We recently let my 18 year old niece stay with us until her dad can get her moved. She’s been addicted to many drugs and was moving to get clean. She came here last night they said they searched her and she had nothing on her so we didn’t think to double check. She left the house today to go with another family member and our children had got into her bag. We found a used meth pipe and automatically freaked out since we have small children. We called her dad and my aunt who he was staying with. They both acted like we were over reacting for wanting to know if she had smoked in our house. My brother even threatened my husband and we’re basically blaming us for taking her in when he’s the one who asked us to. Am I crazy for thinking that it wasn’t no big deal?
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We recently let my 18 year old niece stay with us until her dad can get her moved. She’s been addicted to many drugs and was moving to get clean. She came here last night they said they searched her and she had nothing on her so we didn’t think to double check. She left the house today to go with another family member and our children had got into her bag. We found a used meth pipe and automatically freaked out since we have small children. We called her dad and my aunt who he was staying with. They both acted like we were over reacting for wanting to know if she had smoked in our house. My brother even threatened my husband and we’re basically blaming us for taking her in when he’s the one who asked us to. Am I crazy for thinking that it wasn’t no big deal?
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I mean yes obviously she did meth in your house
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> Action is me contacting my brother and family about it and freaking out about her having that in our house. I think it might make me an asshole because we might have made it a bigger deal than we should have. We probably could have handled it more calmly.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
Your niece needs to be in an official recovery program with full security, not with you.
NTA
Kick her out immediately. Let the other family members deal with her. You need to protect your kids.
ESH: You knew in advance that she was a drug addict. I don’t know why you are so surprised she had drug paraphernalia in her possession. You were negligent to bring her around your children without properly checking.
Obviously, she shouldn’t have bought it into your home, but I am not sure what else you would expect from a teenage drug addict.
She’s a drug addicted teenager. What did you expect?
Going through her stuff makes you jerks.
Letting your kids go through her stuff, and then being mad about what they got into and blaming her makes you TAH
People need acceptance and forgiveness and most importantly RESPECT in order to want to change.
ESH. You knew what would happen bringing a drug addict into your home. She’s a drug addict it’s not something to take lightly
ESH the girl needs professional help for addiction not to be bounced around family members who are unprepared for the scope of this.