So I (18m) have been looking for a job for the past 4 months and haven’t landed anything yet. I live with my girlfriend and her family.
My girlfriend’s sister works at a bar and set up a shift for me to do yesterday (thursday). I only learnt of this the night before and started at 12pm so it was a bit short notice but whatever. I worked the shift (12pm-2pm and 5pm-8pm) and all I was really doing was waiting tables and helping the bartender with small tasks.
Anyway I had plans today (friday), my girlfriend and I went to the hot pools so we were out from about 12.30pm until 2.30pm. only at 2pm her sister messaged her asking if i could do a shift starting at 5pm tonight. I said no because i was tired and it was 3 hours notice i wasn’t expecting to be working anything today.
her sister had to do the shift instead and had already worked a small shift today. When i go out to grab dinner (sisters partner cooked) i thanked him and he completely ignored me but then went on to have a full conversation with girlfriends mum. okay?
i bumped into him again in the kitchen an hour later and thanked him and he mumbled under his breath thankyou in a snarky way.
her sister gets home at 9 and i can hear her and her partner in the kitchen talking so i listened in. i heard her complaining something to do with the shift she had to work and then i heard something about “we definitely need him tomorrow it gets busy at 5”.
i was originally meant to work saturday too but today when my girlfriend texted her sister saying i can’t do today her sister replied don’t worry about saturday then it’s too late.
i don’t really want to work tomorrow night because their attitude toward me has just made me mad and put me off working with them. i’m expected to work on a few hours notice at a place im not even employed at? her sister is 35f and her partner is 50m btw.
am i the asshole?
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So I (18m) have been looking for a job for the past 4 months and haven’t landed anything yet. I live with my girlfriend and her family.
My girlfriend’s sister works at a bar and set up a shift for me to do yesterday (thursday). I only learnt of this the night before and started at 12pm so it was a bit short notice but whatever. I worked the shift (12pm-2pm and 5pm-8pm) and all I was really doing was waiting tables and helping the bartender with small tasks.
Anyway I had plans today (friday), my girlfriend and I went to the hot pools so we were out from about 12.30pm until 2.30pm. only at 2pm her sister messaged her asking if i could do a shift starting at 5pm tonight. I said no because i was tired and it was 3 hours notice i wasn’t expecting to be working anything today.
her sister had to do the shift instead and had already worked a small shift today. When i go out to grab dinner (sisters partner cooked) i thanked him and he completely ignored me but then went on to have a full conversation with girlfriends mum. okay?
i bumped into him again in the kitchen an hour later and thanked him and he mumbled under his breath thankyou in a snarky way.
her sister gets home at 9 and i can hear her and her partner in the kitchen talking so i listened in. i heard her complaining something to do with the shift she had to work and then i heard something about “we definitely need him tomorrow it gets busy at 5”.
i was originally meant to work saturday too but today when my girlfriend texted her sister saying i can’t do today her sister replied don’t worry about saturday then it’s too late.
i don’t really want to work tomorrow night because their attitude toward me has just made me mad and put me off working with them. i’m expected to work on a few hours notice at a place im not even employed at? her sister is 35f and her partner is 50m btw.
am i the asshole?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> (1.) I might be the asshole because i didn’t work the shift and don’t want to work tomorrow even though i originally agreed to. (2.) because i let them down and because i had agreed to work saturday night before all this happened
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
Clear NTA. You don’t work there, it’s not your problem.
NTA…tell them to let you know when you’re hired. Then you’ll get a schedule like an employee. You’re not there to cover for the sister when she doesn’t feel like working.
NTA. You don’t work there, you never agreed to be on call, and it’s unreasonable for them to expect you to drop everything on a few hours’ notice. Helping out once doesn’t mean you owe them your time, and their passive-aggressive attitude just makes it worse. They’re acting like you’re an employee when you’re not, so you’re not wrong for saying no.
Absolutely NTA. You don’t have to jump when a place you don’t even work asks you
Is this a family business? You are living at these folks’ house and eating their food. What are you contributing?
I-n-f-o- how are you getting paid for covering a shift at a place where you’re not even employed?
Obvious NTA for not giving in to these last minute demands and bratty behavior directed at you when you don’t, but I’m curious to know if and how you’re paid for it when you do.
If you’ve been looking for a job for four months, why aren’t you asking about how/when/how much they will pay you and working every shift you can get?
What are you contributing to your girlfriend’s family’s household if you don’t have a job?
You don’t work there. Who is paying you? Do you have access to the till? You could get into some serious trouble.
NTA
I applied at a not yet opened boba shop once and my “Interview” was just them training me and another girl how to make drinks for two hours. I asked her “Is this our first training?? They didn’t even interview me first!” and she said “Yeah me either…i thought this was my interview..” and after we left we were both put on the schedule for opening day with absolutely no word from the managers.
We weren’t shown how to clock in, how to use the til, cleaning duties, break times etc. They just plopped us both in there on GRAND OPENING DAY WITH ZERO HELP OR REAL TRAINING. No w2 or i9’s before the first day either!!!!
We didn’t get paid for that 2 hours ORRR for opening day. this is exactly why I will never work anywhere without signing paperwork first. Even if i’m volunteering!