang in there