Context : I’ve been dating a guy for about 4 months. He’s extremely organized. A bit over a week ago, he said he was missing a singular black sock & asked if it was at my place. Oddly enough, I remembered it was in my laundry basket. He had me FaceTime him to make sure it was the correct sock (weird but ok). Set it aside.
The whole week+ he’s mentioned the sock every day. He finally came over but I had decided to wash the sock in case it was dirty before giving it back so now it was in my clean laundry. We got busy & forgot to get it out before he left.
Today, we were on FaceTime. It had been a very long week & I didn’t get home until 11:30pm, meaning I wouldn’t get to his apartment until almost 1am. He asks about the sock. I hadn’t fished it out of my clean laundry, so I told him to get it when he’s here again. He made a comment about how bad he needs it back (he is a wealthy man with a large amount of socks, so this isn’t urgent). I jokingly tell him I know he’s organized af but it’ll be fine. He keeps going on & on about the sock.
I ask why he cares so much about this sock he’s been bringing up for over a week. Knowing I have a toddler, work, speech therapy for my kid, drs appts, etc. I don’t have time to find the sock most days & it was a SINGLE sock.. why is it so important 😅
He then tells me he doesn’t care about the sock & he “just wanted to see how many comments it would take for me to get mad”…. I wasn’t mad before… but after that comment, I am irritated. I ask why he’d want to make me mad on purpose & he says he thinks it’s funny. I tell him that feels kinda manipulative. He proceeds to tell me “see? It’s funny. You get mad so easily”. I wasn’t mad until then. I hung up bc It made me feel really weird tbh. He said I was getting “upset over a sock”. It’s about the comment & admitting he was seeing if he could anger me , not the sock.
I’ve had a rough week. So maybe I’m overthinking & rubbed the wrong way for no reason. But I cancelled on going to his place tonight & I’m not sure what to say tomorrow… it’s just a sock, yes. But that comment seemed odd 😅
Side note: he said he was just trying to mess with me so we could talk shit & laugh, but we do that when we’re joking around all the time. It’s never like this? So I’m confused ? This is a very stupid spat but we’ve only had a couple & somehow this is the 2nd😅
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Context : I’ve been dating a guy for about 4 months. He’s extremely organized. A bit over a week ago, he said he was missing a singular black sock & asked if it was at my place. Oddly enough, I remembered it was in my laundry basket. He had me FaceTime him to make sure it was the correct sock (weird but ok). Set it aside.
The whole week+ he’s mentioned the sock every day. He finally came over but I had decided to wash the sock in case it was dirty before giving it back so now it was in my clean laundry. We got busy & forgot to get it out before he left.
Today, we were on FaceTime. It had been a very long week & I didn’t get home until 11:30pm, meaning I wouldn’t get to his apartment until almost 1am. He asks about the sock. I hadn’t fished it out of my clean laundry, so I told him to get it when he’s here again. He made a comment about how bad he needs it back (he is a wealthy man with a large amount of socks, so this isn’t urgent). I jokingly tell him I know he’s organized af but it’ll be fine. He keeps going on & on about the sock.
I ask why he cares so much about this sock he’s been bringing up for over a week. Knowing I have a toddler, work, speech therapy for my kid, drs appts, etc. I don’t have time to find the sock most days & it was a SINGLE sock.. why is it so important 😅
He then tells me he doesn’t care about the sock & he “just wanted to see how many comments it would take for me to get mad”…. I wasn’t mad before… but after that comment, I am irritated. I ask why he’d want to make me mad on purpose & he says he thinks it’s funny. I tell him that feels kinda manipulative. He proceeds to tell me “see? It’s funny. You get mad so easily”. I wasn’t mad until then. I hung up bc It made me feel really weird tbh. He said I was getting “upset over a sock”. It’s about the comment & admitting he was seeing if he could anger me , not the sock.
I’ve had a rough week. So maybe I’m overthinking & rubbed the wrong way for no reason. But I cancelled on going to his place tonight & I’m not sure what to say tomorrow… it’s just a sock, yes. But that comment seemed odd 😅
Side note: he said he was just trying to mess with me so we could talk shit & laugh, but we do that when we’re joking around all the time. It’s never like this? So I’m confused ? This is a very stupid spat but we’ve only had a couple & somehow this is the 2nd😅
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> I believe I might be the asshole because I may have taken his comment to heart too much. It’s been a long ass week , thanks Reddit bot
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA please save yourself from this relationship. Your partner should never “test” what will anger you… this isn’t a psychology experiment, this is about caring for someone (you) and respecting their time and feelings.
ETA: you are not mad about the sock. Him re-characterizing it as you being mad about the sock is manipulative and shitty.
He is checking how much control he has over you. He’s making you doubt yourself and your real priorities over a sock.
It’s been 4 months and he is telling you who he is. Trust him and run! NTA
NTA – anyone who does something specifically to piss you off and then responds with “isnt it so funny how mad you got over something so little/isnt if funny how easily you get mad” isnt worth dating imo. thats the kind of shit my teenage cousins do and then when i tell them that rage baiting is gonna have consequences theyre shocked. this is a grown man, he knows better. give him the sock back and dump him – youre already raising one kid, you shouldnt have to put up with another
NTA. That’s just sociopathic. (Until he gave his reason I honestly was going to ask if he was neurodivergent.)
YTA, you’re clearly making excuses and just trying to steal this poor man’s black sock.
NAH.
Way to go with your conspiracies.
Dude is most likely on the autistic spectrum, more into OCD side. This causes the need to be organized (and mention it a lot, if there is a feeling in the back of your head that something is wrong). This may also cause weirdly phrased answers when getting directly confronted.
NTA. The fact that he wanted to see how much it took you to get mad is a huge red flag. I was married to someone like this. It starts that way and, over time, turns into something else. Save yourself from this relationship. You deserve a partner who doesn’t delight in upsetting you.
Updateme
He may really be that anal and covering it by saying it’s a joke..but it’s not a joke. It’s control.
Send the sock back by post, make a small hole in it first.
NTA.
NTA, who the heck does that
I AmNnot going to read any of this. It’s not the sock. Go to therapy.
NTA… you sure it wasn’t a red sock?
Couples build each other up, not break each other down.
Send the sock by registered post.