AITA for kicking out my parents, in-laws and other family members after they started mocking the name I chose for my child?

r/

I (29F) am 24 weeks into my pregnancy, yesterday we had a family get together , while talking and catching up, FIL, asks me if have chosen any names yet, so I tell him I am still undecided, but I might name the baby Krishna if it’s a boy, at first everyone were impressed because it’s a very unique name, so I out of enthusiasm tell them it’s a very common Indian name, and that Krishna is God in Hindi, I’ve been reading the Gita the book written by Krishna and it inspired me a lot.

Suddenly they start giving me looks, my mom says “I can’t name my baby that”, others started agreeing, saying it’s weird, my MIL says that “they go to church and getting him baptised would be weird”
I say we will not get our baby baptised, she says that’s not my decision to make and looks at my husband, I love my husband so much, he always has my back, he says yeah its ours and that’s a no.

Things started to get heated, my in-laws and mom started berating me a lot, while my husband was arguing back, at this point I was crying a lot, my sister stayed neutral and tried to mediate.
My husband then got super angry and asked me if he can show them out, and I just nodded.

He asked everyone to leave, my mother refused but my sister made her leave.
Now, my phone’s all blowing up, that I disrespected my mom by kicking her out, and my In Laws (mostly MIL, FIL is also mostly neutral) are threatening to go no contact with my husband unless both of us apologise and not name our baby Krishna, so aita for refusing to apologie?

Comments

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    I (29F) am 24 weeks into my pregnancy, yesterday we had a family get together , while talking and catching up, FIL, asks me if have chosen any names yet, so I tell him I am still undecided, but I might name the baby Krishna if it’s a boy, at first everyone were impressed because it’s a very unique name, so I out of enthusiasm tell them it’s a very common Indian name, and that Krishna is God in Hindi, I’ve been reading the Gita the book written by Krishna and it inspired me a lot.

    Suddenly they start giving me looks, my mom says “I can’t name my baby that”, others started agreeing, saying it’s weird, my MIL says that “they go to church and getting him baptised would be weird”
    I say we will not get our baby baptised, she says that’s not my decision to make and looks at my husband, I love my husband so much, he always has my back, he says yeah its ours and that’s a no.

    Things started to get heated, my in-laws and mom started berating me a lot, while my husband was arguing back, at this point I was crying a lot, my sister stayed neutral and tried to mediate.
    My husband then got super angry and asked me if he can show them out, and I just nodded.

    He asked everyone to leave, my mother refused but my sister made her leave.
    Now, my phone’s all blowing up, that I disrespected my mom by kicking her out, and my In Laws (mostly MIL, FIL is also mostly neutral) are threatening to go no contact with my husband unless both of us apologise and not name our baby Krishna, so aita for refusing to apologie?

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    Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment.

    OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:

    > I made my husband kick my elderly mom and in laws out, it was done in a very rude way, my sister was also asked to leave, even though she didn’t do anything.
    I think I might be the asshole because they were guests at my place, we invited them and kicking them out doesn’t feel right, it’s against my principles of hospitality

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  3. Roarcat121 Avatar

    we need some context? what country are you in, what is your religion?

  4. SlappySlapsticker Avatar

    NTA for asking them to leave when things got heated, it’s reasonable as someone quite pregnant not to want the stress of a big family blow-up.

    Specifically to you thinking of calling your kid Krishna, are you Hindu or have an Indian heritage? While it’s a respectable name for Hindu/Indian heritage people I’m wondering if it might be a bit of cultural appropriation if you don’t have those backgrounds?

  5. Proper_Tax7369 Avatar

    I’m just saying you’re the idiot

  6. shontsu Avatar

    Sounds like your family care more about the church than they do you. Thats unfortunate.

    NTA.

  7. UsualInformal Avatar

    If you kicked your sister out, and she was trying to help you, yeah you’re TA. The rest of them, NTA.

  8. Vibe_me_pos Avatar

    Name him Krishna as his middle name too. Their behavior is ridiculous. They can’t forbid you to name your baby something, and your religious beliefs are none of your business. NTA

  9. Thatsaclevername Avatar

    YTA – Yes we should all strive to be civil as adults. But Krishna is a horrible name for a kid. Even worse you’re picking the name because you’re into the book -right now-. This isn’t some passing fad, this is a kids life that is going to have a heap of hardship thrown on top of it because you’re being dumb. When everyone in a room except two of you, including most of the people who raised you, is raising hell because of a dumb decision, you should consider their input STRONGLY.

