My wife (40f) had some quirks when it comes to rules, they irritate her to the point that she will go out of her way to break them. When she checks out at the self checkout, she doesn’t completely empty the basket before putting grocery bags back in, leading to confusion of “did we scan this or not”. Last week this led to a theft of a jar of pickles. The way she checks out attracts the employees attention, and it makes me uncomfortable. We have been married for 15 years and this not a new problem. So today she put a squash and zucchini in the same produce bag ( she does this all the time) and I sweetly remind her she should weigh them separately. She asks me how much i care. After leaving the store I tell her how uncomfortable it makes me that she feel the need to break the rules so much that she steals. She says the employees don’t give a fuck. We got into an argument and she told me too ask reddit, so here I am. Am I the asshole?
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My wife (40f) had some quirks when it comes to rules, they irritate her to the point that she will go out of her way to break them. When she checks out at the self checkout, she doesn’t completely empty the basket before putting grocery bags back in, leading to confusion of “did we scan this or not”. Last week this led to a theft of a jar of pickles. The way she checks out attracts the employees attention, and it makes me uncomfortable. We have been married for 15 years and this not a new problem. So today she put a squash and zucchini in the same produce bag ( she does this all the time) and I sweetly remind her she should weigh them separately. She asks me how much i care. After leaving the store I tell her how uncomfortable it makes me that she feel the need to break the rules so much that she steals. She says the employees don’t give a fuck. We got into an argument and she told me too ask reddit, so here I am. Am I the asshole?
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> I may be the asshole because of how upset and argumentative i get when she won’t follow the rules. This may make me the asshole of it doesn’t align with social norms.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA. Your wife sounds immature and is behaving in a way that is inconsiderate of your feelings. Even if she disagrees with you, it’s a reasonable ask for her to change this small behavior. I really don’t know why it’s such a difficult thing for her to do.
NTA
Regardless of her beliefs regarding this being stealing or not, she is doing this knowing full well it makes you uncomfortable. Even if she doesn’t respect the store, this shows that she doesn’t respect you, either. And for nothing more than a juvenile aversion to anyone telling her what to do, even if it makes perfect sense.
NTA. I wouldn’t shop with her at all after that.
Let me help with her word choice….they don’t give a f until they do
NTA. Also, I’m not a mental health professional, but if this behavior is a trend that manifests in other aspects of your life, your wife may have Oppositional Defiance Disorder.
NTA. The employees do give a fuck and are held responsible for inventories and financials.
They are watching your wife and when the grand total is high enough to make the legal work simple, they’ll arrest her.
NTA. Advice: you can’t force her to follow rules but you can say you refuse to go shopping with her since her behavior makes you uncomfortable. You guys can divide the grocery runs and do 50/50 but separately
NTA. Don’t shop with her anymore. One day she’s going to FAFO, and you don’t want to be there when that happens.
Hmmm. “My wife has issues with boundaries, and when i try to set a boundary she doesn’t seem to care”. NTA, but also probably shouldn’t be that surprising.
Not Medical Advice but this sounds like some form of antisocial disorder. You may want to seek advice from the mental health practitioner of your choice.
I’m really not understanding her point tbh, OP — If she wanted the thrill but to not attract employees’ attention and respect you, she could at least pretend to scan the items.
I don’t understand how she doesn’t see how blatantly obvious it is when she is leaving stuff in the cart at checkout? Especially nowadays when employees are literally tasked with immediately checking receipts as soon as you try to leave.
I feel like this takes away any good thrill that stealing could provide. I don’t think going to jail for stealing groceries is worthwhile to begin with 😭.
NTA dude she’s gonna get you arrested, too. And sorry, but if her “quirk” is that rules bother her so much, how is it she can be trusted to follow literally any basic boundary? Is she taking the same approach to your finances, daily life, your very relationship?
Literal children learn to follow rules without any issue or argument. It’s not hard. Your 40-year-old wife can learn to do the same, and if it’s that hard, she needs therapy.
And just because rule-breaking doesn’t affect her immediately, doesn’t mean it’s not affecting other people. Employees can and do get in trouble regarding missing inventory, people who are just trying to do their jobs and make a living. Like come on, grow up and think outside of yourself for a moment.
NTA People like her cause higher prices.
NTA. Eventually, she’s gonna get stopped by Loss Prevention and probably banned – she’s definitely on their radar, especially if she’s so blatant. You’re the only one who can decide how much of an issue that is for you.
NTA. I would refuse to go shopping with her so that when (not if) she is confronted and caught, you aren’t blamed.
