NEED OPINIONS!
I’ve never posted before but this was so insane I need opinions on it. I, (19f) live with two other girls (RM1, and RM2, 19f). we have a little townhouse to ourselves in a nice neighborhood. yesterday, i was in class, a major-specific smaller class when i get a bunch of messages in on my apple watch, the first being “guys we were robbed” it was hard to see the full convo on my watch, but i got that we were robbed and my roommates were freaking out over it. i panicked and told my professor what was happening and asked to leave, which he let me. (i had ridden with a friend to class, so she also had to leave with me) in the car i look through the texts, seeing RM2 say she was sobbing because all of her jewelry was gone, and RM1 saying her laptop and devices were gone. i call them as my friend is driving me home, and they tell me how the cops are at our house, RM2 was upstairs and heard noises but ignored it and when she came back down our stuff gone. they also said that there was a pocketknife left on our front porch that the cops had taken it for finger prints. at this point i have already texted my parents what was going on, and they, understandably, were also freaking out. i’m on the verge of tears asking RM1 to check my room, my jewelry (some of my stuff is real jewelry given down to me from my grandparents that has a lot of sentimental value) when i hear RM2 in the background. they begin laughing, saying that we weren’t robbed. i hung up and didn’t answer any of their subsequent calls. (for context, when i left for class i did not lock the front door because RM1 was home, and as we live in a good town and she was in the house i didn’t think i needed to. they did this as a “punishment” for not locking the door) i went home, didn’t speak to them and had to go to to a department event that night soon after. at the event my same professor and classmates from earlier were concerned and checking in on me and i had to explain to my professor and others that i left his class early over a prank, which was humiliating. my parents had also started to contact people who live near our college town to see if anyone could come check on me, and they had to call friends back and explain that i was fine, it was a joke that my roommates pulled, which made them upset to have to do. when i got home later they were sitting on the couch watching a movie and didn’t say anything to me. i was still so angry i just went straight to my room. this morning they have also made no effort to apologize and it seems like they are mad im mad? in the past, they’ve spun things back on me and made me feel bad for being upset at them. i’m worried about that happening again, but also don’t want to overreact. it was just a prank but it caused me and my parents panic and i (and a friend!) had to leave class because of it. am i the asshole? TLDR: my roomates told me our house was robbed as a prank, which caused me to panic and leave class.
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I’ve never posted before but this was so insane I need opinions on it. I, (19f) live with two other girls (RM1, and RM2, 19f). we have a little townhouse to ourselves in a nice neighborhood. yesterday, i was in class, a major-specific smaller class when i get a bunch of messages in on my apple watch, the first being “guys we were robbed” it was hard to see the full convo on my watch, but i got that we were robbed and my roommates were freaking out over it. i panicked and told my professor what was happening and asked to leave, which he let me. (i had ridden with a friend to class, so she also had to leave with me) in the car i look through the texts, seeing RM2 say she was sobbing because all of her jewelry was gone, and RM1 saying her laptop and devices were gone. i call them as my friend is driving me home, and they tell me how the cops are at our house, RM2 was upstairs and heard noises but ignored it and when she came back down our stuff gone. they also said that there was a pocketknife left on our front porch that the cops had taken it for finger prints. at this point i have already texted my parents what was going on, and they, understandably, were also freaking out. i’m on the verge of tears asking RM1 to check my room, my jewelry (some of my stuff is real jewelry given down to me from my grandparents that has a lot of sentimental value) when i hear RM2 in the background. they begin laughing, saying that we weren’t robbed. i hung up and didn’t answer any of their subsequent calls. (for context, when i left for class i did not lock the front door because RM1 was home, and as we live in a good town and she was in the house i didn’t think i needed to. they did this as a “punishment” for not locking the door) i went home, didn’t speak to them and had to go to to a department event that night soon after. at the event my same professor and classmates from earlier were concerned and checking in on me and i had to explain to my professor and others that i left his class early over a prank, which was humiliating. my parents had also started to contact people who live near our college town to see if anyone could come check on me, and they had to call friends back and explain that i was fine, it was a joke that my roommates pulled, which made them upset to have to do. when i got home later they were sitting on the couch watching a movie and didn’t say anything to me. i was still so angry i just went straight to my room. this morning they have also made no effort to apologize and it seems like they are mad im mad? in the past, they’ve spun things back on me and made me feel bad for being upset at them. i’m worried about that happening again, but also don’t want to overreact. it was just a prank but it caused me and my parents panic and i (and a friend!) had to leave class because of it. am i the asshole? TLDR: my roomates told me our house was robbed as a prank, which caused me to panic and leave class.
