My boyfriend and I decided to take a weeklong vacation in California recently. That also happens to be where my sister is located so I let her know weeks in advance that we will be in there in the hopes that we could grab food together sometime. She lets
me know that her schedule is super packed (work during the day and class in the evening) and that the only days she has available are Wednesday evening and Friday evening. However, she’s already made Friday plans w her friends so she’s only available Wednesday. We loosely decide on possibly seeing each other Wednesday for dinner.
On Tuesday of the week of the vacation, my sister and I solidify that we will see each other Wednesday. It takes a lot of back and forth to decide on a restaurant because my hotel is a bit far from her & additionally all 3 of us are a bit picky about food. Initially she brought up going somewhere about 16 minutes from her and 50 minutes from me but the place looked eh so I didn’t really want to make the drive for it so I rejected that. Anyway, we end up deciding on a KBBQ chain that is 13 miles away from her and 23 miles from us. HOWEVER, very late at night on Tuesday, I realize that the location I picked doesn’t have something on the menu that I really wanted to eat. So I ended up finding another location that had what I wanted on the menu and messaged her around Midnight if that would be ok with her. I thought that this would be a “win win” situation because I checked prior to messaging her that the place would be closer (9 miles away from her instead of 13) to the city that she’s in AND i’d get to eat what I wanted.
Fast forward to Wednesday. She messages me around 6AM asking “can I let you know after work if I’m going
I’ve been a little tired”. I tell her no & to just cancel because I do not want to wait until she’s done with work (around 3-4PM) to see if i’m having dinner with her or not. I had already planned out lunch and other activities around seeing her & felt like it would be annoying to do everything under the guise that i’d have dinner with her and then not have dinner. She doesn’t take this well and lashes out, calling me inconsiderate as well throwing in irrelevant personal insults.
To her defense, the 2nd location I suggested is further than the 1st location but a handful of miles and therefore not the “win win” I envisioned. However, I did not know this because I don’t have her exact location and just typed the city she’s in into google. But to my defense, I would’ve been fine just going to the 1st location if she had told me that. Instead she just gave me a “maybe” in response to the 2nd location & didn’t explain that to me till we were already arguing.
This is a silly argument but we haven’t talked in a week now over it. I’m hurt about her lashing out and I assume she’s hurt because i’m inconsiderate.