  10. AlternativeDue1958 Avatar

    As I say quite frequently in AITAH posts: YOUR UTERUS, YOUR BABY, YOUR DECISION.

  11. WestLondonIsOursFFC Avatar

    It’s a godawful choice of name if you’re not Indian.

  12. bananaphone1549 Avatar

    NTA but it’s not a great idea to name your white midwestern son Krishna. It’s not your culture, it’s not his culture, and it’s you’re setting him up for a lifetime of problems

  13. hamdinger125 Avatar

    YTA for wanting to name your kid Krishna.

  14. lothartx_ffbe Avatar

    That’s like naming your kid Jesus or Muhammad if you were Buddist or Jewish. I mean you can, but why? Giving your child a name so central to a religion is going to cause a lot of confusion if it’s not the religion you are using to raise the child.

  15. Platypus_Neither Avatar

    Nah, I’m with them. Not for their bullshit religious reasons. Krishna for a white boy just doesn’t work, especially since you seemed to pick it in a whim from a random book you ate currently reading. It snot even a character you have known and admired for a long time, or even relate to. Bad choice of name.

  16. Proper_Tax7369 Avatar

    The name is not for you it’s for your newborn boy! I think you’re letting your ego getting in the way, I would important decision!, Your ego combine with an attempt an attempt to be spiritual, and a kitchen drawer, intellectual!
    Name selections for the child I’m not beautiful for your ego !
    You’re selfish and pigheaded!

  17. nycsafetyguy Avatar

    Your house…your rules

  18. slendermanismydad Avatar

    Enjoy your peace and your new baby. 

  19. OkGazelle5400 Avatar

    Are you just a random white person naming your kid a distinctively ethnic name?

  20. CrimsonKnight_004 Avatar

    NTA – They were being judgemental and trying to control you, acting like your husband could override all of your decisions like you have no input in your child’s upbringing. That was wrong of them.

    Since you are undecided, though, might I offer some insight? Since you are white and don’t have a cultural connection to Hinduism or India, your son might find this name difficult to live with. The name could sound feminine to English speakers for one, and it’ll just leave him with a lot of questions to answer the older he gets. Do you think this name could better suit him as a middle name? I understand liking it, I also love many names across cultures! It’s also just important to keep in mind that he is the one who will have to live with it.

  21. NaomiWish Avatar

    YTA for naming a white kid in Iowa Krishna. His name will last longer than your interest in a book. Holy lack of perspective. Are you sure you are almost 30?

  22. DustRhino Avatar

    I’m concerned that nobody in the room had ever heard the name Krishna before.

  23. KillBologna Avatar

    Neither because I understand it’s kind of a religious thing your in-laws don’t understand but think about how kids are ruthless at bullying. My suggestion is if you do call him that, use “chris”.

    I’m asian (Lao) and both of my brothers had a hard time because they didn’t have American names unlike me. Guess who had the least amount of resistance? Be wary of what you name your kid.

  24. AvocadoJazzlike3670 Avatar

    YTA a white woman from middle America and this is the name you choose. I find it offensive

  25. grae23 Avatar

    So as a non-religious white woman you’re going to name your child after a very important god to Hindus because you “like the character”.

    Disrespectful as hell. YTA

  26. InterestingChoice484 Avatar

    Yta. Don’t give your baby a religious name unless you’re part of that religion. This is cultural appropriation

  27. Ok_Illustrator5694 Avatar

    NTA for kicking people out. It is ultimately your choice and they didn’t need to act like that. Also extremely telling how they seemed to be good with it until you explained the origin, which makes them racist.

    However, like many have said do not name your child Krishna if this is not your culture. Not only because it could be appropriative but also – you don’t fully understand the cultural aspects of the name. Are there other considerations within the culture when using that name? Is the name going to be received as offensive to the culture rather than respectful or appreciative.

  28. Grouchy_Librarian343 Avatar

    NTA for asking them to leave since that whole thing was a mess.

    ESH on the name. Honestly I wouldn’t have said anything to you and just rolled my eyes when I left. It’s not a great name for a variety of reasons others have pointed out. Your kid is going to call themselves Kris as soon as he’s able to.

  29. KevinHartSucks Avatar

    No. Just no. Do not name a baby Krishna ffs.

