I’m 23 and am visiting home. My younger brother is 17 and recently got a girlfriend. I met her at a family dinner at Applebees. Everyone was being polite and formal. At some point, someone asked how long they’d been dating, and she said it was pretty new but that he was “really mature for his age.”
I laughed a little because he is not mature and was acting all nonchalant for no reason. So I told a story I thought was funny and harmless. It was about how during lockdown, he got really into Among Us and once refused to leave a game and ended up peeing his pants. Like fully peed himself. He ran to the toilet with his iPad, and the pee trailed on the ground it was so freaking funny.
I felt bad though, because he got quiet so I apologized during dinner and tried to tell embarrassing stories about myself, like when I got rejected or sharting stories.
After dinner, he blew up at me. He said I embarrassed him on purpose, and now his girlfriend probably thinks he’s gross and immature. I told him everyone has a story like that, and I didn’t say it to be mean. It’s just a funny memory. He said I “always do this” and said I should’ve warned him or something. He hasn’t really talked to me since, and now my mom says that teenage boys are sensitive about their image, and that my follow up stories were gross.
Edit: I think I was a little drunk
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I’m 23 and am visiting home. My younger brother is 17 and recently got a girlfriend. I met her at a family dinner at Applebees. Everyone was being polite and formal. At some point, someone asked how long they’d been dating, and she said it was pretty new but that he was “really mature for his age.
I laughed a little because he is not mature and was acting all nonchalant for no reason. So I told a story I thought was funny and harmless. It was about how during lockdown, he got really into Among Us and once refused to leave a game and ended up peeing his pants. Like fully peed himself. He ran to the toilet with his iPad, and the pee trailed on the ground it was so freaking funny.
After dinner, he blew up at me. He said I embarrassed him on purpose, and now his girlfriend probably thinks he’s gross and immature. I told him everyone has a story like that, and I didn’t say it to be mean. It’s just a funny memory. He said I “always do this” and said I should’ve warned him or something. He hasn’t really talked to me since, and now my mom says that teenage boys are sensitive about their image.
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I think I am the asshole because I embarrassed my teen brother infront of a girl with a very shameful story that makes him sound gross
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
YTA. It’s really not cool to embarrass someone that bad in front of his new girlfriend. It would be one thing if he just did that yesterday or something and you felt like she needed to know what kind of person he is today, but lockdown was like 4-5 years ago.
You sure you 23?
You took more time to redeem yourself than the story is actually interesting.
YTA. Sharting stories?…about yourself?…at dinner?…the first time you’re meeting your brothers gfs family? Did I read that right?
Yah. You need to apologize again, and take some free online etiquette classes.
YTA. How would you feel if one of your parents did that to you? AND THEN YOU MADE IT WORSE.
If you use autism and social nuance as an excuse, I swear as an autistic person I will disown you from autism club. Until you figure out what you did wrong, here is a tip: don’t tell stories about other people without their consent.
Disgusting
YTA. Sounds like you were jealous of your brother and the attention he was getting and you went and did something to put him down and bring negative attention to him. Then, you grossed everyone out at dinner. Like why bro? I don’t think this is innocent. You better apologize again and do better.
YTA. If you think sharing stories like that to his new girlfriend is an appropriate getting-to-know-you topic of conversation at the dinner table in a public restaurant, you are seriously mentally unwell. It’s not appropriate ever, but especially not under those circumstances. My god. You’re either not too bright, completely socially inept or you deeply despise your brother. SMDH.
So gross…
YTA and a big one.
Your brother’s comment, “that you always do this” tells me that you Deliberately told that story to humiliate and shame him in front of his new girlfriend.
At 23 years old, you should be deeply ashamed of yourself. You owe your brother a sincere and humble apology.
One can only hope that your callousness has not affected his new girlfriend’s image of him.
I’d like to see how you would feel if the roles were reversed and you were at your parents with your new boyfriend and your brother told an incredibly embarrassing and humiliating story about you.
You wouldn’t be so cavalier. I’d be willing to bet you’re single and jealous your brother met someone, so you had to try and ruin it for him.
You sound like an insufferable mean girl.
