Hey all. For college my mom bought me (19M) one of those pillows where it has a real picture of your pet. She did one of my cat, who I love more than anything. She told me it was so I could have something to remember him by while I’m away. Which is really sweet! But the problem is… I find it really creepy! It just doesn’t sit right with me. It would maybe be different if it was a full picture of him, but the pillow is shaped like a cat. She was telling me for days she had a surprise for me, and I told her I really appreciated the gesture but I found it slightly disturbing. She said it was fine that I let my little sister have it, but I feel bad because she was excited to give it to me. I’d rather hang a picture up of my cat, i think the pillow just disturbs me because its a stuffed version of him. AITA?
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Hey all. For college my mom bought me (19M) one of those pillows where it has a real picture if your pet. She did one of my cat, who I love more than anything. She told me it was so I could have something to remember him by while I’m away. Which is really sweet! But the problem is… I find it really creepy! It just doesn’t sit right with me. It would maybe be different if it was a full picture of him, but the pillow is shaped like a cat. She was telling me for days she had a surprise for me, and I told her I really appreciated the gesture but I found it slightly disturbing. She said it was fine that I let my little sister have it, but I feel bad because she was excited to give it to me. I’d rather hang a picture up of my cat, i think the pillow just disturbs me because its a stuffed version of him. AITA?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I didn’t accept the gift my mother was excited to give me. I think that would make me an asshole for being inconsiderate
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTAH, your mom was excited about the thought of giving you something special. It shows how much she loves and appreciates you. Being honest with her is important, letting her know just how much you appreciate the effort she put into it and that you love her for that. It doesn’t mean you need to keep a gift that makes you uncomfortable. That’s how a hoarder is made. Instead, you share the love with your sister who would appreciate it. It is a win win in my mind. It just comes down to how you explain it, ensuring it is heartfelt and genuine.
Mild YTA. There is an old saying about not looking a gift horse in the mouth. When you don’t act gracious when receiving a gift, you teach people not to gift you things. Most people just act appreciative regardless and then later do something else with stuff they don’t want.
NTA. You have every right to have a genuine reaction to the pillow, and while it’s well-intentioned and done out of love, the stuffed version makes you think of taxidermy. I get that.
Gently moving the gift on to one who appreciates it is a good thing, and hopefully your mother understands. The picture of your cat you propose sounds like a better option.
NTA – You appreciated the thought, but you’re allowed to have preferences about what you keep. You were honest, your mom was fine with giving it to your sister, and no one’s feelings seem deeply hurt.
Soft YTA. Yes those pillows are creepy but the gesture is so sweet I would have kept it and taken it with me and just hid it under the bed until she visited.
Could have been a great opportunity for a family joke. Years later admitting it was hideous but you kept it anyway cause you love your mom.
Remember you can’t spell families without lies lol
Not sure if it’s full YTA but you could have just put the pillow somewhere out of sight.
NTA – sometimes we get gifts we don’t like. You can either have a somewhat awkward conversation or just pretend you like it and not use it. Since it’s your mom, it was probably best to just be honest and it’s nice that someone in your family is using it.
NAH. Normally, I would say smile and take it, but because it is so specific of your cat, your mom would want to see it out, and hear about how it makes you happy. But for some people, like you, having something physical of a living (or passed) animal is really not OK to see, and that is alright too. I think giving it to your sister – who i assume also loves the cat and wants it – is the perfect solution. That way, a gift of love is truly loved by someone and not hidden in a closet somewhere. Your mom will be sad for a bit, but it will all end up ok, esp. once she sees how much your sister loves it.
I would edit your post with a correction of the title however, as you added “not” to giving it to your sister, so some people are getting the wrong impression.