So I live with my mom and two brothers on section 8 housing. Around June of 2022 I got a new job that made me about 19 dollars an hour so naturally the portion of rent that we needed to pay increased. The set up that we had was that me and my brothers pay for all of the other bills and my mom pays rent. When she saw that the rent went up she just, stopped paying rent. Didn’t tell anyone that she stopped, didn’t ask us to start helping her with rent, just stopped paying it and didn’t say anything. We found out about this in December of 2024 after a year and a half of the landlord trying to get payments out of my mom. If it wasn’t for the landlord being kind we would be homeless already. I struck up a deal with him that we would pay him every week so we can pay off the debt but 10 months later is telling us that it’s not enough for him, that what we are giving is only a portion of what the unit goes for and that he wants us gone by the end of the week or he is calling the sheriff to get us out. Tomorrow I’m going to call him and offer him some money that my friend gave me (2000) to allow us to stay one more month so we can get a storage unit and look for a shelter. I cant believe I’m going to be homeless because of what my mom did and this entire time she hasn’t been working and hasn’t so much as apologized. She’s just been acting like this is “gods plan” and that this situation was out of her control. I’m so upset I don’t know what to do.
I’m 24 years old and live in NYC, rent is so high here, we had a perfect arrangement and she just ruined it… I think I’m going to finally bite the bullet and cut my family off after this. They are looking for family friends to let them live with them for a while or go to a family shelter but I don’t want to go, I want to never see any of them ever again
Additionally context- because of the extremely non payment we lost our section 8 and we were denied it again upon reapplying.
Added context- I mention cutting off my entire family because they are all like this. They have abused me in pretty much every which way since a child that wasn’t sexually. To this day they are all incredibly immature, unstable, angry and bigoted and being around them has always brought me nothing but unrest and pain. So I am going to use this situation to be free of it all. Thank you guys for all of the support
Comments
I think you’re justified in that choice. Look for a room to rent — not an apartment. Just a room. Start small and try to save a bit and look for a job that pays more. You may need to leave NYC.
Where in NYC
my advice is to know how much your mom sucks (the rest I cant tell but yeah your mom sucks) but still keep in contact when you separate. if you live on your own you’ll be better off. imo lots of people like your mom are just (please forgive me) plain dumb and innately I pity them but dont let her drag you down. youre likely most responsible so cutting them out of your life is too harsh imo. she failed to be responsible with gods children (I mean that. it bothers me when people talk about god but fail gods children. youre not her child. youre god’s) but anyways youre there. dont let your mom decide your opinion on the family cuz she failed them as much as you – you may just have a little extra that leads you to being more responsible. I suggest you use it esp if you believe in god too
Do coolworks.com it helps have housing while working and you get the explore the U.S
Go on Facebook marketplace and search rooms for rent you should definitely find something.
Would you consider living in a vehicle? People do it quite comfortably and by choice.
If you would, go on YouTube and look for a channel called cheapRVliving. On that page, look for a video a couple years ago titled something very close to “You were just evicted. Now what?”
He walks you through everything, one step at a time.
I’m so sorry you’re in this position. Do know that you still have rights, even after extreme nonpayment of rent. He can’t make you leave in a week, even if he calls the sheriff, if he hasn’t followed proper eviction procedures. Contact Legal Aid or a similar tenant’s rights org and get some advice. Make him file an official eviction procedure— that will take at least 30 days. Get yourself as much time as you can to save money.
You need to leave NYC. It is expensive and unless you have something good planned for the future or a clear vision for the future. Then your pretty much looking at a hopeless shitty life.
Might want to do some research. Of course you can always go back to NYC but temporarily I think leaving would help. For me personally I live in Cleveland. There are a lot more opportunities then there used to be here. And the cost of living is pretty low in some areas.
You don’t have to worry about gangs or violence that much as long as you know where not to go. You can honestly just ask someone though. It’s pretty well known that there are very very specific areas you never go or you may not come back out here. this is the sort of research you’ll have to be doing when you look for your new location.
Hopefully this helps.
An example of the opportunitys here. Your 24? So here they have programs for 18-24 year olds to set them up on a good career path with no degree. One example is being a pharmacy technician. It’s a pretty easy job. You get to sit on your ass most of the day and not do shit. And you get paid 23$-28$ dollars a hour. I took this program (and anyone can get in yes) and they paid me $500 to take a 3 week training course. And they basically have connects through networking to get you the job easier. So I got a job paying 26$ a hr while paying $560 a month for my apartment.