YTA
Ohh yeah YTA obviously teenagers are touchy and exceptionally so if they have their first relationships. As the older brother you should’ve known he would react like that. That was like undermining him in front of a person he wants to look good for
YTA. Are you sure you are 23?
YTA. Why would you do that to him. First of all, this is the first time you’ve met her. The impression you want to make is to embarrass your brother? Secondly, he’s 17. That’s an easily embarrassed age. It would be different if he were like 25 and you’d known her forever, but you know he wants to make a good impression on her. You sound cruel. You had the opportunity to hype your brother up, but instead you humiliated him.
You are most definitely TA. Why would you think it was a good or kind idea to tell a story like that? Your edit that you were a little drunk…. seems like you are the immature one here, since you can’t handle your liquor and not only shared a story about your brother, but then went into sharting stories at the dinner table. So classy and mature. Are you just so jealous that your little brother has a girlfriend?
YTA. I don’t think there is any possible story that can happen with you laughing at embarrassing stories about someone and not being an asshole.
YTA bro you gotta respect the teen’s vibe especially in front of his new girl no matter how funny you think the pee story is sometimes you gotta hold back or at least warn the dude before airing out his business drinking dont excuse ruining his moment he’s prob just embarrassed and feeling played so yeah maybe chill next time before roasting family
Lol yes yta. She said she liked his maturity and your first thought was to laugh and show her otherwise wtf😂
YTA, that happened what, 4-5 years ago? Shitty.
YTA
You know it.
It’s a good thing you were “a little drunk” because that clearly absolves you of terrible behavior.
/s
YTA
Fully.
Truly.
You’re clearly not mature.
YTA
Are you for real right now?!? “Funny and harmless”…. You don’t your brother’s GF that he PISSED HIS PANTS!! On what planet is this harmless?!
” I told him everyone has a story like that”….. Uh, no…. No we don’t.
“I didn’t say it to be mean”… The fuck you didn’t
Your mom is also an ah for implying your brother is being “sensitive” Yeah, cause teen females are the pilar of maturity… and aren’t at all emotional. LOL. It’s mind boggling to me that neither of you see how fucked up it is to reveal such an embarrassing story. You better hope he doesn’t know about you doing something as mortifying.
YTA. I hope he has a similar story about you to spread around town if anyone I’d dumb enough to date you. you are a jerk to tear him down like that
YTA. I don’t even know where to start, using one of the most embarrassing stories about your brother as soon as his new girlfriend says she likes his maturity or swinging back to yourself but with absolutely non-dinner appropriate stories.
If this is you drunk, you may want to consider not drinking at these kind of events.
YTA. You behaved like the annoying, dreaded, embarrassing family member we all avoid as soon as we can.
Being drunk is not an excuse but it is the trigger most of us learn to watch for as we grow up: “Aunt Myrtle has a martini, so keep a low profile;” or “Uncle Jeff cracked open a beer, so let’s all just play in the basement until dinner and then stay at the kids’ table.”
Now you have the information so don’t do that again. Now you’re sober but you’re still wondering if you were wrong?! How are you wondering about this? You were wrong. Apologize and figure out what you need to do to not bring up embarrassing moments of a sibling to make sure their new SO doesn’t think well of your sibling.
It’s pretty simple to understand that you were wrong: just try to see how you might feel if it were done to you: your SO praises you and someone else at dinner starts sharing the worst moments of your late childhood.
There’s a really nifty trick you can use to examine your own motives for telling a story and decide if you were an AH or not: see how you react when someone tells you that they found the story upsetting or embarrassing.
If your reaction is to say, “I’m so sorry! I certainly didn’t mean it that way and I never would have told it if I realized that it would hurt you,” then you probably aren’t an AH.
If you get defensive or try to minimize it, or especially if you try to justify why you are (or should be) allowed to tell the story, then you are almost certainly an AH.
YTA. You intentionally told an embarrassing story to make your brother seem immature in front of someone he wanted to make a good impression on. If there is any part of you that still thinks it was just “funny”, then I challenge you to tell it to your boss, only with you as the person who peed themselves.
> Edit: I think I was a little drunk
You think?