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> i have ignored my roommates since the prank, and have probably not handled their joke as well as i should. someone calling me an asshole could be correct because i did leave the front door unlocked, so my roommates have a right to be annoyed about that.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA: it’s totally reasonable to be pissed off about this.
NTA. Roommates were the AH’s. Just remember to always lock your doors please.
NTA.
This is incredibly childish of them. This affected not only your schooling, but how your classmates and professor will view you from now on.
DO NOT let them off on this. Write out what you want to say, sit on it for a bit, and come back to it for revision. Your first draft will be clouded by emotions. I’d also start looking for a new place to live ASAP, and blast them in your social circle for this stunt. Anyone who might move in with them should know they stand the risk of being the butt of this kind of “prank” in the future.
“What you did was incredibly immature and childish. You’ve caused damage to my reputation in my school, and now I look like the boy who cried wolf to my professor and parents. I expect an apology to not only be offered to me, but to my professor for your behavior.”
That might (and that’s a really iffy might) be a funny prank among people who know each other decently well and who are standing there in person.
It would have been one thing if they hid some stuff, waiting for you to come home, and then pretended to “discover” getting robbed, see you panic, and then tell you right away.
But to do it over text and not let you know for a long time (enough to leave class, call people, start driving home, etc.) is lunatic behavior.
You absolutely have every right to be mad. NTA.
NTA- an in-home burglary is a major blow to how safe a person feels in their own home. And not to mention you were taken out of a college class youre paying for. Their joke cost you your sense of security and literal money you paid for your class you would’ve otherwise been in. I’ve removed people from my life over less.
NTA but your roommates sure are. Pranks are only good if the one pranked thinks it’s funny . This landed wrong, and their lack of an apology is telling. They are acting mad at you because they realize they did something crappy and are too small to admit it.
Get better roommates ASAP.
NTA Bill them for the cost of one class. Then turn your phone off in all future classes – if there is an emergency it will still be am emergency after class.
How many times had you left the door unlocked? Has it been an ongoing issue that’s escalated?
NTA. Malicious “pranks” aren’t cool.
Info: You left the front door unlocked deliberately. Had your roommates previously told you that it bothers them?
This is either everybody sucks or not the asshole, but I can’t tell from your post. Their retaliation was certainly out of line – completely unhinged if it was the first step – but if you’ve been dismissing their concerns and actively compromising their safety and security then I don’t have nearly as much sympathy for you.
ESH- always lock the door. You’d feel terrible if your roommate was murdered
ESH: I can understand WHY your roommates did this… you left a door unlocked and they are trying to “teach” you how important it is that the door be locked.
So I would vote NTA for being mad… but YTA for leaving the door unlocked.
But your roommates get a YTA for pulling this “prank” at a time where there were collateral consequences (interrupting class) beyond momentarily causing you worry that you’ve been robbed.
NTA. That wasn’t a prank. That was a mind game. And it sounds like they’ve pulled this gaslighty “you’re too sensitive” stuff before. Time to seriously rethink living with them
YTA. What they did was extreme but you were obviously putting others in danger by not locking the doors and they were sick of you ignoring their safety concerns. There is no such thing as a totally safe town. It takes just one person, one incident, for one of your roommates to be raped, robbed or killed. Get your head out of your ass and lock the door when you leave. It takes less than a minute.
NTA, your roommates are the worst kind of immature children around. How you reacted was valid and you are upset because what they did was EXTREMELY immature and dangerous. What if you had panicked and got into a accident? What if your parents left work to drive down and check on you? I’ll be honest I hate pranks at even the lightest of times but this? This is straight up foolishness. They are way to old to do something this immature. Your entitled to a apology and honestly they should be chewed out by their parents. If they wish to act like small children then perhaps their parents need to treat them as such.
NTA … They have no consideration …. move when your lease is up!
That prank was in extremely poor taste and the owe you and everyone else involved an apology.
NTA!!! I’d move out. (I know, easier said than done). They’re the AHs. They had no right to punish you a nor did they have the right to cause all that stress on you, knowing that you would want to leave class.
Then they don’t apologize!?! Not just to you, but the friend who also had to leave class, the professor for the interruption of his class, and your parents for causing them to worry.
Idk if they’ve asked you before to lock the door even if someone is home, but if they didn’t that makes them even bigger AHs.
Why didn’t they just talk to you? Because they are too immature and untrustworthy.
NTA, what they did was way over the line, should you have locked the door, yes. But that was an extreme thing to do when you are all adults and should have just had a conversation about what your expectations are with being roommates. The only time I would say their prank was justified was if you have repeatedly left the door unlocked and they have tried multiple times to have conversations with you but you kept doing it.
