A few weeks ago (im not a very confrontational person so im still thinking about this.. lol) i got on the bus. A dude got on a few stops after me , and he sat across from me on the bus. But he then proceeded to take his shoes off (no socks) and put his feet up on the seat by him. he looks to be very dirty, probably homeless, but im not able to smell him or anything.
I had kind of a shitty day and I was exhausted and just irritated he did this… I notice immediately and without thinking say, loud enough for him and accidentally the bus driver to hear, “Did you seriously just take your shoes off on the bus?”
He immediately gives me an ‘oh, shit, sorry’ look and puts his shoes back on. Doesn’t say anything to me.
I was relatively close to him as we were just across from each other but I didn’t smell any foot odor. He only had his naked feet out for maybe 10 seconds though.
A few people on the bus gave me dirty looks. I was kind of surprised he didn’t even say anything to me, I was surprised I even said anything, and I was surprised he immediately put his shoes back on.
I then felt like a total asshole especially since i didnt smell his feet or him but i could have if his feet were out any longer i didnt know! and to clarify that had nothing to do with him appearing possibly homeless, it’s that his feet were out and feet stink. and isn’t taking your shoes off on the bus like, rude and gross? i don’t normally talk like that even to people who are being dicks to me, people gave me dirty looks afterward, so i have been second guessing myself. i now wish i said ‘thank you’ to him or something.
so, AITA?
TL;DR I kind of rudely called out a dude for taking his shoes off on the bus, and he puts them back on immediately. AITA
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A few weeks ago (im not a very confrontational person so im still thinking about this.. lol) i got on the bus. A dude got on a few stops after me , and he sat across from me on the bus. But he then proceeded to take his shoes off (no socks) and put his feet up on the seat by him. he looks to be very dirty, probably homeless, but im not able to smell him or anything. I had kind of a shitty day and I was exhausted and just irritated he did this… I notice immediately and without thinking say, loud enough for him and accidentally the bus driver to hear, “Did you seriously just take your shoes off on the bus?”
He immediately gives me an ‘oh, shit, sorry’ look and puts his shoes back on. Doesn’t say anything to me.
I was relatively close to him as we were just across from each other but I didn’t smell any foot odor. He only had his naked feet out for maybe 10 seconds though.
A few people on the bus gave me dirty looks. I was kind of surprised he didn’t even say anything to me, I was surprised I even said anything, and I was surprised he immediately put his shoes back on. I then felt like a total asshole especially since i didnt smell his feet or him but i could have if his feet were out any longer i didnt know! and isn’t taking your shoes off on the bus like, rude and gross? i don’t normally talk like that even to people who are being dicks to me, people gave me dirty looks afterward, so i have been second guessing myself. i now wish i said ‘thank you’ to him or something.
so, AITA?
TL;DR I kind of rudely called out a dude for taking his shoes off on the bus, and he puts them back on immediately. AITA
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1) I called the dude out quite louder than I meant to, and i called him out rather than asking him to put his shoes back on.
2) It might make me the asshole because he immediately put them back on, i didnt smell any foot odor immediately, and people gave me dirty looks.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
You reacted impulsively, but I get your frustration. Public spaces have unwritten rules.
NTA barely, though you probably were a bit harsh due to your bad mood. That’s disgusting and we need to take a stand against that kind of behavior. Even if he was homeless and didn’t have shoes, you don’t put your feet on the seat.
I personally hate feet to begin with so I might of slipped and said something quick too
NTA – you were not overly rude about it, and there is a social convention of not just getting your sweaty feet out and draping them over public seating. Maybe you could have just let it be if there was no acute hygiene issue, maybe you were lashing out a bit because it’s been a bad day. But it’s not as if you got verbally abusive or escalated it physically.
Nta.
But in Australia where I live, shoes are basically optional. So if you live here YTA.
VERY mild YTA
General etiquette on public transit is to mind your own business unless someone is doing something dangerous or extremely disgusting. If his feet smelled super nasty that’s one thing, but you said you didn’t even smell them, so they didn’t.
Middle-class people take their shoes off on airplanes all the time to relax. I’ve seen it many times. I think you were overly harsh and judgmental because you’d had a bad day. So it’s YTA, but it was a low-energy incident and no one got hurt really so I’d say it’s very mild.
YTA. Now just in that moment in time. I am sure you are a good person. As you said his feet didn’t stink so I guess he recently got ahold of a shower and just wanted to felax his feet. Being homeless must be murder on the feet and it sounds like he recently got clean. Have a good night.
NTA! Feet are for the floor! Even if your feet are tired, you can still relax and take the weight off them by sitting down. It’s a hygiene issue, because no matter how clean people’s feet look, you could be spreading foot fungus etc. You wouldn’t go to a stranger’s home and put your bare feet on the seats without permission, so don’t do it in public transport!