AITA for giving a 17 yr old a game for adults?

r/

In May of this year, I went to the high school graduation party of a cousin (M17). I gave him money, but I also like to include a little gift when I give cash. So I gave him this game I found online.

At some point during the party, he and the other kids in attendance (the youngest being 14) started to play the game. They were laughing loudly and seemed to be having a great time. The mom of the graduate went over to see what was so funny and became enraged. She gathered up the game from the kids and threw it in the garbage. Then she turned on me and said something to the effect of how dare I bring this filth into her home and how inappropriate it was to give the game to children. I apologized and left shortly after.

The game was listed as 18 and above. The graduate turned 18 in the summer so I thought it was ok. Now it’s months later and I’m being excluded from family functions. For example, there is a baptism and I wasn’t invited. I asked some other family members and they said it was because of my gift.

For reference, the game is called “SPIN! The hilarious game of spinning ridiculous situations in your favor.” I play games like “Cards Against Humanity” and “New Phone Who Dis” all the time and I didn’t think this game was nearly as dirty as the others. While I know that part of the family is religious, I didn’t know they were that sensitive. I feel bad about the 14 year old playing the game, but the box clearly states the age recommendation.

So AITA for giving this gift? If so, is there anything I can do at this point?

Comments

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    In May of this year, I went to the high school graduation party of a cousin (M17). I gave him money, but I also like to include a little gift when I give cash. So I gave him this game I found online.

    At some point during the party, he and the other kids in attendance (the youngest being 14) started to play the game. They were laughing loudly and seemed to be having a great time. The mom of the graduate went over to see what was so funny and became enraged. She gathered up the game from the kids and threw it in the garbage. Then she turned on me and said something to the effect of how dare I bring this filth into her home and how inappropriate it was to give the game to children. I apologized and left shortly after.

    The game was listed as 18 and above. The graduate turned 18 in the summer so I thought it was ok. Now it’s months later and I’m being excluded from family functions. For example, there is a baptism and I wasn’t invited. I asked some other family members and they said it was because of my gift.

    For reference, the game is called “SPIN! The hilarious game of spinning ridiculous situations in your favor.” I play games like “Cards Against Humanity” and “New Phone Who Dis” all the time and I didn’t think this game was nearly as dirty as the others. While I know that part of the family is religious, I didn’t know they were that sensitive. I feel bad about the 14 year old playing the game, but the box clearly states the age recommendation.

    So AITA for giving this gift? If so, is there anything I can do at this point?

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    > I gave a game that clearly stated it is recommended for 18 and above to a 17 year old.

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  3. JupiterSWarrior Avatar

    17 (or that close to 18) should be mature enough for an adult game like that. I’m going to say NTA.

  4. Intelligent_Car_4438 Avatar

    NTA. Stay in touch with the cousins, the mum and any who agree with her can get wrecked

  5. MiaouMiaou27 Avatar

    YTA. Firstly, the recipient isn’t even 18 yet. Secondly, of course the kids started playing the game. You brought it to the party, so they assumed it was fine. What did you think would happen?

    Here are some cards from the game I found online. Which parts sound appropriate for teenagers in your family?

    >Your priest asks what you’d like to confess. You share you;ve been publishing fantasy porn featuring members of the congregation…

    >

    >The madam of an exclusive escort service was just busted. You’re on a leaked video of her clients wearing nothing but a unicorn horn…

    >

    >You’re in a polygamous relationship. You would like to add another sister wife, but your wives argue that instead they would like a brother husband since you aren’t meeting their needs…

  6. iwitch-plus Avatar

    I’m gonna say NTA but also maybe read the room? When I read “baptism” I wondered if these are really religious and stuffy parents, and if they are and you know that, then yeah probably not the best time to give that gift. Yikes! The best you can do is apologize but if your family is like that then….good luck.

  7. eeemf Avatar

    NTA, playing a lighthearted video game won’t kill them.

  8. twirlywhirlygiirly Avatar

    NTA. You gave a graduation gift that was clearly labeled for older teens/adults, not a pack of cigarettes. At worst, it was a slight miscalculation, but not a crime worthy of family exile.

  9. Auspicious_BayRum Avatar

    NTA – In most households this would have been fine, but hyper-religious parents are prone to being dense and acting extreme. Just make sure in the future you also consider the gift recipient’s home situation before gifting them something that would inflame their situation.

    My heart goes out to the kid, being that I myself came from a somewhat similar religious background. He must have been really embarrassed by the scene his mother made.

  10. HowlPen Avatar

    NTA You, a cousin, gave cash and a game the new grad could play with other college-aged friends. Nothing inappropriate there. My guess is that your aunt responded like she did because she felt embarrassed. Teens were exposed to risqué content at her party! And now she’s piling on by not inviting you to family events. You aren’t the a-h, but if you are looking to mend fences you could text her and let her know you didn’t know the game has that content and just picked it randomly. 

