So basically, I’m 17f and I recently graduated high school. My dad is fairly high up in this company and wants me to get a feel for what his work is like, but also wants me to work as well. So he has me as the maid at his office. I’m a bit shy generally, but i don’t mind it overall. Recently he had to take care of some stuff out of the office and was gone for about two hours. When he got back, I hurried up and hugged him, and I guess someone who didn’t know me saw and assumed I wasn’t his daughter and it was scandalous. It all got cleared up, but a few folks were on both his and my back for a little and it was intimidating and felt like it was my fault.
I apologized to my dad, and he said it was fine, but I don’t feel like it was. Like I should’ve known better or asked or something. AITA?
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So basically, I’m 17f and I recently graduated high school. My dad is fairly high up in this company and wants me to get a feel for what his work is like, but also wants me to work as well. So he has me as the maid at his office. I’m a bit shy generally, but i don’t mind it overall. Recently he had to take care of some stuff out of the office and was gone for about two hours. When he got back, I hurried up and hugged him, and I guess someone who didn’t know me saw and assumed I wasn’t his daughter and it was scandalous. It all got cleared up, but a few folks were on both his and my back for a little and it was intimidating and felt like it was my fault.
I apologized to my dad, and he said it was fine, but I don’t feel like it was. Like I should’ve known better or asked or something. AITA?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> (1) Hugging my dad. (2) It might have been unprofessional in a way that I should have known better.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA.
sorry you even feel to ask this. life is about learning. you weren’t familiar with the workplace etiquette, and that’s okay. generally, any physical contact is off-limits, even for known romantic partners.
NAH
This is one of those things that you are allowed to screw up once. No one should expect a 17 year old to know professional etiquette. But now you know. So, if it happens again, only then would you be an AH.
NTA
-but I do find it weird the he has you as a “maid” –
NTA you made a mistake, but also so did your dad but not explaining how to navigate more professional situations. But mistakes for either of you don’t make you TA. I would’ve gone with NAH except for the few folks who were on both his and your back for a while, how difficult is that situation to understand and just move on?? That’s obnoxious on their part.
You are 17, still a baby. There’s a lot you’re still learning. As someone twice your age, I can see how to a stranger an executive hugging a very young looking maid could be read as inappropriate, but that’s not your fault. You were just hugging your dad. Your dad isn’t upset with you. If this did go further, he can easily prove that you’re his kid. So it’s not really a big deal at all. Good luck with your job! NTA
NTA – imagine being a grown ass adult offended by a teenager hugging her own dad.
NTA.
If hugging your loved ones is wrong, id rather be wrong. Can never be sure when the last hug will come, so take as many as you can.
Life lessons.
You are responsible for what you do but not for what others see.
Think before handing out your apologies. Say sorry only if you actually made a mistake, not if someone became upset.
If you feel you must, give them the gold ‘I am sorry you got upset’ – the good ‘You are to fragile or stupid to deal with reality but here is something with the word sorry in it so you will think it is an apology’ – apology.
Nta. Ppl find negativity in anything
NTA, of course you can hug your dad. Some people just can’t get out of their own sick little minds to ask questions before making assumptions.
NAH
It was a simple misunderstanding and it has been resolved with no harm to anyone. I presume you can see how it could be worrying to a bystander that didn’t know beforehand that you were hugging your father, though, yes?
You’ve now learned that such displays of affection in the workplace can be misunderstood, and you can go forward with that knowledge. Everyone wins.
NTA you hugged a family member, there’s literally nothing wrong with that (as long as you aren’t like Tom Brady and his son… ick). If people know you’re his daughter now, that should have cleared up any misunderstandings. Anyone still making a fuss about it is the problem, not you.
Im a 36 year old male and i hug and kiss my mom and dad on the cheek because they wont be around forever and i want to forever remember the love that i feel for them and their love for me. Fuck people, love the ones you got because tomorrow isnt guaranteed.
Torn from the pages of the book “Stories That Never Happened”
Companies don’t hire “maids”, and if he is “fairly high up” then everyone would know that you’re his daughter. Grow up.
NAH
You’re just hugging your dad so there really isn’t any way you’re an AH here. You just didn’t understand the way that could be perceived from people that don’t know he’s your dad.
Being a father myself of 4 daughters from 18-29, I see the looks people give when one of them hugs me in public. They assume it’s something completely different than it actually is. In fact I can’t even count the amount of times people assume the oldest is either my wife or my affair partner. I can tell you people are more likely to think that than think she’s my daughter.
No way this is real.
NTA, because you didn’t know.
AND, you’ll learn more being around there if they DON’T know you’re his daughter. Nobody wants to talk if they think the boss is listening to their conversations.
At home, it’s Dad.
At work, it’s Mr. Smith.
NTA. He’s my father/She’s my daughter should have sufficed for everyone to shut the fuck up.
Once ppl were informed that you’re his daughter the weirdness immediately went away. You’re good.