NTA, and depending on where you shop, the employees may not care for a reason. Some places keep track of thefts like this, if it’s a small thing once it doesn’t hurt them, but if someone starts to show a pattern they’ll keep track and press charges once you’ve stolen enough for it to be serious. Your wife should absolutely stop while she’s ahead
NTA. By the way, this approach is a common one employed by people who steal and want plausability deniability. She’s not being quirky or cute or distracted. She’s stealingstealing.
NTA. The employees are secretly judging at least I would be.
Lost preventions is most likely waiting until she hits a large total to pressure charges. I’d quit shopping with her.
NTA don’t shop with her anymore. Period. And when the day comes that the store has her arrested and she’s calling you from a holding cell, don’t rush to help her. Treat her like the child she’s acting like and let her sit and think about it for a bit.
Is she doing this because she “enjoys” the thrill of the action? Or is she doing it to make you feel uncomfortable.
There is a limit what how much she can do that without getting caught.
I know it’s not correct but from where I come from, some stores have a wall of shame: photos of people who shoplifted.
Edit: NTA but you know who is in this situation.
” I sweetly remind” Bad bot, bad!
NTA. As an employee of a business I find your wife’s behaviour to be disgraceful and embarrassing. It’s one thing if you’re stealing food you need to live but this just sounds like she’s doing it just to be an ass. I would also be embarrassed by your wife’s behaviour and she should be embarrassed as well. Trashy.
She’s a thief pure and simple. You’re NTA. I’d flag her everytime she does it and loudly. Doesn’t sound like she has much of a moral compass tbh.
Your wife is a thief. Either don’t shop with her, or you do the scanning. SITA.
NTA. Rat her out, let het face some consequences. Let her find out what happens when police get involved in her “victimless crimes”.
FFS! She’s 40 and thinks stealing isn’t a problem?? Putting aside your conscientious approach, what she’s doing is THEFT! Whether a jar of pickles or a higher cost produce item; whether it’s a national chain or a local mom-and-pop, what she’s committing is THEFT!
You are NTA by any stretch. I suggest next time she pulls her ‘stunt’, make sure you have the car keys in your hand. Take your entire order and receipt to customer service and explain that SHE “may” have forgotten to scan an item or two. And if you routinely take her for shopping trips, repeat the process until the stores insist she can no longer do self-scan.
Maybe some public humiliation will knock the smirk from her face and attitude.
She is a thief! Yuck!
When it’s time to scan/check out, just walk away. Wait in the car.
NTA, don’t go shopping with her anymore. You’ll go down with her when she gets caught.
She’s the asshole. That’s a weird thing to do
NTA
Man, I recently truly and accidentally bagged an item before I scanned it (because I forgot to open the plastic bag and so I used one hand to open the bag and had the item in the other and just went autopilot) and the self checkout dinged me right away and it wouldn’t let me fix my mistake until an employee came over. I was so embarrassed when the employee came over and I told them it was an accident and they said they had to watch me scan the item. I walked out after paying for everything thinking how TF do people steal on purpose when I can’t even get away with a true accident? I can’t imagine doing it on purpose and feeling good about it.
She may think the employees don’t care but I guarantee you they are racking up a case on her the more she does this the higher that theft charge is going to be NTA
Tell her to do this at target
NTA. But the squash/zucchini thing isn’t the issue, it’s the way she scans.
She’s right that the squash/zucchini thing doesn’t matter (they’re usually the same price) but the jar of pickles, and whatever else she “forgets” to scan is stealing.
I mean fuck them big corporations but it’s usually the community and the employees who pay, not Nestle/Kroger/Bill Gates’ prison labor farm company.
NTA
You should be doing a lot more than “feeling uncomfortable” that your wife is a common thief, plain and simple.
NTA though.
I doubt the employees care very much and it’s “just” a vegetable but to me it says a lot about who she is as a person tbh
NTA. Your wife is stealing, plain and simple. Also, why would she keep doing something that you have repeatedly told her makes you uncomfortable? Does she not give a crap about how you feel?
YTA cmon bro grow a pair
NTA
Not okay. I once found a can of $0.50 green beans that were hidden by my water bottle.
I went back to the store, let them know what happened and paid for the can.
Your wife sucks OP. NTA
You’re wife is a thief, you’re nta. She needs to grow up and stop acting 12
It does make me wonder how much she lets slip thru unpaid when you aren’t with her. I do think you need to protect yourself and insist on doing the checkout when shopping with your wife. If she insists on doing it herself then don’t shop with her.
nta but your wife is. What is her problem?
