AITA for not letting my friend borrow my car?

r/

so my friend asked to borrow my car to go on a trip for the weekend and i told them no because i dont feel comfortable with anyone else driving it they got mad and said i was selfish because they needed it for something important but i told them they could rent a car or take a bus they said i was a terrible friend and now a couple people in our friend group are saying i should have just helped out am i the asshole?

Comments

  1. AutoModerator Avatar

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    so my friend asked to borrow my car to go on a trip for the weekend and i told them no because i dont feel comfortable with anyone else driving it they got mad and said i was selfish because they needed it for something important but i told them they could rent a car or take a bus they said i was a terrible friend and now a couple people in our friend group are saying i should have just helped out am i the asshole?

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    OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:

    > i might be the asshole because i refused to help my friend when they needed a car and it made me look selfish to them and our friend group

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  3. Dull-Crew1428 Avatar

    then those couple of friends can lean him their car

  4. mookler Avatar

    NTA that could be an insurance nightmare that falls on you

  5. Intrepid_Building_78 Avatar

    NTA – if a friend calls you out for not giving someone else your car, thank them for their generosity to allow said friend to borrow their car.

  6. icnoevil Avatar

    Never loan a car. You always own the liability and that can be a really big deal.

  7. toosheeptheorist Avatar

    NTA – as soon as they are willing to sign for responsibility for ANYTHING that happens to your car (accident, damages, wear & tear) and be willing to reimburse you for any expenses related on your car THEN they can borrow it. Until that point in time then they need to look at other modes of transportation. Loaning out a car can be a serious endeavor, especially with how much they cost to replace, repair and upkeep. And if the friends in the group are saying you’re an AH, then they should lend THEIR car to the other person.

  8. LazyAd622 Avatar

    Don’t loan your car.

  9. LelandHeron Avatar

    NTA: All I have to read is “borrow my car”.  That’s enough to know.  No one else ever deserves the use of your car, no explanation needed.  The reason is a car represents a large personal investment and responsible.  No one EVER deserves to borrow that from you.

  10. Jadeisland Avatar

    NTA. Never lend your car to someone who isn’t listed as a driver on your insurance policy. Your friend is very entitled and selfish. He/she obviously doesn’t care about the problem you would have if there was an accident or it was stolen.

  11. Individual_Ad_9213 Avatar

    NTA. Tell those who think you should lend you car to your friend to feel free to lend them their car(s).

  12. Grey-n-Bent Avatar

    NTA and to those in your friends group who disagree YOU lend him YOUR car.

  13. mavenmim Avatar

    NTA. Its your car. You have a right to say no to someone else borrowing it. You don’t even say that they have comprehensive insurance for driving it, or that you didn’t need it that weekend. It is possibly okay to ask, depending on the insurance and whether you offer to pay for fuel and contribute to wear and tear, but hugely entitled to get mad when you can’t borrow something on demand.

  14. Tired-of-this-world Avatar

    NTA

    Never ever lend anyone your car or stuff because they will not respect it. You can bet if you did lend it to her it would come back with no fuel in it and no doubt a bump or two which she will adamantly deny causing.

  15. Odd-Bee1647 Avatar

    Never ever loan anything you’re not willing to part with forever

  16. kaosf Avatar

    NTA I’ve never loaned a car and had it come back in the same shape. At this point in my life, I would give money to someone to pay for a rental before I would loan my car. It never works out well for the car owner.

  17. ArtWorldOrder Avatar

    Not necessarily a friend, this is a parasite.

  18. KarinSpaink Avatar

    NTA. Borrowing somebody’s car is a favour, not a right.

  19. blackfish68 Avatar

    NTA. I would just be a terrible friend

  20. NotTheEightBall Avatar

    Those are not friends.

  21. NNW9876 Avatar

    NTA. If they can’t afford their own car, they can’t afford to replace yours if they wreck it.

  22. No1PoundPup Avatar

    NTA, You need better friends.