  30. Kiss_the_Girl Avatar

    NTA, but I don’t think many children – or adults – want to be named after a god.

  31. kingtaytaybee Avatar

    Hate the name choice, but the moment they said getting the kid baptized isn’t your choice I would pushed them out the door.

  32. princess_banana_ Avatar

    YTA, that’s a terrible name for a white American kid.

  33. wisteria108108 Avatar

    I can’t believe some of the comments I’m reading. I’m generally a lurker but couldn’t resist chiming in. I’m both Hindu and Indian and certainly would not find you naming your child Krishna as offensive, irrespective of if you are culturally or religiously affiliated. You’re not doing anything to the name to change the meaning or create offense. Having read the Gita you understand the significance and meaning. You are lucky that you have a supportive husband. Ultimately it is up to the two of you to decide. Not your parents/ in-laws and not reddit. Wishing you the best.

  34. TheGreenPangolin Avatar

    NTA

    Look, Krishna is a weird name for a white kid in a christian country. It’s like naming him Muhammad or something. It’s just a bit odd. So I can understand their initial reaction. I had the same reaction (where I am, it’s common knowledge that Krishna is a Hindu god so it wouldn’t even initially pass as a unique name). It’s a name that means your kid will always be asked about their name which no one wants. 

    But getting heated enough that you ended up crying? No. That’s too much. They needed to leave and then have a more civil conversation about it when everyone was calmer.

  35. momstheuniverse Avatar

    Unfortunately YTA. Your kid will also be their own person one day and you are setting a white man up for failure naming him “Krishna” just because you read it in a book

  36. BakeCalm9657 Avatar

    NTA because even if they’ve got valid reasons for not thinking the name is a good idea, they need to either keep their opinion to themselves OR respectfully bring up their concerns and then back off when you say its your decision (because it is).

    I will say, though… maybe the name you picked out would be better as a middle name or a nickname? It’s a cool name, but it might give your potential son a lot of hardship in their life. My sister wanted to name her daughter Daenerys so badly, she loved the GoT character so much. Thank Goodness she didn’t lol Sometimes you don’t know until you know, you know? Lol

  37. Practical-Bird633 Avatar

    You’re a white couple from Iowa DO NOT name your baby this???

  38. Important-Nose3332 Avatar

    Wait, you’re not Indian and neither is your husband ?

    YTA.

    If you think that won’t cause issues for your kid in the future you’re not thinking critically.

  39. Syric13 Avatar

    YTA

    Yeah don’t name your kid that. You are setting him up for a lifetime of odd stares and people questioning everything about him.

    Like I can’t believe how incredibly dense you are. You don’t see an issue with taking a name from a major religion and culture you aren’t a part of and naming your kid because you…like the author’s name from a book you read?

    My god the cultural appropriation here is off the charts.

    Your kid will hate you as you grow up. Go listen to Boy Named Sue by Johnny Cash. It’ll be like that but 10x worse.

  40. batjac7 Avatar

    It is weird

  41. Zealousideal-World71 Avatar

    NTA for kicking them out, but I highly recommend you think long and hard about what you name your future son/daughter. There’s nothing wrong with the name, but it’s very strange to pick a name so strongly tied to a specific culture or religion that you are not a part of.

  42. NarrowCook8 Avatar

    A white family in Iowa wants to name their baby boy a VERY distinctive (feminine sounding) Indian name????

    Please tell me this is an April Fools Day joke

  43. ConsitutionalHistory Avatar

    Your child will grow up resenting the curse you’ve placed on him

  44. SafeWord9999 Avatar

    Let them go no contact cos the only ones missing out on the baby will be THEM

    Also who yells at a pregnant lady

  45. Bottom_of_the_bottle Avatar

    That’s going to be a VERY rough childhood for a white boy in Iowa named Krishna.

  46. thirdelevator Avatar

    YTA, your family is right and you should really choose a name that’s not so central to a culture that you have no actual connection to.

  47. guitarguywh89 Avatar

    At least the first letters spell Kris, a normal name he can go by when he gets picked on for his real name

    NTA for kicking them out once things got heated but cmon

  48. LavishnessGeneral Avatar

    NTA For kicking them out. Giving your kid the name of a god is normally done as a sign of respect for that God, are you Hindii? If not, then strong YTA for that part.