Your wife may be trying to save a buck. I think you most likely know what she is doing. How you talk
To her about it to stop the behavior is key. Good luck
NTA. “The rules don’t apply to me” is a bigger issue these days than it’s been before.
My husband did this once & I freaked out on him. I told him if he got me banned from our favorite store, I quirk be so pissed. If he still steals, he at least doesn’t tell me about it.
NTA. Let her shop on her own and let her get arrested for stealing, maybe she’ll learn to stop. Rules “irritating” her does not give someone an excuse to steal, it’s extremely petty and immature behavior. She needs to grow up at her big age
NTA. Where else and who else is she stealing from? If it comes easy to her, this isn’t the only place. Think about friends, family, other stores and places. Do not go anywhere with her. Sitting in the car makes you the getaway driver/co-conspirator.
NTA
Does your wife exhibit other cluster B personality type traits?
It’s not stealing if it’s something you need. Nobody pays for everything.
Leave it alone. She might have committed a crime of passion, and she wouldn’t survive a day in prison. Tell the store to stop selling
batteriessquash.(reference too easy, NTA regardless)
I don’t support what your wife is doing, but I loathe self checkouts. Why should it be my job to make sure I’m paying the store exactly what it’s owed, that’s their job to ring up my order and bill me accordingly.
I’ve had an item that didn’t scan before, and nobody around to help me enter it, so I just took it. If they don’t like it they can have someone ring it in for me.
I mean, sometimes I claim I used zero bags when I actually used one but that’s as far as I go. I’d say what she’s doing is not good.
I’m with you until you mention separating squash and zucchini because aren’t they the same thing? I think summer squash and zucchini are typically the same price per weight, because they’re different varieties of the same thing. But maybe your store is different. Or do you mean like a butternut squash and she’s ringing it up as a zucchini?
Anyway you’re obviously nta BUT I think that example of not separating produce is extremely different than not scanning an item all together. I think you should do the grocery shopping or you should handle the checkout process.
NTA. The employees may not care, but that doesn’t make it right. And if she’s accidentally not paying for things, her system of leaving things in the cart isn’t working. Or, she’s trying to steal and it’s working as intended.
Regarding the veggies in one bag, it sounds like maybe you two should grocery shop separately. I’m not sure how differently priced squash and zucchini are, but it probably is similar enough that the store isn’t gonna go bankrupt as long as you pay for the whole weight as one or the other. I wouldn’t do what she’s doing there, either, though.
I would not want to be married to anyone like your wife. I’m pretty much a rule follower & her behavior would piss me off.
You need to stop going with your wife when she is stealing. You will be charged with her when she finally gets caught. Lots of stores simply keep a running tally and wait till the amount is large enough to hit more serious charges. Save yourself.
NTA… these things can cause big consequences that would affect the entire family. She needs to knock it off
Just because the cashiers don’t care doesn’t mean the loss prevention people aren’t watching and taking notes.
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She’s a kleptomaniac.
Sounds like she’s collecting her paycheck in the form of produce to compensate for checking herself out.
NTA. As a grocery store employee, your wife sucks and makes our jobs harder. Does she think I want to enforce silly little nitpicky rules? Because I don’t, I just want to keep my job. Another part of that job is ensuring all items in carts get scanned. Fuck she sounds insufferable.
NTA. Your wife is a thief. But when stores started putting self checkouts in they knew that they were making thefts like this easier. They decided it was worth the loss of product for the amount they save in not staffing registers. If they trust her to run the register then they get what they asked for.
NTA. That is theft and it would be good to consult a mental health professional, since it’s repeated behavior.
NTA. She probably thinks she’s “quirky” when in reality everyone else finds her tiresome and pathetic.
NTA, but Ngl depending on the store I am on team wife. Not because of her issues but because I am poor. More likely than not I won’t actually use produce bags.
Your wife is a thief. No matter how she spins it or what excuse she gives, she is a thief. Rules aren’t made to be broken, they are made to protect. I’m not an angel either, but I don’t steal.
Maybe the store should have done a better job training her if they wanted her to do a good job as a cashier?
Your wife’s oppositional defiance is likely to land her in some actual trouble one day. I don’t think you’re wrong for calling her out. Does she feel the same way about rules of the road? What about keeping a dog leashed, or smoking on public transportation? Does she think those are useless rules too?
NTA. Your wife might need professional help.