  23. dncrmom Avatar

    If only there was a company that loaned out vehicles for a small usage fee….. get better friends. NTA

  24. ren_ats_ur_cookies Avatar

    thanks for the help everyone 🙏🙏

  25. ThePhilVv Avatar

    If this wasn’t so terribly written I would assume this was AI:

    >and now a couple people in our friend group are saying i should have just helped

    Why is this always a thing on these reddit posts? “Person did something objectively bad, but all of our friends/family are saying I’m the bad person, even though they didn’t offer to help”.

    The responses are ALWAYS:

    “Why didn’t friends/family offer to lend thing / do thing for the person?”

    Obviously NTA.

  26. AnnaMouse102 Avatar

    NTA. Don’t loan it to family members either. My mom did that, loaned her car to her sister to help her move. It was returned needing maintenance and with a dent.

  27. Standard-Help-8531 Avatar

    NTA. They aren’t insured to drive your car.

  28. PatientTough9845 Avatar

    NTA It’s your car. You paid for it. If you think if anything happens to your car that the person or the friends in your gang are going to pay for it; guess again.

  29. SupermanistheDR Avatar

    NTA my cousin lent her best friend get car and she wrecked it. The best friend sued my cousin (I don’t remember exactly why) and won some judgement. It was a mess my cousin owed tens of thousands of dollars was out a best friend and a car because she was try to be a good friend. Don’t lend anyone your car.

  30. sublime_369 Avatar

    Those couple of people can loan him their car. NTA.

  31. Ditka85 Avatar

    The last time I loaned my car, the loanee loaned it to somebody else who wrecked it. That was in 1980, the last time someone used my car.

  32. Time-Bee-5069 Avatar

    NTA. Find a new friend.

  33. Agostointhesun Avatar

    NTA – If your friend needs a car so badly, they can rent one. Or the people who are calling you names can lend them THEIR car.

  34. Hesnotarealdr Avatar

    NTA as usual then one person escalates to others attempting to make the poster bend to their will. It‘s your car and you need it. End of story. Friend showed himself to be user, not a friend. Let the other folk loan said “friend” their car for the weekend.

  35. Burns70800 Avatar

    NTA. For a number of reasons. Don’t even give it a second thought.

  36. CoderJoe1 Avatar

    NTA – Real friends would have accepted ‘No’ for an answer.

  37. Rocketeer57 Avatar

    NTA. As a general rule of thumb: Never lend your car to anyone.

  38. South_Air878 Avatar

    You are in the right.
    If your circles of friends is so concerned, someone can learn this person a car. Never lend your car.

  39. abcdef_U2 Avatar

    NTA
    You should not be allowing someone to borrow your car. If they get mad about it, they got issues of their own.

    Sorry, I don’t lend my car out to others. I am the only person insured to drive it. I am not in a position to lose everything because someone got in an accident, doesn’t matter who is at fault, I would rather you not put me in that position by asking to borrow it.

  40. ShadiestCharacter_99 Avatar

    NTA – A friend of mine was guilted into letting someone borrow his car for the weekend, the guy totaled it and he never offered to pay any of the related expenses. Friendship over.

    Reevaluate your friend group. Seriously.

  41. jtbear91 Avatar

    NTA
    What a shitty entitled attitude from your “friend”
    If he can’t handle the answer with maturity he has no right to ask the question

  42. Gotholithicgirl Avatar

    NTA Anything could happen to your car when someone borrows it. Cars are one thing that I hesitate to let people borrow.

  43. kkrolla Avatar

    NTA. Cars are not community property.

  44. 2dogslife Avatar

    I have, on exceptionally rare occasions, lent my car to friends or family when theirs was in the shop and they had a few errands and needed my car for an hour, maybe two.

    I have also given rides as well in such situations. I have never handed off my keys for an extended period to someone because they couldn’t get their life together to either buy their own car, arrange a rental, or look into other transportation options available to them. Perhaps even inviting another friend along for the weekend in which said friend gets a vacation, the other gets a ride and chips in for gas and tolls (if applicable).

    NTA

  45. Bluestuffedelephant Avatar

    NTA

    I was in the past in a position where I had to borrow friends’ cars, It was always for an hour tops, and only for important errands. Weekend joyrides is then you borrow from your parents or simply rent.

  46. Dog_Concierge Avatar

    Sticks and stones…let them call you what they will. Not your business. NTA