  11. QuinnavereVonQuille Avatar

    I don’t think you’re an AH for giving him the game. But you should have talked to his mom before getting a game like that. A lot of those games have really raunchy and dirty content. And since there were kids there younger than 18, it wasn’t appropriate for them to be playing at the party. Also, a lot of adults don’t want to be around that kind of material.

  12. Top-Butterfly-9582 Avatar

    NTA – maybe you should have stopped it from being played by younger children, but I’m sure they have heard and seen much worse. The parents suck because they completely overreacted to a gift to their grown child. They need to let go of the idea that he is a kid. It will be difficult but they need to realize that since he is out of high school and about to be 18, he can make his own choices.

    Is there anything you can do? Say you are sorry that the younger kid played the game and that they found it offensive, you do not know the exact contents but thought he may enjoy it now that he is an “adult”. It’s an apology yet not an apology. It could work, and if it doesn’t then you are just going to have deal.

  13. Emergency-Life-8538 Avatar

    Nta. But, her house, her kid, her rules.

  14. COOLjng576 Avatar

    It took some searching but I found the game on Amazon, and saw this very helpful review,

    “This review is for The Hilarious Game of Spinning Ridiculous situations in Your Favor.

    The Good: Fun, quick games, definitely 18+, good quality cards and spinners – worth the money.

    The Bad: NOT for the under 18 crowd.

    The Ugly: Nothing, it’s a fun game.

    The Long Review: The game is fun, funny, and the rules are easy to learn. I would definitely say this is a game that is 18+ ONLY, even if you choose just the more “family friendly cards”, as it is a game that rewards you for basically lying in a convincing (or comical) way. Kids lie often enough on their own, we don’t need to help teach them how to do it better. 🙂
    That being said, it’s a fun, moderate-paced game that can create some outrageous nonsense, which is most of the fun right there.
    The construction of everything is simple but sturdy, everything works out of the box, but more importantly, the box itself is small, so it’s a breeze to throw into your sling bag, purse or whatever and take along. The print is easy to read, and the cards feel like decent quality that might actually hold up to a fair amount of shuffling.

    Final Thoughts: It’s a fun game, but it’s an ADULT game. Don’t mistaken it for a family-friendly game.”

    I think it would have been better if you told him to wait to play when he gets to college as this review states it’s not even good for kids if you do take the naughty cards out, but you can’t protect kids from everything. NTA, I think it was just embarrassing for your aunt and that was why she reacted so strongly. I think she should’ve just given it back rather than throw it away.

  15. AnnoraxGames Avatar

    NTA – That game isn’t sexually explicit or anything along those lines, it really is exactly what the players make of it, kind of like an open world card game. You couldn’t anticipate either Mom overreacting or cousin taking it in directions Mom would disapprove of.

  16. grove_tower Avatar

    NTA, she threw SPIN in the trash and overreacted.

  17. jmpeep Avatar

    You will always be remembered as the cool Aunt, dont worry about the old bags! The kids were having a blast.. the Mother was just pissed cause she could never make kid laugh like that🫠🫠

  18. Zestyclose_Low_6459 Avatar

    YTA. but only just.

    Until they’re 18 you’ve got to respect the parents.

    I get it’s not a big deal but follow this to its logical conclusion and you’re not only an AH but a criminal.

  19. xHey_All_You_Peoplex Avatar

    NTA but considering there were a 14 year old playing, it might’ve got blown out of proportion. But everyone’s family is different. I started watching R rated movies, shows like robot chicken, family guy, South Park at like 13, and my parents brought me GTA and other MA games, and didn’t give a fuck. Meanwhile I had a cousin that wasn’t allowed to watch Harry Potter or SpongeBob or the Grimm Adventures of Billy and Mandy so ymmv.

  20. Gertrude_D Avatar

    ESH

    After reading the reviews in a post below saying it’s definitely an adult only game, yeah, you might have screwed up a bit. Basically by not warning the graduate that it was for adults only and perhaps not to break it out immediately.

    Your aunt sucks more because that should not have gone in the trash – that was disrespectful of her. She wasn’t wrong to feel you were the one to blame for bringing it and it getting into the hands of a 14 year old. Excluding you from family gatherings is an obvious over-reaction.

    But yeah, you should have known what the game was and given an adequate heads up or given it to him to open later so people wouldn’t be over his shoulder wondering about it.

  21. Rubric_Golf Avatar

    YTA. I don’t really get how you thought it would be appropriate for you to get an adult gift for your 17 year old cousin.

    You clearly didn’t do your research on it and are looking for validation for your error. You knew that family was religious, so why would you think this would be an acceptable gift in the first place?

    It’s fine that you made a mistake. Just apologize and own up to it. That’s all you can do at this point.