I’d let her shop alone, leave you out of it when she gets caught stealing
NTA
NTA – she needs to grow up. Being rebellious and breaking rules because they are “annoying” might be fine when you’re 16 but she is freaking 40.
The employees are documenting her thefts and waiting until they add up to enough to justify a felony charge.
Your wife is a bad person.
I watch a lot of videos on YouTube that remind me of the theft ones. People try so hard to act innocent and dumb when they’re caught and what I’ve learned from the videos is that there’s always a person watching it happen.
Your wife ITA
NTA
Honestly they’re probably just building a big enough case before they bust her
She is stealing. That makes groceries more expensive. NTA. Y T A to yourself and the store.
Yeah no. NTA. Don’t go anywhere with her anymore. Just because you’re married doesn’t mean you need to co-sign your wife’s antisocial AH behavior by being her plus one on the Petty Charge Express.
You’re not an AH, but she’s a minor level thief.
When my kids were older teenagers, I explained that there are rules, laws. And if you choose to break them, make sure you know the possible consequences before you break them. Talking about driving a bit over the speed limit, having a beer before you are 21. Your wife is setting herself up for a wakeup call one of these days.
NTA she’s the reason stock numbers are off. it makes it hard to order when you don’t what you have and then people complain as the store is out of something. she sucks
Don’t go to the store with her. Her luck of not getting caught will run out and you will be arrested as an accomplice. NTA
Nta but she is playing a very weird and slightly dangerous game
Your wife is being selfish not addressing your concerns you’ve told her over and over. She should see a therapist to find out why she does this and how to stop. It’s behavior that can and will get worse over time.
People like her are why the prices go up.
The more that is lost in theft the more shops raise prices and cut the amount of workers.
As someone who spent nearly 30yrs in retail I would never shop with your wife. At the least she may be banned from the store. Worst she will be arrested and charged depending on the cost.
NTA. Your wife if a thief and she knows it. How you respond to this is another matter.
This is classic entitlement. “Oh, it’s such a small thing, who really cares?” It’s not about how big or small the thing is. It’s about what is or is not acceptable behavior. Tell your wife to be a fucking adult and behave like one.
You are wildly incompatible in this particular scenario. If the rest of your relationship is excellent, I advise that you stop shopping together.
Jesus. She needs therapy.
Self integrity. A good thing to have.
NTA While the employees don’t care, they aren’t the ones watching the cameras.
You’re uncomfortable with theft which is normal.
INFO: which store? Is it Whole Foods?
YTA. I’m on the wife’s side here. I ain’t no corporate shill.
She’s being a thief. Period.
NTA. Her entitled behavior is the reason all self checkouts have those unflattering cameras!
If the employees are watching her it’s because they are documenting. They won’t say a word until she’s “accidentally” left without paying for items worth enough to charge her. And they will charge her and ban her from shopping there.
NTA. That’s some shady ish. Someday she’s going to miscalculate and get in trouble. I suggest you stop going to the store with her so you don’t get caught in the crossfire.
Let her check out by herself. If she gets caught, she gets caught. Let her spend the night on ice.
One time, like 10 years ago, I did self checkout, and when I got to my car, I noticed a box of Wheat Thins I didn’t pay for.
I went back in, and the cashier was like, “Are you crazy? Just go.
She’s right that they don’t care, but she totally aware of what she’s doing so that’s a big problem. An occasional accident is understandable, but she’s gonna get banned from the store or arrested if she keeps it up.
Ugh, your wife sounds insufferable. Hey, OP’s wife, stop stealing shit and grow up. Rules are in place for a reason, you should feel lucky there are so many people who follow the rules and we don’t live in some ‘The Purge’ like wasteland where people do whatever the fuck they want. And if the way you use the self checkout makes the employees take notice, OBVIOUSLY THEY CARE. OP, NTA. Wife, very much the asshole.
NTA
Doesn’t matter if the employees care or not. She’s stealing without any compelling moral reason to do so. She’s a shoplifter, plain and simple. I’d simply tell her I’m not going to go through a self-checkout with her if she isn’t willing to be honest.
A lot of those self checkouts have cameras. She’s going to get caught and it’s going to be embarrassing.
Nta. Just make sure you walk away when she gets caught and say see, lmao. 15 yrs I’m on 30, that’s how that would work with my wife telling me not to do something. lmao
NTA, but your wife is. Just check out like a normal human; there is no need to ‘put one over’ on the store because she doesn’t like the (well established) rules. She sounds exhausting. Also, ‘quirks’ aren’t cute or funny. Tell her to stop it.
