I live in London with two friends in an old pub convert, that has a large basement space and two upstairs bedrooms. Jason (not real name) lives stays in one of the upstairs rooms, and I live in the other. Isaac (not real name) lives in the basement, which is huge as it used to be a pub cellar, and is the size of the entire upstairs.
I work from an office 3 days per week, and work 2 days either in my room or a cafe from my laptop. Jason works in hospitality so isn’t here much. Isaac used to be office based, but decided to quit his job about 6 months ago and go into consulting, which means he works from home constantly, but has basically set up an office in our front room, where our TV and sofas are – basically where we chill. At the beginning this didn’t bother me much, but now he takes calls all the time, with his camera on which means I basically can’t use the room when he’s in there. I’ve asked him to stop taking calls upstairs, and he flipped out saying he can’t be expected to work in a basement with no windows (despite this being what he pays for. We all pay the same rent btw, and I have the smallest room). He now has a desk set up in our front room, and works from there till late into the night, with his back to us basically all day, only ever getting up to get take away or smoke. I feel like I’m basically living in his office, and have asked him now repeatedly to find somewhere else to work, explaining it isn’t fair he’s co-opted a space we’re all paying for especially when he has so much private space available to him. It’s now got to the stage where I’m considering asking him to move out (he isn’t on the lease) if he can’t work downstairs/anywhere else that isn’t a shared space. AITA for considering this as an option?
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I live in London with two friends in an old pub convert, that has a large basement space and two upstairs bedrooms. Jason (not real name) lives stays in one of the upstairs rooms, and I live in the other. Isaac (not real name) lives in the basement, which is huge as it used to be a pub cellar, and is the size of the entire upstairs.
I work from an office 3 days per week, and work 2 days either in my room or a cafe from my laptop. Jason works in hospitality so isn’t here much. Isaac used to be office based, but decided to quit his job about 6 months ago and go into consulting, which means he works from home constantly, but has basically set up an office in our front room, where our TV and sofas are – basically where we chill. At the beginning this didn’t bother me much, but now he takes calls all the time, with his camera on which means I basically can’t use the room when he’s in there. I’ve asked him to stop taking calls upstairs, and he flipped out saying he can’t be expected to work in a basement with no windows (despite this being what he pays for. We all pay the same rent btw, and I have the smallest room). He now has a desk set up in our front room, and works from there till late into the night, with his back to us basically all day, only ever getting up to get take away or smoke. I feel like I’m basically living in his office, and have asked him now repeatedly to find somewhere else to work, explaining it isn’t fair he’s co-opted a space we’re all paying for especially when he has so much private space available to him. It’s now got to the stage where I’m considering asking him to move out (he isn’t on the lease) if he can’t work downstairs/anywhere else that isn’t a shared space. AITA for considering this as an option?
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> AITA for asking him to find somewhere else to work so I can continue to enjoy the flat I’m renting without feeling like I live in an office?
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA. You need to claim the space. Be in there, turn on the TV, be as loud as you want and whenever he complains, say it’s a shared space and he’s free to take his calls in the basement.
NTA but would it make sense to switch rooms around?
This guy isn’t even on the lease, but he has the biggest space. And still insists on using the shared area like his personal office??
If it’s me, I’m moving some of the living space stuff into the downstairs room. When he starts complaining about being in his space, just comment “well, you’re not using it, so…”
In your case, assuming you’re not overly into THAT option, I’d give him a week to back down before you throw him out. With his name not being on the lease, you’re essentially doing him a favor. And you shouldn’t cater to a narcissist who can’t be bothered to work with you.
Stop tiptoeing around him. Check the tenancy laws to determine what type of notice you need to give him. When you figure this out, have the final discussion with him, “I’ve asked you repeatedly to respect the rest of us and take your business to your room. Will you do that? No? Okay then consider this your move out notice. You have XXX days to vacate.” NTA
He’s allowed to use the front room for work. You are also allowed to use the front room for watching TV, chatting etc.
If he can’t work whilst you’re in there, he needs to move.
> It’s now got to the stage where I’m considering asking him to move out (he isn’t on the lease)
NTA –
NTA – just make it unusable as an office. Walk around in a towel during his video calls, watch TV & have mates over – basically just go about your day as if he weren’t there. It’s a common space, you can be there too & use the lounge room to chill & watch tv. If that fails, talk to the LL (or talk to LL first). It’s very selfish of him.
NTA Time to take up loud midday hobbies and occasional nudity in your living room
NTA
He is preventing you from using your living space.
And you are all paying for his office accommodation.
NTA. He can’t expect to take over the common area as an office. Millions of people have offices without windows. I can understand not wanting to be in the same room 24/7, but he has free will. He can go to a coffee shop, as OP does. Certainly if he works beyond normal hours late into the night and expects to be able to work in that area, he is an AH. He can rent an office too. You are in London. There are probably a ton of office rental places (WeWork, Regis, etc…) We lost power one morning and the power company said it was going to last all day. I called an office rental place two miles away and set up shop there for a day. AI says a coworking space can be had for as little at 109 pounds a month. Or he can move.