ESH:
You for leaving the door unlocked. Always lock the door. I’m not blaming you in anyway, I’m just saying always lock your door.
Your roommates are the biggest AHs ever. They could have talked to you like mature adults instead of pulling this stupid ass prank.
> for context, when i left for class i did not lock the front door because RM1 was home, and as we live in a good town and she was in the house i didn’t think i needed to. they did this as a “punishment” for not locking the door
ESH.
This was a cruel prank, but what were you doing by not locking the door?
NTA.
You not locking the door is a problem. That’s a real thing they have a right to be mad at…
But this… This is not an appropriate response. This is a major escalation. It’s a fucking declaration of war, which isn’t something you wanna do with friends or roommates.
This is NOT a prank.
I can not emphasize that enough. This is NOT OK. This will NEVER be funny to you, or people who care about you. That’s the difference between a prank and abuse.
Move out when you can.
It’s a big deal. I would not consider these people friends any more. And don’t read stuff from them during class, or anything even vaguely important, any more.
Move when you can.
paragraphs would be the least you could do if you want people to read your stuff
NTA they are cruel.
Saying that, I HAVE had someone try to break into my apartment while I was home alone. Thank goodness my door was locked. Please be sure the door is always locked for safety, whether someone is home or not.
Slight ESH. First rule of leaving the house is always lock the door — no matter what neighborhood you live in or who is home, especially in a college town (I know several people who lost bikes in their garage that way — they didn’t close it all the way). I do wonder though, is this an ongoing problem? Have your roommates brought this up and asked you to fix it? If so, that is a problem you need to correct, immediately. HOWEVER, what your roommates did was unhinged, making them major AH. You do not joke about a home invasion/robbery. I’d find new roommates and friends, cause they ain’t it.
NTA – Even if you’ve been leaving the door unlocked when no one was home, at night, regularly, or when asked to be more careful. (Which is not cool/safe.) The response is insane.
You were pulled out of class, POLICE WERE INVOLVED, and plus all your family stuff.
I mean, if they admitted to it being a prank/lesson while the cops were there, I’d be shocked if they didn’t get a lecture on wasting police time at BEST. They could be dealing with actual crimes.
In fact, if the cops don’t know, I’d be tempted to tell them. Stop them from wasting further resources on that knife/prints etc. Ya, your roommates might get in shit over it, but they deserve it.
I’d get into a new living situation and dump those reckless idiots ASAP. Unless you can explain to them why what they did was so wrong, and they genuinely regret what they’ve done. Even then, I can see them actually stealing your shit if you piss them off somehow.
Edit: ok ok I read the wall of text wrong. My bad!
NTA, that was an absolutely awful thing for them to do.
It wasn’t a prank. Pranks are funny. These girls caused you distress and caused you to disrupt your education, caused a lot of people to be worried, and caused resources to be wasted, all because you <checks notes> didn’t lock your housemate inside the house?
You’re NTA. Move your valuables to a safe place (they now know what you value and how valuable your jewelry is!) and move out at the first opportunity.
Was the door locked when you opened it to leave? Is the door unlocked when people are home?
Just curious…there seems to be a majority of comments saying OP WAS an AH….suppose she was injured or in a wreck rushing home? Would it still be, “Well, if she had locked the freakin’ door, we wouldn’t have pranked her and she wouldn’t have gotten injured.
If forgetting to lock the door has been a problem all along, then strong correction (not pranking) may be needed..if this was the first offense, then room mates were/are SERIOUS JAGOVS!!!
And, I would be looking for a way to fuck them both over without it being overt…jerks require pay back!
ESH
Don’t leave your door unlocked.
Now that you know your roommates are both absolute idiots, you won’t be tricked by them again.
Get your good jewelry into a safe deposit box, never leave anything like that in a college apartment.
At the first opportunity, get new roommates.
NTA. I’d find another place to live.
INFO: Is you leaving and leaving the door unlocked a repeat problem they’ve tried to talk with you about before? If so, E S H. If this was the first time you made that mistake, N T A and they should’ve mentioned it calmly, like adults.
I had a college roommate who refused to lock the door, ever. She grew up very sheltered in a tiny town with zero crime, and couldn’t get it through her head that the whole world wasn’t like that. I got frustrated with her over this (and other issues), but never would’ve done something as drastic and childish as these roommates did.
NTA. A robbery is an invasion of privacy and a scary situation. It’s not something to joke about. I’d be looking for somewhere else to live instead of being with those immature jagoffs.
NTA – this was not a “prank” – it was an elaborate and staged LIE. Get new roommates bc these ones are trash. And yeah, you learned the hard way to always lock the front door when departing. Safety first!
NTA
If you are in a position to be able to break your lease and move out you should.