So, last year my friend Sarah needed $2,000 for an emergency, and I lent it to her ‘cause I wanted to help. She said she’d pay me back in 6 months. Well, it’s been over a year, and I still haven’t seen a dime. Every time I asked, she said she was tight on money and would pay me when she could.
Then, outta nowhere, she posts about this crazy luxury Bali trip — fancy resorts, private villas, the whole deal. I was kinda shocked, like, if she could afford that, why no payment? I messaged her, kept it chill, just said, “Hey, I see you’re enjoying Bali! Can we talk about the $2,000 you owe me? Feels like I’m being taken for granted.” She flipped, called me petty and jealous, said I had no right to say anything, then blocked me.
So, AITA for asking for my money back when she’s clearly spending on lux stuff?
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So, last year my friend Sarah needed $2,000 for an emergency, and I lent it to her ‘cause I wanted to help. She said she’d pay me back in 6 months. Well, it’s been over a year, and I still haven’t seen a dime. Every time I asked, she said she was tight on money and would pay me when she could.
Then, outta nowhere, she posts about this crazy luxury Bali trip — fancy resorts, private villas, the whole deal. I was kinda shocked, like, if she could afford that, why no payment? I messaged her, kept it chill, just said, “Hey, I see you’re enjoying Bali! Can we talk about the $2,000 you owe me? Feels like I’m being taken for granted.” She flipped, called me petty and jealous, said I had no right to say anything, then blocked me.
So, AITA for asking for my money back when she’s clearly spending on lux stuff?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I asked my friend to pay back $2,000 I lent her over a year ago after she posted about a luxury vacation. The action I want judged is bringing up the loan repayment while she was publicly sharing expensive trip details. I might be the asshole because calling her out on her spending could seem like I’m policing her personal finances or shaming her, which upset her enough that she blocked me. I can see how she might feel embarrassed or attacked, even if I just wanted to get my money back.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA, save the texts and take her to small claims
NTA.
It’s not even about the luxury vacation. It’s about the loan being well past due. She said she’d repay you after six months. Over twelve months later she hasn’t repaid you. People don’t get to default just because they don’t feel like paying it back.
I hope you have the agreement in writing. Consider whether it would be worth taking her to court over it.
Don’t lend her any additional money, ever. She’s proven that she’s untrustworthy.
NTA. Tell her if she doesn’t pay you back in the next two weeks you’re taking her to small claims court. And don’t ever loan money again without a signed agreement.
Treat it as paying 2k to get rid of someone who is not fit to have your friendship. Good friends who help you out in a jam are precious and should be cherished. This person is not one of them and sooner or later they will run out of runway.
I know it’s annoying. You think they’ve gotten one over on you, but the reality is you’ve now got them figured out. This is a valuble life lesson.
NTA
But I don’t think you are getting the money back.
NTA stop messing with her and just take her to small claims court
you can ask a rock for water. sure but you ain’t getting it
NTA- who wants a friend like that? Take her to small claims court.
NTA
Take her to small claims court because she never intends on paying you that money back.
NTA. Like others have said, take her to small claims court and be done with her ass.
Why did you message her? You need to reply to her post and ask about the 2k she owes you!
Unless you got a lawyer who works for free, kids that 2k goodbye, but keep the screenshots of the convo and use them to warn people
NTA. I’d say sorry you lost a friend, but all you lost was $2,000.
She’ll get back in contact again … when she wants you to give her more money. When she does, save yourself the time and effort and just laugh in her face and walk away.
NTA
It just cost you $2,000 to get a moocher out of your life.
In the long term, it will be good value.
This is why we should teach Shakespeare in schools.
>Neither a borrower, nor a lender be; For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
You are kinda the AH for giving her the money. She’s a liar and a user. But I guess NTA for asking for it back.
NTA-definetly not, keep all communications and get some papers filed at your local courthouse. Take her to small claims and get your money back, she has no plans to pay you or she would have already.
Take her to small claims court but I would name and shame. If she’s done it to you for $2K she’s done it to other people for both more and less money.
NTA obviously. Do you have a shared friend group where you can publicly ask others if they’ve leant her money and had her fail to repay? Not really to find out but to do a bit of passive aggressive public shaming. Then small claims if that doesn’t work.
NTA. She stole from you. Research the Small Claims statutes and procedures in your are.
This is why I have a hard rule of never lending money to people that are not my kids. Period. I’ll sit down and go over your budget to help you fix problems or I’ll gift you money if I’m feeling charitable (rarely). But I’m never ever loaning money between friends or family.
NTA. I hope you learned a valuable lesson. NEVER LOAN MONEY TO FAMILY OR FRIEND.
UPDATEME
I think your only recourse now is small claims
NTA. People need to stop loaning friends money.
You’ll never see your money back unless you can take her to court.
She is not your friend.NTA
Time for small claims court if you have her saying she will pay it in a text. And this friendship never existed as friends pay back loans and better friends don’t ask. NTA
Fakes as fuck. Like I seen 3 post today with the same topic
NTA. Never loan money to family or friends unless you can mentally view it as a gift. It rarely works out for anyone. That said, your $2k was gone a long time ago. That’s how much she valued your friendship. $2,000. You WNBTA if you put her on blast on social media so she can’t steal from anyone else. You also don’t need a lawyer for small claims court.
That’s a lot of money. If you have documentation of the loan, you can sue her in small claims
NTA. It’s time to send her a certified letter demanding repayment. After that, you’ll need to sue her in small claims court.
Have you tried discussing a payment plan?
Your friend is a user and a loser. You are NTA. Not sure what your legal recourse is to recoup the $2k now, but if you EVER loan anyone money, and I don’t care how well you think you know them, or even if you’re in a relationship with them or related to them, ALWAYS, ALWAYS get signed paperwork from the loanee acknowledging the terms of the loan. Otherwise any court can easily consider it a gift.
Common sense usually prevails in small claims court. Those courts assume you have no legal experience, and many jurisdictions either discourage the presence of lawyers, or outright disallow them. Proof that you were the source of the funds, and your testimony that she did not pay you back will create a credibility problem for her. Younger people with limited means typically don’t just “give” friends $2,000, so the judge will probably expect her to supply texts or e-mails that would indicate she disputed that it was loan. When you asked for the money, she should have claimed it was a gift, or denied you gave it to her. Instead, she attacked you, and then blocked you. Not a good look for her in the slightest.
She did not view you as a friend, but rather a resource and a victim. Just the act of filing may get your money back.
NTA but just know you’re never gonna get that money back without taking her to small claims court. She is totally taken advantage of you.
NTA – I’d exposed her for everyone to see. You thought you were helping a friend in need but turns out she only needed the money to go to Bali.