These aren’t quirks. She’s just blatant stealing and she knows it.. If she made a mistake she’d be mortified. Also who tf puts two different items and weighs them together?
If this was a year ago, I’d say you’re overreacting.
But if you’re in America, this is a fascist hellscape now.
Any infraction can turn into a nightmare.
So her stealing can turn into her getting arrested and depending on her attitude, you might be going home from the grocery store alone.
If you care why don’t you just make the list and go shopping?
NTA You will have a real problem when the grocery store decides to arrest her. Maybe then she will get help for these impulses, as this sounds psychological.
NTA and I know for a fact that somewhere in her life she’s getting her karma every time she knowingly does some shit she’s not supposed to.
YTA
Oh no walmart will desperately miss the 5c they lost from her weighing squash and zucchini in the same bag🙄
NTA. Even when I was homeless I didn’t steal food. It’s about inner integrity. Honestly, if it were me, I’d tell her this behavior stops or we can’t go shopping at the same time. Also, just simply how little she cares about your feelings is even more serious. Its not punk rock to be dismissive of your partners feelings “Nancy Spungen”.
NTA – you explained how it makes you uncomfortable AFTER reminding her various times before. What she does on her own time is “fine”, if she feels SUCH a desire to do so. But If she’s still okay doing this around you, as her accomplice so to speak, then you are definitely NTA here…
NTA and she is straight up stealing. I suggest that you not be in the store with her.
I worked in the pharmacy at Target and there was a lady who came in frequently to pick up them do some shopping. Come to find out, they had been watching her for months and had her arrested.
Just because she’s ‘getting away with it’ doesn’t necessarily mean she is. While they really might not be watching her, do you want to be around if they do?
NTA Your wife is a thief.
NTA.
Your wife is a shit person. Yeah, it’s small, but it shows her moral compass.
She is a thief. Don’t be an accomplice.
NTA. If it’s a big chain she’s fucked if she continues. Most bigger corporations actually keep track of common shoplifters. The create files documenting every item ever stolen and calculate the total. Once that total reaches your states felony level, for mine its $1000, they will detain her and have her arrested. They may even have facial recognition. Not to mention if you are always with her, there’s a chance you’ll catch an accessory charge at least, possibly felony as well.
It’s theft and it damages the end profit and in turn pay raises.
While I’m not opposed to taking a little from these big corporations if youre in need, your wife has to realize that when theft is high, its the employees that suffer, not the corp. If you can afford the food, please pay for it.
NTA. Your wife lacks morals. Have I ever realized, at some point, that I have mistakenly missed scanning something? Yes. Not on purpose.
Crazy for 40f and what will she teach her kids 😂
NAH
Yeah, that’s theft.
And… Yeah, sympathy for corporate profits isn’t a winning personal value in my mind.
YTA
Everyone should steal from corporations.
You’re NTA, she is.
In today’s climate… her rage against the machine moment is… checks notes petty shoplifting?
If you’re going to be a rule breaker do something functionally meaningful or fuck off. This is petulant child level bullshit.
NTA – but your partner needs to grow up and figure out why random sub $5 petty thievery is a hill to die on when it upsets their spouse.
YTA she is a resourceful queen minding the budget
Some businesses keep track of customers they suspect of theft and wait until it reaches dollar amounts that are criminal and then prosecute. Example the Target girl from a few years ago.
She’s right, in general. The employees don’t care. However, she’s very wrong for not caring about what makes you uncomfortable. In that, she’s definitely TA.
NTA. She is a kleptomaniac and needs therapy before she gets arrested for stealing zucchini and if you think the grocery store won’t press charges, you have your head in the sand.
What is wrong with your wife, dude? It doesn’t matter if the employees care or not, she’s doing the wrong things on purpose so she can sneak stuff through. This isn’t her “breaking the rules” like some middle-aged juvenile. She is purposely confusing the machine so she can get something at a massively reduced price or for free. The employees may not care, but the people paying even higher prices for items at the store will.
NTA, but your wife seriously is.
But self check out is the stealing section, what’s the problem? (50% /s)
Are you willing to pay bail, lawyer and court costs? If not, then you gotta go.
Self checkouts are a scam.The store used to pay people to do that work, now they make customers do it for them. For free. You don’t even get a discount for doing their work for them.
So if mistakes happen? Tough. That’s the cost of forcing untrained and unmotivated people to do the work the store should be paying employees for.
She’s stealing on purpose
Your wife is stealing….
