I 16M have a sister 18F who is always rude to me talks me down and says on numeral occasions that she doesnt wanna be seen out in public with me. today i got up at 10 and had to work at 2 pm so i went to buy groceries to make food because no one was home. my lazy sister came downstairs when i finished my meal and she was visibly angry that i did not cook for her i honestly wanted to make a quick wrap and go to work and afterwards i cleared up a sizable amount of the mess the dishwasher however needed to be emptied. i did not have enough time. my sister demanded me to do it and saying “mum will be upset if you dont” i went to work and she did not empty the dishwasher. after my 7 hour shift i got home showered came downstairs and my mum said why did you not cook for your sister and i got a little pissed and said shes a grown adult woman she should take care of herself. She is gonna end up living with you till her 30s fr. i then said i want to make clear i do NOT like that your putting that responsability on me and never on her even though she is an adult. she wouldnt do the same for me. am i the asshole?
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I 16M have a sister 18F who is always rude to me talks me down and says on numeral occasions that she doesnt wanna be seen out in public with me. today i got up at 10 and had to work at 2 pm so i went to buy groceries to make food because no one was home. my lazy sister came downstairs when i finished my meal and she was visibly angry that i did not cook for her i honestly wanted to make a quick wrap and go to work and afterwards i cleared up a sizable amount of the mess the dishwasher however needed to be emptied. i did not have enough time. my sister demanded me to do it and saying “mum will be upset if you dont” i went to work and she did not empty the dishwasher. after my 7 hour shift i got home showered came downstairs and my mum said why did you not cook for your sister and i got a little pissed and said shes a grown adult woman she should take care of herself. She is gonna end up living with you till her 30s fr. i then said i want to make clear i do NOT like that your putting that responsability on me and never on her even though she is an adult. she wouldnt do the same for me. am i the asshole?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> i genuinly forgot to cook for her. idk man id want the same back
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA.
That level of entitlement is crazy. Does your mom normally side with your sister or did your sister twist the story? She’s 18 and should be able to know how to whip up simple foods.
Definitely NTA — if you’re old enough to cook for yourself, then so is she. And your mom is 1) being unfair to put that on you and 2) doing a disservice to your sister by feeding into that expectation
What was your mother’s response after she picked up her jaw off the ground? NTA
NTA
Your mom is the AH.
>shes a grown adult woman she should take care of herself
Exactly. You are NTA. Your mom however, is enabling your sister who most definitely is.
the fact that she is rude to you all the time and than expects you to cook for her? and your mother siding with her? absolutely insane. your sister is obviously very much spoiled… if i havent make it clear enough – you are definitely NTA!!!
I think you need to calm down and speak to your mother in a more respecful manner. However, you have a valid point and I would also refuse to take care of your sister. How can that be your responsibility? Wait. Is your sister crippled or disabled in some way?
NTA, anything extra that you do for someone within your family home is a gift. Not a requirement. In reality your sister , being the adult in the home without a job should be contributing to the household by cooking for the rest of you & at the very least emptying the dishwasher. You’ve got the right idea, just keep doing you, be there for your mum when you can & take responsibility for your own messes . Don’t be bullied into caregiving another “kid” in the home. Tell her she’s special but not that damn special! ✌🏼
NTA OP,
You have every right to not cook for your sister; in fact you’re younger then her too. She should also take responsibility for her life.