My daughter (8month) is on medication that needs to be timed 10 hours apart. Her doctor told us it needs to be given by 7am. The other morning my husband gave it to her at 8am while I was at work. Yesterday I spoke to him about it and explained again it needs to be given by 7am per the doctor. He is a heavy sleeper. This has been an issue. He sleeps through alarms. Now he has his alarm clock away from him so he has to get out of bed to shut it off. I leave for work before he and my daughter wake up.
This morning I texted him at 6:30 no response.
6:40 no response. Called him a bunch of times. 7;15am I call my mom who drives over there to make sure everything is ok. He was finally up at 7:30am and did not yet give her her medication it seemed like he just went into her room to go get her as she was still in her sleep sack.
My daughter is pretty quiet in the morning and it’s probably the case that she was up since 6:30 and was just quiet in her crib (which is fine for 5-10 min or so but not a whole hour of her sitting there while he’s sleeping). She never sleeps past 6. The latest is 6:15. So it’s even possible she was up since 6am until he got her at 7:30am.
He is annoyed now because he thinks everything was fine and it’s not a big deal and why did I have to send my mom over there.
How do I fix this? I work an hour away and can’t simply come home. I leave before they wake up. Unless I wake him when I leave and he’s not allowed to fall back to sleep. How do I explain to him that this is a huge issue when he just doesn’t think it is.
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Two questions:
Does he actually understand the importance of giving the meds at the right time? Was he there when the Dr. explained everything? If not, and if you have a follow up appt, can he go with you to listen to the Dr explain everything?
How does he get up for work or anything else important? I know he has trouble getting awake, but does he make it on time for other events/important deadlines? If this is a repeating pattern, it needs to be addressed more broadly than this one incident (I know this is an important incident with the meds, I just mean there may be more to it).
If the medicine has to be 10 hours apart, I’m not understanding the 7 AM urgency. You can make the night one later so that it can be later for the medicine. I’d ask the doctor why 7 AM.
I think the main problem is heavy sleep. I’m also a mom of 3 months old and I feel even when my husband does a small mistake when it comes to the baby I react heavily. So I understand you totally. However from my point of view your problem is not a big deal. You should focus on searching better alarms etc which definitely wake him up.
This is a husband problem. He doesn’t care. You can’t force him to care. Start dropping the baby off with your mom in the morning and looking for a place of your own. Life will be easier with only one baby to deal with.
It sounds like you’re shouldering way more than your share… and it’s really fair to feel exasperated when routines fall apart. Maybe have him get up and turn the alarm off physically, so he can’t snooze through it again? What if you two worked out a plan together, even for just five minutes, to align on this stuff… and how might that shift things?
He might be a candidate for one of those alarms that shakes the bed. See if you can find one that can be controlled by a phone app and have it on your phone.