I hope she gets caught
You are NTA
If she has serious issues with rules and authority, I wonder if something like oppositional defiance disorder might be at play . NTA – but if it is a mental health thing, it will most likely get worse if she doesn’t get some kind of treatment.
A married person who abhors rules so much that they go out of their way to break them???You sure your biggest problem is the squash and zucchini? 🤔 She sounds like a habitual line stepper who’ll be reaching next for an eggplant that don’t belong to her either.
OP you are NTA. Definitely not. Just don’t go shopping with her anymore and let her deal with the consequences. You know what she’s doing, so you are an accomplice.
In what other ways is she cheating society?
This will eventually bite her in the ass. Regular employees don’t care but loss prevention and managers likely do. She can check out by herself if she wants to keep playing that game.
NTA but she is, for a few reasons.
because it’s frustrating for employees to deal with those antics in linecwhen they’re just trying to push through
shrinkage ultimately makes all of us pay a lil more.
and most importantly, you asked her not to because it makes you very uncomfortable.
NTA but your wife is technically a criminal so ya perhaps taking 1 item is not going to be a huge deal even to the store but over time it does add up and in some places they do track that. Regardless if she steals from the grocery store where else does she steal from? Perhaps places where the impact is much more significant because she doesn’t like rules like a small business. It’s wrong and she’s wrong. The fact she doesn’t care it makes you uncomfortable makes it worse.
Edit to add- after reading other comments I think it’s hilarious she said take it to Reddit presumably thinking people would side with her and everybody is siding with OP. I wonder if she really will listen to OP now or have any self reflection or just continue her justification and blow everybody off like she did OP
NTA, stealing is bad, and from what I’ve read, these stores track people who steal and will bust them at some point.
I will say though, if I happen to notice that the squash and zucchini are the same price, I bag them together. 🤷🏻♂️
NTA we just bought an expensive coffee pot and a few other items. Because of the total the employee had to come over and check things before we paid. This was at Walmart. They are watching and she could get into trouble I just heard some grocery stores in my home city are actually closing because of excessive theft.
So you know your wife likes stealing and breaking rules… do you think she breaks her marriage vows? They’re “rules”, right? If she can be so casual about stealing, repeatedly, what’s stopping her from doing worse? NTA
nta – I work loss prevention for a grocery chain, I can’t speak for every company out there but when we catch shoplifting, people get a $250+ fine and a lifetime trespass from all of our stores. Every time she does this, she risks getting banned from wherever you shop – if regular employees notice it, i wouldn’t be surprised if the store manager was aware of the theft.
Ha ha! Nice try. YOU’RE the wife!
NTA, wife sounds off the rails
My ex liked to swap price tags. She couldn’t understand why I thought it was wrong.
NTA. Your wife is literally stealing groceries from a store, and I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s intentional because she resents you for telling her not to, and so she deliberately does it. If she doesn’t care at all about the fact that she’s stealing, and gets mad at you for telling her how you feel, then she needs to work on that.
NTA
I work for a store that has self check outs. We do care that people steal. We are just not allowed to say anything or do anything about it. We also judge you harshly for stealing. We just can’t tell you what we think about it without losing our jobs.
By all means, show this to your wife. This particular “employee” thinks she is a low-life, disgusting person for stealing just for the fun of it.
NTA, stealing is illegal and if she does it enough she could be arrested.
Here in Southern California they are eliminating a lot of the self check outs because of theft. It makes me sad because I like to use them.
I think the theft is more than pickles but it does add up. Personally, I would be too embarrassed to shop with your wife.
Good luck!
Your wife is the asshole in this situation. And and incredibly disrespectful one at that. Trade her in for a better one
She’s def stealing and she doesn’t need to. NTA, but she sure is.
your wife is annoying. my husband does this too. idc about him stealing. I like stealing from stores too every once in a while. but he’s so obvious and sloppy about it and it makes me uncomfortable.
NTA – I can sympathize with her as in my younger days I would do things like this because I also believed it wasn’t a big deal. However after growing up a bit and seeing police arrests of thefts I’ve now learned that if I got caught stealing I would not only be humiliated but also have a record for something stupid, I would then waste money and time dealing with the consequences, it just is not worth it. It’s childish thinking.
It can really screw up her future if she doesn’t change her behavior – many officers and loss prevention have a zero tolerance policy and don’t give a crapppp if it was just a zucchini either. They will prosecute to the full extent of the law.
NTA. Having seen someone in court arrested for stealing cat toys, employees do care, and stores care. Does she really want to be arrested for a jar of pickles.