Don’t they need to give you 30 days notice
Look up affordable housing NYC. Most places have non profits that help prevent homelessness! You don’t have to bring your family (honestly, if I was in your shoes I definitely would not). I live in Memphis and have worked with programs here for patients that don’t have stable housing. There are a lot more resources than people realize.
Try gaol. Three meals a day and no rent
NYC has very strong tenant protections – he can’t get you out in a week. He has to go through the eviction process which takes quite a bit to do.
I agree – it’s time to step far away from Mom.
This will make you feel better..
Laid off Jan 2025 after almost 20 years ( 42 years old ) I have started from the bottom and went to top.
Cincinnati apt lease ended July 1
Came to NE Florida July 15 2025 with $4000 left over in my acount from the severance I got in Jan
I came to FL to do a part time teacher 2days week at Flagler ( I have my MBA , so I can be an adjunct professor) . Anyway- the month of August starting the 4th was guaranteed to be paid – I chose to come early to get acclimated with the town ..
So I paid $100 night for a hotel from July 15 – Aug 3rd . ( Roughly $2000 now spent)
On August 4th … the college let me know that there wasn’t enough interest for the fall semester but there was enough interest for Spring ..:
So .., you see at 42 .., I find myself almost out of money, no job until Jan , and no free housing ..
So yea …
Now I’m looking at inns/ BB I could work at in exchange for a plae to stay
Wish you the best
Here in Florida it’s illegal for homeless people to sleep in public places and no panhandling..
Well why don’t you guys just move into another section 8 housing? And 2k might be enough to find another place for yourself. Good luck.
Have you considered going into the military ? Or go into truck driving. If you go into truck driving, your state employment agency might pay for your training. You want to go Over The Road (OTR) so you can live in your truck what ever you do try to NOT have the company you signed up with pay for your training.
You can not be evicted without having a court date and seeing a judge. That is a veryyy lengthy process too. He can’t just “call the sheriff and have you kicked out”.
I would advise you to contact these folks and see what they can do. Sometimes they will even pay all your back rent for you, so you don’t get evicted. They also can refer you to other organizations that will pay your back rent. Seriously, follow up with these people first thing on Monday Landlord/Tenant Help
Best of luck to you. 🙂
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Why proclaim that you will be homeless? Why not proclaim that you won’t? Thoughts lead to actions.
I work in NYC and live in Westchester. I tell people to live in the city you need all the money or no money. It’s a strange dynamic
May want to hang on to that $2000 until you know what he can legally do. You may need it.
Take the 2 racks out a down payment on a an affordable car and leave the state. It’s so much easier in other areas. Midwest or down south. You’ll be living good in 6 months.
Belive it or not, he can’t just make them kick you out next week. He has to file a legal eviction. Which usually gives the tenants 30 days. Do not give him the $2,000. Use that to try to find a room to rent.
Was your name on the lease? If not, she lost the section 8, you may still eligible
It will be hard at first but you will be better off on your own in the long run.
Thats a rough situation for sure. I recommend looking into tenants rights given NYC is very lenient on tenants. Not sure if its accurate but generally landlord needs to give you proper notice (1 month?)before eviction.
Sorry I can t imagine.going threw that.you still young.mayne can rent room or?? Good luck
Hang on, the landlord has to go through an eviction process to get rid of you. But if you can’t afford it, consider renting a room somewhere. Or get a job in another state.
Something’s missing here. She just stopped paying? she just stopped working? So she’s just been saving all the money? Did she do this to get her own place without you guys? I mean a year’s worth of rent she just stopped paying? And the landlord didn’t tell you guys until after a year? Apply for section 8 with just you or your brother. Leave the city.
My mom and dad have been irresponsible in the past, they regularly let the rent get late by 3 months because my mom likes to gamble rent money. One time they got taken to court because the rent was 6 months late. Another time when my dad was working a temporary job, he gave my mom money to pay the rent and she gambled all the money my dad gave her and also gambled her own salary. So when my dad returned from his job the rent was 3 months late.
Find a place to live, fast, for you..
Your mom needs help and wether or not she has done it the way you approve of; she has helped you a long time and loves you.
You need to get your own place and whatever you do NOT leave your mom when she needs somewhere to go. You don’t have to get a place for everyone or even suggest it. But you don’t have to lock em out either, your mom may need more help than you can provide. Start making calls, there is help, but you are going to have to ask. It will be hard, but you are still blessed. This is life.
She is your mom.
Do you still have your job? Can you afford to pay rent? Will you be denied Section 8 Housing in the future? If you moved to your own place, will mom be wanting to move in with you?
Get a cheap gym membership so you can charge your phone and shower. Bonus points you can work on your health. I’m so sorry this is happening to you.
