AITA for yelling at my brother because he told me he didn’t want to pay his share of the Internet money. I am a university student, so I spend a lot of time at home because my uni is a two hour drive each way. I also work part time at the airport so by the end of any shift I am dead tired. My sister is in high school, and both my mum and brother work.
Today on the drive home I got a text from my brother saying that this will be the last time he pays for the internet because he does not need it and can just use his phone data. For background, I am the one who manages all the bills because neither my mum nor brother want to, and when they do, they mess things up. For example, we once ended up with a $400 gas bill. I really hate being in charge of bills because whenever payments are due everyone suddenly demands explanations or is late so I had to cover it with my own money and the hound them for it like I am so pathetic person asking for money after they’ve been irresponsible with their own money or something idk I hate it. I have worked around this by asking for the money well before due dates.
When I got home he there waiting for me and said the same thing agains is I said Ookay, I will call the internet company and cancel the internet. I said this because we all know he will still end up using it, and I do not want to cover his share just because he has decided he does not need it right now.
He then accused me of being ridiculous and asked what about everyone else. That is when I lost my temper and started yelling. My point was exactly that. He does not live alone so he does not get to opt out of shared bills whenever he feels like it. Honestly, he is so self centred that he does not notice how much Mum and I already pay for things he uses every day without contributing. He wants to wash his clothes oh there launder powder, it’s his turn to wash the dishes here is the dish soap that magically appears the kitchen. He wants to eat rice for a change ahh there’s the a new rice cooker that’s here. His milk is finished let me use the lactose free milk that’s there. And on and on it goes.
At one point he even suggested I call the company and “pause” the internet service, which is not how things work.
So, am I the asshole for yelling at him?
So if there’s bad grammar and syntax dead tired brain fired massive headache.
Comments
^^^^AUTOMOD Thanks for posting! READ THIS COMMENT – DO NOT SKIM. This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything.
AITA for yelling at my brother because he told me he didn’t want to pay his share of the Internet money. I am a university student, so I spend a lot of time at home because my uni is a two hour drive each way. I also work part time at the airport so by the end of any shift I am dead tired. My sister is in high school, and both my mum and brother work.
Today on the drive home I got a text from my brother saying that this will be the last time he pays for the internet because he does not need it and can just use his phone data. For background, I am the one who manages all the bills because neither my mum nor brother want to, and when they do, they mess things up. For example, we once ended up with a $400 gas bill. I really hate being in charge of bills because whenever payments are due everyone suddenly demands explanations or is late so I had to cover it with my own money and the hound them for it like I am so pathetic person asking for money after they’ve been irresponsible with their own money or something idk I hate it. I have worked around this by asking for the money well before due dates.
When I got home he there waiting for me and said the same thing agains is I said Ookay, I will call the internet company and cancel the internet. I said this because we all know he will still end up using it, and I do not want to cover his share just because he has decided he does not need it right now.
He then accused me of being ridiculous and asked what about everyone else. That is when I lost my temper and started yelling. My point was exactly that. He does not live alone so he does not get to opt out of shared bills whenever he feels like it. Honestly, he is so self centred that he does not notice how much Mum and I already pay for things he uses every day without contributing. He wants to wash his clothes oh there launder powder, it’s his turn to wash the dishes here is the dish soap that magically appears the kitchen. He wants to eat rice for a change ahh there’s the a new rice cooker that’s here. His milk is finished let me use the lactose free milk that’s there. And on and on it goes.
At one point he even suggested I call the company and “pause” the internet service, which is not how things work.
So, am I the asshole for yelling at him?
So if there’s bad grammar and syntax dead tired brain fired massive headache.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I yelled at my brother because he told me he didn’t want pay for his share
Help keep the sub engaging!
Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ
Subreddit Announcements
Follow the link above to learn more
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA. Your mother needs to step in & set an amount everyone equally pays. Can you change the internet password? If so, change the password & don’t give it to him.
NTA if he doesn’t need the internet change the wifi password and don’t let him ever use it if he’s unwilling to pay a share.
Yta for yelling at him. You are an adult. Absolutly no reason to yell at someone over this.
cambia password se te la chiede deve pagare…
NTA.
I hope you are able to move out as soon as possible. You’d be better off, living with roommates instead of your entitled family.
NTA. He’s a mooch. I would set things up so that he can’t use it at all. If he wants to watch Netflix once in awhile, too bad. If he was living on his own, he would have to pay full internet prices to watch Netflix even “once in a while”.
I believe you will have a router from your internet provider. Get into the settings and block his devices. if you have any streaming services, use the parental controls to put passwords on each account. He has made it very clear that he doesn’t need it. You can calmly and rationally tell him that this is how it’s going to work.
He can also buy his own laundry soap.
You may want to consider having everyone contribute to a household account that pays for shared consumables.
You have to crack down on people like this. He will take and take and bleed you dry.
NTA he can either pay his chair or change the password and do not give it to him. It may be cheaper if you’re the only one who’s using it or the only one who’s paying for it, if you just get a hotspot so that you’ll have it for when you need it. When he’s saying he will use his phone data. He is likely not realizing that the moment he steps into Wi-Fi, it is going off of Wi-Fi and not his cellular data. I suggest you call his bluff. Unplug the Internet for a day or two and see how he reacts.
NTA, but change the password and lock his access. If he doesn’t need it, he doesn’t need it.
If you do keep the internet, then go in and block his phone or devices from accessing it. People who don’t pay don’t need passwords or access. NTA.
“If you don’t need it, you won’t miss it when its gone, right? So why are you complaining?”
NTA.
Usually yelling is condemned, but you are exhausted and with today slang, it was a valid crashout.
On a side node, I’ve been in a similar situation: move out asap. You are already capable of living alone, your family is dragging you and your mental health down. You deserve better. I moved out with flatmates to save some money and I got 2 birds with a stone: cheaper and less mental taxing. Once I finish studying, I can get a better job and then move out on my own. My family wasn’t happy because they had to take care of everything on their own. Still the best decision of my life.
Good luck.
NTA. Stop paying for the internet. Stop covering when others are short on the bills. Let them feel the pain of electricity, gas, and water being shut off. I bet since he’s living at home with his mum that the utilities are in her name so it’s her credit that would be hurt by multiple non or short payments.