NTA. It’s not clear why you’ve decided to put up with this for so long. The question is can you unilaterally, i.e., without Jason’s input, ask him to move out? The other question is what do you mean “ask” him to move out? Why would he agree if he can do exactly what he wants at this place?
Stop respecting that he’s working while there. Blare the tv, play loud reels on your phone and laugh hysterically, vacuum, walk around and be noisy. Ignore his requests to pipe down or stop.
He will figure things out.
NTA. He has the biggest area of the house. I would say you could use the communal space as if he was not there. Watch TV/DVDs, do not worry about the volume. It is shared space, not his.
if it would suit you could offer to swap bedrooms. He gets a window, you get a bigger room.
If he insists on using a shared area for his work every day then he needs to pay more rent for depriving you of that no longer shared space.
He doesnt get to have primary use of 2.rooms while only paying for one. If you and other roommate are in agreement you could offer to split the rent differently so he pays for primary use of the room he works in.
For example if rent is 1500 you currently split 3 ways so $500 each which isnt fair because you have the smallest room. Usually there is a master bed with a private bath which should cost more for the private bath if there is one. Since there are now 4 rooms being rented then 1500/4 is 375 per room. You and jason pay 375 each, and he would pay$750 because he is paying for 2 rms, his room and the room he works from. This still isnt quite fair if jason has a larger rm w a private bath.
Another way that is more equitable is to split is based on sq footage of rms.
You said you have the smallest lets say it is your room is 10*10 so 100sqft.
jasons is 1212 so 144 plus private bath in his larger room that is 88 that is 64 so his sq ft would be 208.
The basement room is the largest so lets say it is 16×16 so 256sq ft plus the room he works is 10×10 so 100 sq ft for a total of 356 sqft
356sqft for basement dweller,
208 sqft for jason
you have 100sq ft.
So the sq ft is 664 sq ft and rent is 1500 so 1500/664 is $2.26per sq ft.
So using the second method
your rent 100 sq ft 2.26 for $226
Jasons 208sq ft 2.26 for $470.08
Basement+workrm 356 sqft*2.26 $804.56
226+470.08+804.56= 1500
Obviously if jason doesnt have a private bath that would need to subtracted but however it is calculated you would come out ahead to redo rents based on sq footage being utilized. Of course in this scenario if he is paying for the workroom you and jason wouldnt be able to use it.
Or you could charge him 50% of the workroom cost and you and jason split the other for the hrs from 5pm to 8am. But then the basement dweller wouldnt be able to use the room during 5pm to 8am. If he wants access during those hrs as well you could split 50% for primary use during 8am5pm and split 5pm-8am 3 ways so everyone can use the tv room.
So 1010 100sqft 2.26=226 226/2=113
So the basement dweller would pay 113 for primary 8am5pm and
113/3 is 37.66 each or if only you and jason use 113/2 for 56.5 each.
NTA
He is monopolizing common space.
YOU are catering to him and letting him do it. Why?
It is your space too.
Do what you want, when you want, the way you want, in the common space. You are entitled to share that space with the others.
You absolutely CAN use the room when he is in it. If he doesn’t like it, he can move his desk to his own space.
If he still refuses to move to his own space, then you can ask him to leave/kick him out.
NTA. He can get a tv or three and set them up in the basement to show outside views, fake or real. Kinda like the Yule log thing, but blue skies and fluffy clouds.
Sun lamps. “White noise” of office chatter or street noise. A blowup doll secretary. You know, create the environment that makes him productive
It’s a shared space so share it while he’s on a video call. Plop on the couch in your underwear and turn on the tv. The desk will be downstairs in no time.
NTA tell him his work room is his area in the basement, if he continues using the common area then you will act the way it was meant for. If he doesnt like it move out. He is entitled and needs to be confronted about it, not a discussion but what will happen going forward..
I would walk around the shared living in a variety of costumes that his camera will pick up, do stupid dances to the most annoying music possible, maybe some Vengaboys. Constantly. I would invite friends round to help me.
NTA, start walking around naked when he’s on call he will move so fast to go back downstairs !
He chose to treat the common area as an office, but you don’t have to. You are entitled to it as much as he is. And since it isn’t an office, you may chill, watch a movie or invite company. In any case, NTA.
NTA, if he’s not prepared to let you all use the space as it is intended, then he’ll have to move out.
I’d be walking through that room in my drawers yapping on the phone using my outside voice.
I’d plop down on the couch and turn on the tv at max volume.
He has made choices – basement, changing jobs, etc. The absolute balls on this guy thinking he can force those choices onto you by taking over the shared living spaces.
time for him to go, NTA
Tell him he has to move out. He is taking massive advantage…
NTA. And honestly, I’d use the space regardless. I’d watch tv. Talk in the phone etc. you have just as much right to the common area as he does.