Hello! I’m a man in my late-20s. I would like to know if any men around my age or older have any bits of advice with regards to life as I get closer and then cross the threshold into 30. Anything I should look out for? Any tips for navigating life from here on out? Any habits I should cultivate?
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I’ve been your age obviously, I’ll chip in a couple of thoughts fwiw:
Looking back, 30 doesn’t seem like it was a major threshold, but it felt more that way at the time. At 30, you’re entering a stage in your life where you should be more settled into what you plan to spend the rest of your career doing. If you’re still floundering around deciding what kind of work you want to do or contemplating more education or a career change, you’re really running late to be doing that. At some age, employers won’t hire you for entry-level jobs. Age 30 seems like your getting to that point.
Your finances should also be getting settled as well. You should be contributing to your retirement plan at work. It’s best to contribute the maximum allowed by law. At a minimum, contribute enough to maximize the employer match, if you have one. Put the retirement account aside and forget it’s there. You should also be saving money beyond your retirement account. Save up for a down payment on a home. Try to avoid borrowing money other than a home mortgage.
If you are married, it is a good age to start having children if you haven’t already. I waited until I was 35 to get started and until 50 until I was done. That was not smart and I wish I hadn’t had kids after my early 40s.
Lastly, look around and enjoy. Talk to your parents and other older relatives if you’re fortunate enough to have them in your life. Get their advice on a few things. If you’re still partying with your buddies at the bar or taking boys’ weekend trips, it’s probably time to stop doing that.
Start paying more attention to what you are eating and try to get exercise. I strongly recommend you take a spoonful of fiber in a glass of water before you go to bed. It will probably spare you a lot of pain and permanent damage to your colon that you won’t know about until it’s too late.
I would like to maybe push back what u/Routine_Mine_3019 has said. I say this all with respect, he’s a guy in his mid 60’s who’s idea of a 30 year old was probably from when there was the greatest economic boom in recent western history. I agree in theory with some of what he’s said, but when many 30 year olds today have great difficulty “settling their finances” as rent can be 70% of your wage it feels like an ignorant statement.
I feel like he is speaking to who he was at 30, with a snapshot of the world when he was 30, not what a 30 year old is exposed to today. Many of which cannot AFFORD to move out of their parents place.
And his comment about not having any boys weekends and you should probably stop… rubbish..
I’m 36. Wife, 2 kids, house.
Life weights eat well. I’m fairly fit and have done weight training/cycled for a while but since turning 30 I’ve felt the need to focus far more on my diet and workouts. Maintaining muscle mass and reducing body fat is so much more important in mid life. Also if you are planning to have kids, they blow a huge hole in your time/sleep so keeping fit and active is SO much harder. My two are 3 and 6 and it’s starting to get easier.
Invest. I only started investing a few years ago but getting some regular amount into a tax efficient account (ISA in the UK) makes a huge difference for my future.
Review pensions. Again I only recently started looking at this but it creates a sense of direction and helps you frame your finances.
Spend on what you love. Yes save for the future, yes invest, yes pension. But life is for living. Work out what you love and spend on that. I love coffee and cooking so great beans, grinder and cooking knives add value to my life. My children do rugby, martial arts and swimming. Book budget is unlimited.
Buy back time. We have a cleaner. It’s not cheap but it gives me and my wife so much time back with our children at the weekends.
Use that time with friends and family. My parents both died suddenly within the last 18 months at age 64. Both previously healthy. Life is fragile and fleeting.
Don’t take it for granted.
Run!!
Save
You peak in the sexual marketplace at 35-39. Women peak ~23. Always focus on you, yes even in a marriage. Your woman will have more admiration and respect for you. If you maintain your frame.
Find a skilled hobby that you love. Do it alone. Obviously share things with interested people if they ask or whatnot or join some hobby socials but for the most part do it alone. This will be your safe place for the rest of your life. It will keep you sane, optimistic and productive.
Go to more sporting events. Do stuff you enjoy. Invest in your health.
I can only give you advice in the form of a story.
When I was in my ’20s I had a friend that was like 32 or something. And he was so sensitive about it. Whatever he viewed at the age of 30 to be in his mind wasn’t consistent with reality. He would lose his cool. He felt old. He couldn’t hide it.
On the other hand I didn’t think anything about turning 30.
And now I’m about to turn 40 and I’ve no idea what I’m doing. I got a BA, lived abroad for 10 years (2008, housing crisis), then decided I wanted to go to med school and did the prerequisites and worked as an EMT on the Mexican border during the pandemic. I’m in Vietnam now. The world is a very different place than it was when I was 30.
So my advice, no matter how misguided, is to meet as many people and have as many experiences as possible. My parents are retired now. They worked hard their whole lives so they could sit around the house all day… Don’t use your best years sitting in an office.
Beyond that, find something you love to do and get paid for it. Just wake up and do what you want and when you understand the ins and outs, try your hand at it.
But I’m broke and probably going to die before 60 the rate I’m going. So take this advice with a grain of salt. I can honestly say that I say what I want, dance when I feel like it, and approach random people everyday. And I like my life in that sense.
I’m 61, my best advice would be to “live below your means”. Pay off any debt, & then. As soon as you can make a genuine effort to invest & reinvest to use compounding. A 401K at work (with company matching if available), personal account with bank features, build up an emergency fund, a Roth IRA & a 529 plan if you choose to pay for higher education for yourself or children.
Start reading and learning, there are lots of good resources, kiplinger.com, MarketBeat.com, Gurufocus.com, 247wallst.com, theStreet.com, investopedia.com, investing.com, Streetinsider.com, & SeekingAlpha.com or Zacks.com, name a few.
Also I suggest, as you read, make a physical note of stocks or funds that interest you. Follow them. There may be a point in the future you might want more than just Index Funds or Target Date Funds..
You should start preparing for the next phase of your life. I assume you’re single and will be looking to start a family in the near future. This is the time in your life where you should be extremely focused on maximizing your buildup of marketable skills, your savings, acquiring assets, and most importantly, start studying what makes a good wife vs a good gf. Picking wrong can lead to a mental and financial disaster. Your marriage success will heavily depend on how successful you are in the multiple areas of your life: Financial, physical, health, spiritual, family, community.