If you were only a little drunk, you would know. If you don’t, then you probably have a problem, and not just your personality.
Wow. That was really mean. That story will never be funny.
Are you seriously asking? You can’t figure this out? YTA and mean and you know it.
You’re an asshole and you know it. You more than likely showed up knowing full well what you were going to do to put him down. What a miserable person you must be.
There is no question. You’re totally YTA
I don’t understand why you even think there is a chance that you’re not here
YTA and it seems not for the first time. Try to be less of a jerk. First time you meet your 17 YO brother’s girlfriend is not the time to tell peeing stories. And then you told starting stories about yourself? At a family dinner? Classy.
YTA. Big time. Omg, you humiliated him.
YTA. No explanation needed
you’re an asshole and not as mature as you think you are. what’s wrong with you ?
you’re his sibling, she’s his girlfriend. obviously you’ll have a different perception of him and obviously he’ll act differently around you than with her
🤣😂🤜🏻 If ANYONE has ANY problems with harmless, funny family jabs and jokes and each others expense, you think far too highly of yourselves. NTA to me. Family jabs like this are fine where I came from. Because i did my best to embarrass my 2 older sisters when they brought men to meet the family too. Relax. It’s harmless, yet tough brotherly love. Little bro needs to take some personal extreme ownership and take it. He’ll be happier when he does. Own the silliness of one’s choices…..Besides, if he did and owned up to it with integrity and laughed about it with confidence to his girl friend, call the upholstery seamstress to replace the chair fabric. Her seat would be soaked.
YTA.
The way you tried to redirect the conversation with your own stories is shitty sitcom tactics and shows how you think the world is.
Apologize to your brother, his girlfriend, and the family that was present who had to listen to your crappy stories.
Learn to be a better person, brother, and son.
Who needs enemies with a sibling like you?
My older sister used to think it was funny to humiliate me, to spread embarrassing things and laugh about it and say it was just meant to be funny.
It escalated and she just kept meaner. She delighted in torturing me and shaming me and making me feel small.
We didn’t talk for 10+ years. I’m 42 now and she’s 44. We can be civil and even cordial at family gatherings, but we have zero relationship outside of that.
This is the dynamic you’re building for you and your brother.
Fwiw, my little sister and I are incredibly close, she’s one of my best friends and a core part of my life and social circle. So it’s not like I’m just some asshole who can’t get along with siblings.
Edit: Almost forgot, YTA. Apologize, actually sincerely apologize, to your brother and re-evaluate your behavior.
Be a better big brother. You literally suck for that.
YTA. You are emotionally abusive to him.
YTA.
You know it. Come on.
That’s text book bully younger brother in front of his girl.
Every shitty older brother has run that play.
YTA.
Completely crass story to tell at dinner anyway, (delightful that you followed up with sharting stories, which I’m sure everyone was thrilled by) but worse, you humiliated your brother and you know it. Shame on you.
YTA and getting drunk at family dinner is always a bad idea
YTA.
>she said it was pretty new but that he was “really mature for his age.”
Because seriously, nothing matures a teen boy faster than a girl he likes. He was even being polite and formal.
>So I told a story I thought was funny and harmless.
So you picked an embarrassing story from 5 years ago, when he was less mature… Now imagine if your brother told your boss that you got wasted and peed the bed while drunk when you were up for a promotion. It would be hilarious, right?
Toilet talk isn’t for a dinner table, especially with mixed company.
> (I) tried to tell embarrassing stories about myself, like when I got rejected or sharting stories.
You talked about sharting yourself to a stranger over dinner? Seriously, WTF is wrong in your brain?
>He said I “always do this”
Do you make a habit of embarrassing him in front of friends? What do you get out of this? Are you jealous of a child, or just miserable and want others to be?
>Edit: I think I was a little drunk
A “little” drunk? Either you were drunk and need to stop to keep your poop stories filtered, or you weren’t and you’re just insufferable. But maybe cut back until you figure out which.
YTA
It’s amazing how your younger brother is more mature than you.
You’re not just an AH, you’re a cruel one. There was no need whatsoever for you to embarrass him like that. You’re a very jealous, sad little boy yourself it seems.