My brother is an amateur racing driver, he puts alot of his own money and time into it he’s incredibly passionate about it and he’s very good, has started winning races against professional companies and I’m happy for him but I’ve got zero interest in going to see him compete live. The events take place at a venue at least 2 hours drive from here, tickets are £50, I have zero interest in cars and I’ve been to similar events when I was a kid and I always found them incredibly boring.
My family are trying to guilt me into going and I’ve said no several times, I wouldn’t even speak to him for 99% of the event because he’ll be busy taking part. I also have the perfect excuse, for about 7 years I took part in and ran local sporting events, it was something I was incredibly passionate about and good at, my team even completed at a national level and came second.
The 30+ events I organised, ran and competed in were 30 minutes away and tickets would cost £5 and yet none of my family including my brother bothered to come to a single one to either support or show even the slightest bit of interest, which is fine. But I won’t be guilted into spending £50 and one of my days off to take part in something I’ve no interest in.
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My brother is an amateur racing driver, he puts alot of his own money and time into it he’s incredibly passionate about it and he’s very good, has started winning races against professional companies and I’m happy for him but I’ve got zero interest in going to see him compete live. The events take place at a venue at least 2 hours drive from here, tickets are £50, I have zero interest in cars and I’ve been to similar events when I was a kid and I always found them incredibly boring.
My family are trying to guilt me into going and I’ve said no several times, I wouldn’t even speak to him for 99% of the event because he’ll be busy taking part. I also have the perfect excuse, for about 7 years I took part in and ran local sporting events, it was something I was incredibly passionate about and good at, my team even completed at a national level and came second.
The 30+ events I organised, ran and competed in were 30 minutes away and tickets would cost £5 and yet none of my family including my brother bothered to come to a single one to either support or show even the slightest bit of interest, which is fine. But I won’t be guilted into spending £50 and one of my days off to take part in something I’ve no interest in.
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1) Because I’m refusing to go see my brother compete at one of his racing events
2) because I should support him in something that is very important to him
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA. Quid pro quo has existed as a saying since Latin times for a reason.
NTA. Don’t even need to explain it.
NTA, but you don’t need the ‘excuse’; it just makes you sound petty when the reality is you don’t want to go, don’t enjoy the sport, and don’t want to have to spend £50 to sit and watch it.
NTA
Your family is the AH for not attending your events. They also sound narcissistic for guilt tripping you.
I’ve found that when people really push me to do something that I don’t to do and they won’t accept “No” as an answer, and I’ve explained why, they don’t really listen.
So now I say that it sounds really interesting, and I’d love to do x, but unfortunately I’m really busy. If they question why I just smile and change the topic, or ask them a question about something unrelated, or don’t answer, or walk off.
They then feel happy that I wanted to do it. It’s stupid, but it works.
NTA
No need to go.