  49. No_Newt_8293 Avatar

    I wish y’all would stop telling people your baby names, let it be a surprise, just say I haven’t decided yet

  50. Acrobatic_Hippo_9593 Avatar

    You’re a white Christian from Iowa, you want to name your baby after a Hindu deity, and you can’t understand why your family is flipping out?

    What else is on your name list? Jehovah? Jesus? Allah? Yahweh? God? Muhammad?

    Can you not grasp the world of hurt you will be unleashing on your child (from embarrassment to bullying and a plethora of other things) by naming him after a deity from a religion you do not practice and a culture you are not part of?

    You’re not an AH for asking them to leave, but you will absolutely be one if you name your son Krishna.

  51. my-coffee-needs-me Avatar

    YTA. You’re setting your kid up for a lifetime of teasing, mockery, and bullshit. Children are not fashion accessories. Name him something more culturally appropriate for a white kid in Iowa. Get a cat or dog and name the pet Krishna. FFS.

  52. Wren9878 Avatar

    No your not the arsehole. It’s you and your husbands choice what you name your baby. Also, I thought it was really odd that they said it wasn’t your choice about the baby not being baptised and looked at your husband. Like it’s for the man to make decisions. Am I missing something? Like I get making the decision together but it was like you couldn’t make decisions and your husband could? Also just to say name your child whatever you want and please don’t listen to what people on here or anywhere else say. I’m a white female and my name is Wren. Lots of people tell me that it is a beautiful, pretty name and others screw their faces up at it, say ‘that’s a nice idea’ and tell me I ‘must have been bullied a lot as a child for having a name like that’. Frankly, I don’t give give a shit because I love my name and who gave it to me.

  53. ihadone Avatar

    NTA for kicking them out after they disrespected you. However no matter what your intentions are, that name has religious connotations and your child will be measured by that regardless of whether or not you are Hindi. It comes with the name, and you seem to be aware of that so you need to weigh that up as a consideration of what to expect once your child is earth side.

  54. AmberWaves80 Avatar

    YTA for being a white midwesterner who is going to name their child Krishna.

  55. PuzzleheadedRun4525 Avatar

    I hope you spent at least some thought on how this will negatively affect them beyond just “sure they may get teased a little but they’ll be able to handle it”.

    The teasing could be severe. Why throw some meat in his pocket and send him to the wolves?

    YTA

  56. wienerdogqueen Avatar

    Are you Indian? If you’re not Desi, HUGE YTA. Some of y’all need therapy and a smack in the head with a common sense hammer.

    If you’re Desi, NTA at all. Your in-laws are assholes and possibly racist.

  57. Wobblingoblin01 Avatar

    NTA. It’s no different than Hispanics naming their kids Jesus. 🤷🏼‍♀️ name that baby whatever you want…. But remember that baby boy Krishna will grow up to be adult man Krishna and will need to go to college, put out resumes, find jobs, etc. so be mindful of that.

    I would NOT want to put that on a resume.

  58. Chaotic-Eevee Avatar

    OP, you are NTA for setting boundaries with your family and your husband’s family. I love that he has your back and supports your decision! I am going to say that you should not name your child and potential future children Krishna or anything that is directly related to a religion. Even if you were a practicing Hindu, your child would feel pressured to keep that as part of their identity and it will likely be harmful in the long run. It’s especially bad since you’re not a practicing Hindu, and it could be seen as being directly disrespectful to the original culture.

  59. Bittybellie Avatar

    YTA. You don’t get to pick a name from a culture you have no connection to and be ignorant of the real stance of how the culture it’s from would feel about it. This just comes across as gross. Seriously unless you want to set your child up for a confusing difficult future don’t use this 

  60. StardustandDreams Avatar

    NTA don’t listen to these idiots on Reddit name your baby what you want to name your baby just because he’s white doesn’t mean he can’t have a Hindu name. These people are just making themselves sound racist. As far as your mother and mother-in-law go they’re not the ones raising that baby. They’re not the ones naming that baby. It’s not their baby! They want to go no contact? I say let them go no contact. Thank God your husband has a spine and backed you up! That sounds like a real man. To be honest I’ve always loved the name Krishna. I used to want to name my daughter (if I ever had one) Sita and I’ve gotten flack for that too. In the end it’s your life and it’s your child. No one gets to push s*** like that on to someone else it’s not their decision.

  61. victorianfollies Avatar

    YTA.