NAL But I am a tenant rights activist in NYS and have successfully sued multiple slum lords in this state so please listen.
You live in NYC the ll can’t just kick you out. Right now the ll can’t even use that as just cause because he made a legal contract wether it’s in writing or verbal accepting payment weekly until the balance is caught up. So you know in ny you must be given a 3 day rent or quit. Which is 3 days to pay the back amount owed or the ll will file for an eviction based on nonpayment. But the ll cant legal do this because of the agreement.
If you are served a 3 day rent or quit, your grounds with the help of nycs wonderful housing courts you can get free legal help if income eligible but your argument would be you are in a contract with the ll to pay back the back amount owed weekly till caught up. And as long as your current rent is paid and you can show proof of payments the case will get dropped.
What it sounds like is the landlord wants to up the rent but can’t until the unit is vacated because of NYC rent regulations. So they are trying to scare you out with the cop threat. So until you are served a court order to go to court and a judge says you’re evicted you are safe. Your landlord can call the cops all he wants they will tell him it’s a civil matter until there is a court order otherwise requiring you out by a specific date which is determined by how long you have resided at the address ( which if a LL in NY wants you to move must give the same time frame as allowed in evictions) 1 year or less 30 days 2 to 3 years 60 days 4 years or more 90 days.
FWIW, if the sheriff is involved, he’s already gone through the court to evict your mom. That means the eviction ball started rolling several months ago. It might have even been more than a year of court battles due to the section 8 status. You can’t change it at this point. He gave your mom some time and she failed to treat you like an adult. He’s been paying court fees and lawyer fees to have you removed. He flat out told you the unit is more profitable with different tenants.
That being said, you might still have tenant rights since you are an adult and live there. So go talk to a lawyer. Like yesterday. You need time to move out before the sheriff will forcibly remove you or allow the locks to be changed.
I would enlist in the US Military. A ticket out and a chance at a fresh start. Good luck
Can you live somewhere like NJ thats less expensive. you might have to motel it up, and look for good roommates in the meantime. By good I mean reliable, non drama, wont steal your stuff, wont make a mess. Just get on a bus and leave your mom without telling her. Take a sibling if they work and can earn money.
Also, save your money. Put it towards a down payment on an apt or what not. But do not give this money to your mom to put towards rent. I repeat take your money and just leave right now. Go to a motel. Do not even talk to the landlord and humiliate yourself. If your siblings want to come with you, let them.
Has he filed for an eviction through the courts? If he has not, he cannot throw y’all out in a week. That would be an illegal eviction. If he has not, that buys you some time. Work and save your money and find a room to rent somewhere and get out as soon as you can.
Doesn’t the landlord have to legally give you a 30 days notice?
Don’t give him $2k for that!
With the $2k, pack up your stuff and get on a greyhound to Baltimore ($50). Baltimore is cool. You’d probably find a room here for as low as $700 with utilities.
Get away from your mom! I think she wants to be homeless.
Tell your landlord he needs to give you money if he wants to evict you with less than 30 days notice. He needs to give 30 days.
To anyone thinking “maybe I’ll just buy an apartment and rent it out”…… imagine being caught up in this mess
I don’t think he can all the sheriff and kick you out . He would have to take you to court and have everything documented . It sounds like you have more time than you think .
I know this is going to get down voted but it’s kinda bizarre that everyone is villiainizing the landlord and trying to get the OP/tenant to break every rule possible in order to keep living rent free.
Especially from even OP’s words, the landlord was nothing but patient and considerate and super lenient but yet he and you guys still thinks it’s okay to take advantage of the landlord.
The landlord did nothing wrong, went the extra MILES to help out when irresponsible people won’t face consequences for their actions.
What did mom do with the money that was supposed to go to rent?
Just move like yesterday
I’m really sorry you’re in this spot. First, do not self-evict; in NYC only Housing Court can remove you. Call 311 today and ask for the Tenant Helpline or Right to Counsel, and reach out to a Homebase office for eviction-prevention help and to apply for an emergency One Shot Deal through ACCESS HRA to cover arrears. Do not hand over the $2,000 unless a tenant attorney confirms it protects you in a written stipulation. Document every payment and message, and if the landlord threatens a lockout call 911 and report an illegal eviction. Ask about CityFHEPS or other rent help, line up a backup plan like shelter intake or a trusted friend while you work this, and once you’re safe it’s okay to set firm boundaries with your family.
I’d take your friends 2k and try and find a roommate situation or room for yourself. I’m sorry this happened. My mom hart hurts for you.
Shitty mom dude, sounds like you be better off solo