AITA for being mad that I got left outside at a bar

r/

From Arkansas and we drove 7 hours to a boating event. Had a good time all weekend.

Yesterday we went out at 9am. I told everyone on the way “oh I forgot my wallet in the living room” but we decided I didn’t need it.

Around 10PM there was this party at a bar/marina and they were ID’ing. Well I somehow got past this we all got in. But after like 45 mins someone saw I didn’t have an ID and kicked me out. To be clear I was not being a problem or anything of that sort and I’m 30. So I get walked out. No big deal.

None of my group comes with me. And they leave me outside on the dock for like 30+mins and then they act like I am the asshole.

Comments

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    From Arkansas and we drove 7 hours to a boating event. Had a good time all weekend.

    Yesterday we went out at 9am. I told everyone on the way “oh I forgot my wallet in the living room” but we decided I didn’t need it.

    Around 10PM there was this party at a bar/marina and they were ID’ing. Well I somehow got past this we all got in. But after like 45 mins someone saw I didn’t have an ID and kicked me out. To be clear I was not being a problem or anything of that sort and I’m 30. So I get walked out. No big deal.

    None of my group comes with me. And they leave me outside on the dock for like 30+mins and then they act like I am the asshole.

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    Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment.

    OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:

    > I could be the asshole for leaving my wallet.

    I could be the asshole for getting kicked out even tho I was just standing there.

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  3. lihzee Avatar

    > But after like 45 mins someone saw I didn’t have an ID and kicked me out.

    INFO – how did they see that you didn’t have an ID? Were you carded?

    You’re 30 and decided you didn’t need your wallet for 12+ hours, rather than just running back inside and getting it like a normal adult?

  4. baseball_dad Avatar

    You were the one who forgot your ID and decided not to go back to get it.

  5. Consistent_Ad_805 Avatar

    YTA. What were you expecting? You know you need ID in bar. Who foot your bill for the day while you had no wallet? 
    If you are Apple Pay person then download digital ID on your phone. You need to grow up. You can’t be mad at others for your mistakes. 

  6. HorseFeathersFur Avatar

    I really don’t understand how a 30 year old can walk out the door without their wallet when going out anywhere. Don’t you need money or your ID? What if something happened? This is totally on you, maybe you’ll remember to keep it with you next time.

  7. Recent-Ferret7327 Avatar

    YTA. I get where you might feel upset about nobody going outside with you, but it was ultimately you who forgot your wallet and didn’t go back for it. You’re 30. You should know that you will probably need your wallet if you’re going out with friends.

  8. OtherRepresentative2 Avatar

    ESH, you’re an adult you should have made sure you had your wallet but your friends shouldn’t have pressured you to come along without it. And what stopped you from getting Uber to wherever you were staying? Or were you really going to party all day and then drive seven hours home?

  9. TheLawLord Avatar

    YTA. You forgot your wallet, which happens sometimes. Your friends didn’t let your error spoil their planned fun. You shouldn’t expect them to sit outside with you when the original fault is entirely on you.

  10. ShannaraRose Avatar

    ESH. You knew you didn’t have your id and you all ‘decided’ you didn’t need it. You went along with the whole going to the bar where alcohol was served and ‘somehow’ got past it. You got caught and escorted out. If your ‘friends’ couldn’t be inconvenienced to go back and grab your wallet so you could actually go with them to a location where they were serving alcohol, why would you think they’d leave with you?

    You either need to be more careful about where your wallet is, or get some better friends who won’t finish off the evening at a place where they know one of you can’t legally be. Unless, of course, that they’re used to you forgetting your wallet. It’s not like convenient forgetfulness isn’t sometimes a thing in some friend groups.