    I want to believe this is an April Fools joke, and that it’s not possible to be this culturally tactless in the year of someone’s lord 2025

  62. Legitimate_Delay_315 Avatar

    I’m sorry but no NTA, it is not their baby, if you want to name your child Krishna for whatever that reason may be, that is completely up to you and husband. Sounds like husband is in agreement. For them to start attacking you verbally because of it is ridiculous not their place nor their home.

  63. Complete_Breakfast_1 Avatar

    INFO: Are you and your husband both white and American? Because if so your family are 100% right to be concerned about your name choice, some of their argument for why it a bad idea may be ignorant but it doesn’t stop it from being a bad idea. Think of your unborn child, naming a white boy after an Indian God is going to lead to a long and miserable life for that kid, he is going to get picked on, especially in the American education system, people are going to think you’re some new age hippie the kind who try so hard not to be racist they somehow end up being more racist, people will judge you and more importantly people will judge your child.

    If you and/or your partner are of Hindu/Indian heritage and presumably naming your child after a God in Indian culture is not a taboo thing, then go for it, fuck the haters.

  64. NoYoureAPancake Avatar

    Yeah if you’re white, which apparently you are, this is not the move. So YTA, I guess.

  65. AngelIslington Avatar

    ESH

    The fact your family seem determined to get your son baptised, even though it’s not something that you want

    but Krishna, really

    your naming your child “God” in a religion that is not your own

    i went on this site to check the popularity, and it also gave alternatives. Maybe consider one of them

    https://www.thebump.com/b/krishna-baby-name

  66. SirMaximusBlack Avatar

    Nta

    Your child’s name is none of their business. They can go fly a kite

  67. motaboat Avatar

    Aweful name for a boy! Sounds like a girls name. You are setting a son u on to have to defend that name. Don’t burden your child like that.

  68. DaveyDumplings Avatar

    Jesus christ what a terrible name. Don’t do that.

  69. Emergency-Bag-2249 Avatar

    I’m a little confused tho did OP state that she’s white? Everyone keeps saying that but just because she said they go to church doesn’t automatically mean she’s white. Does she live in an area where there is a high Hindu population? Y’all are the assholes for this one.

    Ma’am name your child what you want. Yes he might get picked on, just make him proud to have that name. Teach him about the god he is named after and the mean kids will not bother him.

    No matter what you name your child, your child can be bullied. My name has been around for centuries and I still got bullied – not for my name but for the hair on my arms, the size of my nose, the color of my skin, etc. Kids are just mean no matter what.

    Stand your ground and name your kid what you want and don’t apologize to them. They made a pregnant woman cry. They should be kissing your feet, especially if they want to be in your son’s life.

  70. Imaginary-Angle-42 Avatar

    You’re set on the name but please look forward to this name as an adult. Like the song “A Boy Named Sue” you are setting your child up for constant challenges and explanations. Please don’t. I wouldn’t even use it as a middle name.

    Also, consider the initials your child will have. KAD, (cad), BOY, MAD—you get the idea. We nominated several name combinations because of what the initials said. You can’t control the future I recognize but you can set your child up for some success now.

  71. featherdusterempire Avatar

    As a random person on the Internet, you’re NTA for kicking out your family members over mocking your name choice. 100% would have done that myself.

    As an Indian person, YTA (you and your husband) for choosing to give a non-Indian/non-Hindu kid in a primarily non-diverse — one who has ZERO say in this decision — a name that is so closely associated with a particular race and religion. I don’t think you’re culturally appropriating but I do think you have conflated an appreciation for something with the potential for lifelong resentment for your kid. I think Jupiter is a cool name; I wouldn’t name my kid that.

    I would also look into the actual meaning of Krishna (it’s not God in Hindi or Sanskrit). Maybe try to find an anglicized version of this name because it would prevent your kid from constantly explaining themselves to anyone they meet.

  72. FortuneWhereThoutBe Avatar

    NTA

    Regardless of what name you choose, none of them had the right to go at you like that. You and DH did the right thing kicking out the disrespectful people. I am soo glad DH put his mother in her place when she claimed your baby was to be baptized.

    Mute their numbers for a few days.You and DH sit down and come up with boundaries and punishments for family members who disrespect you guys now and in the future. Let both families know and mute them until they truly apologize

  73. carchmarq Avatar

    krishna is a /tragediegh

  74. Bluewaveempress Avatar

    Cultural appropriation.