AITA for not letting my mum borrow my suitcase this time?

r/

So my mum goes on loads of holidays every year, like honestly 9 or 10. For some reason she never has her own suitcase, so she always borrows mine. I’ve never minded before and always said yes.

But this time when she asked again I said something like, “Do you not think you should buy your own suitcase with how often you go away?” I only go away once or twice a year so I have my own.

Every time I bring this up she says she has no money, but it’s kinda hard to believe when she’s constantly travelling. So this time I just told her no.

Now she’s acting like I’m horrible and nasty for not letting her borrow it, completely forgetting all the other times I’ve said yes. She’s basically fallen out with me over it.

So yeah, AITA for not letting my mum borrow my suitcase this time?

Comments

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    So my mum goes on loads of holidays every year, like honestly 9 or 10. For some reason she never has her own suitcase, so she always borrows mine. I’ve never minded before and always said yes.

    But this time when she asked again I said something like, “Do you not think you should buy your own suitcase with how often you go away?” I only go away once or twice a year so I have my own.

    Every time I bring this up she says she has no money, but it’s kinda hard to believe when she’s constantly travelling. So this time I just told her no.

    Now she’s acting like I’m horrible and nasty for not letting her borrow it, completely forgetting all the other times I’ve said yes. She’s basically fallen out with me over it.

    So yeah, AITA for not letting my mum borrow my suitcase this time?

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    OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:

    > 1. Refused to let my mum borrow my suitcase this time

    1. It would do no harm letting her borrow my suitcase as I’m not using it

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  3. Total_Landscape_673 Avatar

    NTA. Your suitcase your rules.

  4. IllustriousBowler259 Avatar

    it’s okay to not want your suitcase being better-travelled than you are.

    But, if she has no money for a suitcase, how does she have money for the travel? Her over the top reaction rings alarm bells.

    Of course, this is just me being suspicious, but… I’d be checking my suitcase for hidden smuggling areas.

    NTA

  5. Aussie_Foodie Avatar

    Buy her one for Xmas

  6. RandomRamblings99 Avatar

    NTA. If she has the money for so many holidays, she has the money for her own suitcase

  7. Sifiisnewreality Avatar

    Thrift stores have plenty.

  8. evelynsmee Avatar

    NTA but I reckon if you’d bought her a suitcase as a Christmas present like years ago when this shenanigan started you would now be Favourite Child rather than Child She Is Annoyed At For No Sane Reason. Maybe an idea for this year

  9. Money_System1026 Avatar

    NTA. 

    Christmas is coming. Maybe buy her one. 

  10. Royal_Eye6517 Avatar

    NTA. It’s normal not to mind lending something occasionally but, if the borrower is using it so many times a year, they should obviously look at getting their own. You are risking the suitcase getting battered (moreso if flying) and it’s not fair she’s using it SO much more than you do that it will shorten the life of the case. She can clearly afford it if she can afford to pay for travel and accommodation that many times in a year.

  11. Letters-Unsent Avatar

    NTA. But consider if it’s worth it to fall out with family over a suitcase? She shouldn’t be mad at you over it, but if you have the means to buy her one to end this conflict in a positive way, then I would imagine it is money very well spent.

  12. Anxious-Routine-5526 Avatar

    NTA.

    Buy her one for the holidays/her birthday.

  13. l3arn3r1 Avatar

    Let her borrow it.

    Then gift it to her for birthday/Christmas/Mothers Day whatever.

    Saves you getting a gift and the hassle.

  14. ChanceNutmegMom Avatar

    I know what she should ask Santa for!
    You are NTA.

  15. Mental_Body_5496 Avatar

    NTA but it is weird.

    Tell her to keep it and see her reaction.

  16. redditavenger2019 Avatar

    Esh. Sounds like a nice Christmas present for her.

  17. Reclinerbabe Avatar

    She’s your mom!! What’s your problem?

  18. Virtual-Ad7254 Avatar

    Suitcases don’t last forever, especially not with that amount of use. Apologise and give her the old one as a make up gesture. And then go buy yourself a new one and don’t tell her.

  19. LovelyLilac73 Avatar

    NTA – buy her a suitcase for Christmas. Problem solved.

  20. Engchik79 Avatar

    Mom. Buy your own suitcase if you can afford to go to Ibiza every year. The end.

  21. FatterThanIThinkIAm Avatar

    I would just tell her to keep it because she’s using it so often, and if you need it, you’ll ask for it back then. And then I’d quietly go buy myself a new one and not tell her.

  22. Soap_on_a_potato Avatar

    NTA seriously if she can’t afford her own suitcase how tf can she afford to travel

  23. Kappybook916 Avatar

    She has money to travel but can’t afford a suitcase? Yeah no. She can go to a thrift store to buy one. NTA.

  24. peace-rose Avatar

    NTA Couple of options. Make this the last time to borrow. Maybe for her birthday buy her a suitcase. Another option give her the suitcase and buy yourself a new up-dated one. 9 or 10 holidays are rough on a suitcase. Ask your mom to buy you a new one?

  25. Acceptable-Original Avatar

    Buy her a suitcase as present. Give her your suitcase and buy a new one for you.
    Don’t lend her your suitcase.