  11. MNcrazygirl Avatar

    This sounds like ragebait. I’m sorry but if you are going out even in the morning still bring your wallet. It’s your own fault for not doing that when going to a place like a bar, sorry that your friends wanted to have a good time with you stuck outside but again that’s on you

    YTA

  12. hero_of_kvatch215 Avatar

    YTA- your wallet, your responsibility. Other people shouldn’t have to cut their night early because you’re a 30 year old that doesn’t keep their ID on them

  13. olneyvideo Avatar

    YTA- 30 min to gather everyone up and finish their drinks to leave because their friend got kicked out sounds about average. When I worked the door at bars I would be out there with the dumbass we kicked out and I was counting down the minutes until the friends made their way out so they could take him away. 30 min is about avg

  14. bubblyH2OEmergency Avatar

    YTA you are an adult, you need your wallet.

    i could see being disappointed if you were married to one of them but this is not something to be mad at your friends about.

    also you probably owe your friends money now

  15. ConflictGullible392 Avatar

    Info: how far were you from home when you realized you didn’t have your wallet? Did you decide you didn’t need it or did you want to turn around and they didn’t?

  16. PAX_MAS_LP Avatar

    No one is the AH, though if your friends knew you forgot your wallet, it isn’t super nice.

    The whole situation sucks but with you forgetting your wallet, It’s your fault.

    Fault aside, it doesn’t mean anyone is an AH.

    30 minutes isn’t bad. That is about the amount of time to:

    1. Realize your gone
    2. Pay the bill
    3. Potty and go.

    That would be respectable of them.

  17. plushmaze Avatar

    nah you’re not the asshole. you literally told them you didn’t have your wallet, got kicked out through no fault of your own, and they still just left you outside like a stray dog?? i’d be mad too. that’s not friend behavior.

  18. 5PeeBeejay5 Avatar

    YTA keep track of your wallet

  19. WholeAd2742 Avatar

    YTA

    You went to a bar without ID. They don’t need to risk the liability or their license because you were too irresponsible

  20. RumblinWreck2004 Avatar

    YTA: It’s your responsibility as an adult to make sure you have your shit when you walk out the door.

  21. DeltaVega_7957 Avatar

    You should have had your wallet with you.
    You say “we decided”…but you decided, too.
    You could have asked to be taken back to retrieve it…but you didn’t.

  22. 08_IfHeHolla Avatar

    Info: Were you the main character of this gathering? Was everyone there specifically to see you, and ensure you had a good time?

    Also, was everyone involved in your decision to leave without your wallet? How much responsibility did they all assume when you knowingly left it at home?

  23. brownells2 Avatar

    YTA you’re 30. You know better. You don’t need permission to grab an uber and get your wallet.

  24. Sandi375 Avatar

    There are some holes in this story. Why would they suddenly realize you don’t have any ID? Did your friends know you were kicked out? Did they agree they would meet you outside? Why did you let someone convince you not to bring your wallet?

    I have a feeling you’re leaving a good chunk of what happened out of this story.

  25. wanderer866 Avatar

    30 minutes? YTA. Get over yourself. The world doesn’t stop and go based on you.

  26. KlaatuStandsStill Avatar

    I don’t think anyone is the story is an asshole, but it is solely on you. Is your expectation that everyone else ends their planned evening because you alone were careless?

  27. Ok_Map7691 Avatar

    30 years old. Waiting outside for 30 minutes. Not hours. YTA

  28. OrlandoEd Avatar

    YTA. Thirty and you forgot your wallet? I’m hearing this a lot about your generation. What gives?

  29. Fantor73 Avatar

    Everyone should cease their good time bc you forgot your wallet? YTA.

  30. cinereo_1 Avatar

    Considering you forgot your ID, YTA. Why would anyone go out any where without their ID on them?

  31. its_blue_monday Avatar

    YTA never leave the house without your id!!! I live in NYC and the cops are notorious for stopping people and asking for ID and if you dont have it they’ll detain you

    Be careful

  32. Maximum_System_7819 Avatar

    Could you not go home or go pick up your id at that point? 

  33. sjw_7 Avatar

    YTA

    So basically they subbed your entire day out because you didn’t have your wallet and then you expect them to end their evening early because you had to stand outside for half an hour.

    You should be apologising to them for cutting their evening short because you cant do a simple thing like remember your wallet.