My(15) dad(38) regularly sends me to the bookshop to buy these books for him. He’s too embarrassed to go buy them himself since the genre/category is romance and women’s fiction. Won’t do online shopping either since he hates filling in his information online. Afraid of getting hacked.
Anyway, I ran into my grandma(dad’s mom) at the shop yesterday. At first she was pleasantly surprised. Then she noticed the book I was carrying, frowned and said I’m too young to be reading such things, and that my dad’s being an irresponsible parent for letting me read them.
I wasn’t sure how to proceed. On one hand, he specifically told me it’s ’between us’ – no one is to know. On the other hand, I know how much her and Grandpa’s approval means to him. In the end I chose to keep my mouth shut.
She told me to have lunch with her and while we were at the table, waiting for food, she called and berated my dad. Told him he must have lost his mind to be letting his teenage kid read toxic, abusive romances.
Dad seemed pretty embarrassed when I got home and told me I should have said something before she called and chewed him out.
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My(15) dad(38) regularly sends me to the bookshop to buy these books for him. He’s too embarrassed to go buy them himself since the genre/category is romance and women’s fiction. Won’t do online shopping either since he hates filling in his information online. Afraid of getting hacked.
Anyway, I ran into my grandma(dad’s mom) at the shop yesterday. At first she was pleasantly surprised. Then she noticed the book I was carrying, frowned and said I’m too young to be reading such things, and that my dad’s being an irresponsible parent for letting me read them.
I wasn’t sure how to proceed. On one hand, he specifically told me it’s ’between us’ – no one is to know. On the other hand, I know how much her and Grandpa’s approval means to him. In the end I chose to keep my mouth shut.
She told me to have lunch with her and while we were at the table, waiting for food, she called and berated my dad. Told him he must have lost his mind to be letting his teenage kid read toxic, abusive romances.
Dad seemed pretty embarrassed when I got home and told me I should have said something before she called and chewed him out.
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> I might be the asshole since my silence led to my dad getting told off by my grandma.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
Your dad is a COWARD.
After you defended him he threw you under the bus
NTA: You had your dad’s back. It is really, really disappointing that he didn’t have yours.
NTA
Tell him it’s his problem, he can fix it. You’re not eager for her approval the way he is, so if he wants her to know or to not berate you… he can tell her himself that the books are for him. (He probably won’t)
NTA.
what is it you could have said? they’re not your books, so it would have been wrong for you to create some kind of excuse or lie about the situation. the alternative would be to say they’re his and then what?
YTA! You need to respect your elders. They’re going to give you a hard time and that is just life.
You did the right thing. And grandma needs to mind her own business.
You kept your part of the bargain. Trust me, if you had told her the truth he would have said you should have kept quiet.
It’s not clear, did he tell her or did he just keep his mouth shut, too?? It was on him to tell the truth. He needs to grow up and do his own book shopping.
AI
AI
AI
You could have said “My girlfriend said I was too boring, so I was looking for ways to make her excited!”
NTA!! Your dad should’ve handled the situation himself seeing as he is the adult, the parent, and you were put in that predicament expressly to buy those books for him. I’m going to guess that since he’s too embarrassed to buy the books himself, he was feeling super embarrassed at the whole situation and instead of adulting in the moment he reacted emotionally instead and took his embarrassment out on you by blaming you. If I were you I’d tell grandma, next time she brings it up, that she was right and you’ve decided to stop buying that trash. And the next time dad asks for another book run I’d tell him the same.
NTA
NTA, and this is why co-conspirators have to work on their ‘dismount’ before committing a crime.
The books were for a friend/cousin/violin teacher of yours, not for you or your dad.
NTA. If he can’t be man enough to buy the books himself, tells you to keep it quiet, and gets mad when you don’t correct his mom because of it, he would be upset if you had told her, too.
nta but it’s not granny’s right to police your reading
NTA your dad can’t have it both ways. He specifically told you not to tell anyone those books were for him, he doesn’t get to backtrack after Grandma chews him out and thinks you should have somehow known it was ok to tell her. Maybe he should have cleared it up when she called, ya know like an adult
You’re NTA.
Your grandma needs to mind her own business.
Your dad needs to grow a… spine and tell her so. He also needs to get his own books. Why should he care if complete strangers know about or even mock his taste in books?
NTA
You dad probably would have bene mad and embaressed if you said they were for him because then grandma would have just berated him for having his kid buy him books.
He’d have been embaressed either way and he’s taking those feelings out on you, when you did nothing but help him and then have his back.
I second the person calling him a coward.
You did good by not saying they were his. You showed your dad that you can be trusted with sensitive information.
It’s just too bad that he isn’t mature enough to appreciate that and respect you.