Aita for refusing to let my bf take food of my sons hands even though “he owed him”?
I apologize English is my first language. But I (F 25) and my boyfriend (M 30) and my son (M3) is who this story pertains too. A few days ago we were all spending time together and watching movies, I had made a store run and got snacks. One of the snacks my bf wanted was a honey bun I also got one for my son too. When my son got his honey bun he ate his and then lost the other one. It was no big deal we all said “oh well” and went about watching our movie.
Well on to this morning. We were laying in bed just playing on our phones before we got out of bed to start the day. My son comes in and he sees a honey bun that was mine I had bought last night on my nightstand. He grabbed it and climbed into bed with us. Before he could even ask for it my bf shoots up and rips it out of my son’s hands and says “nope it’s mine now he owes me one.” We go back and forth of me saying give it back to him because he’s a literal child and him refusing too. So I said “If don’t give it back I will never speak to you again, I wont let a man treat my son like that.” He stormed out of the house and kept saying “bet bet” over and over. It just made me so mad because my mothers bfs treated me and my little brother like crap and i refuse to let that happen. Should I have said something different Am I the asshole?
(And no he was not joking he was very serious during all this)
Comments
^^^^AUTOMOD Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read this before contacting the mod team
Aita for refusing to let my bf take food of my sons hands even though “he owed him”?
I apologize English is my first language. But I (F 25) and my boyfriend (M 30) and my son (M3) is who this story pertains too. A few days ago we were all spending time together and watching movies, I had made a store run and got snacks. One of the snacks my bf wanted was a honey bun I also got one for my son too. When my son got his honey bun he ate his and then lost the other one. It was no big deal we all said “oh well” and went about watching our movie.
Well on to this morning. We were laying in bed just playing on our phones before we got out of bed to start the day. My son comes in and he sees a honey bun that was mine I had bought last night on my nightstand. He grabbed it and climbed into bed with us. Before he could even ask for it my bf shoots up and rips it out of my son’s hands and says “nope it’s mine now he owes me one.” We go back and forth of me saying give it back to him because he’s a literal child and him refusing too. So I said “If don’t give it back I will never speak to you again, I wont let a man treat my son like that.” He stormed out of the house and kept saying “bet bet” over and over. It just made me so mad because my mothers bfs treated me and my little brother like crap and i refuse to let that happen. Should I have said something different Am I the asshole?
(And no he was not joking he was very serious during all this)
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I think I might be the asshole for giving him an ultimatum and being a little harsh when I said it
Help keep the sub engaging!
Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ
Subreddit Announcements
Follow the link above to learn more
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA, good for you!!!
Nope keep the 3 year old. Ditch the bf. Anyone who thinks a 3yo can owe them something needs to be kept away from 3yos.
WTF? He snatched food from a kid? And says he’s owed the food he snatched? It’s a damn pastry! He needs a bit more growing up.
Absolutely NTA
NTA. the trash has taken itself out.
Well done for standing up for your son and not letting this waste of space start down a path of potentially abusing your child and you.
Don’t let him come back!
NTA. No adult taking food from a 3 year old is a decent person. Not unless that food is life threatening.
WTAH does ‘bet bet’ mean? Like, he’s challenging you that you aren’t for real that you would never speak to him? Urgh, never mind…don’t care, doesn’t matter.
I think you know the answer to this one.
I couldn’t tell who lost who’s honey bun (your son lost his own or your bf’s?) but it really doesn’t matter, he is 3 and if the point was to teach him to ask for food before grabbing it, he did an awful job by grabbing it from HIM.
You don’t need your bf acting like a child, TO your child.
NTA
NTA. No reasonable adult is going to steal food from a toddlers hands. That dude sucks.
NTA. You were just being a good mom and he was demonstrating he would be an awful stepfather
NTA. Follow through! Leave that man in your past. Even if my preteen son ended up eating one of our snacks and forgot to ask, we just get another later on. This is a grown man literally snatching food out of a 3 year old’s hand. No ma’am, that is unacceptable behavior. Talking to the child about it would have been completely different. Remember before he or anyone tries to pull the "you ended it over a snack" nope, you ended it over the grown arse man acting worse than a toddler.
NTA. Please do not ever allow a man to treat your child poorly. I hope you never see that man again. He really thinks your child owes him? For a snack that YOU bought? A man like that is not a good role model for a child.
Your future ex bf is even less mature than your three year old. Toss him back, there are better fish in the sea. NTA
Nta. What monster snatches food out of a toddlers hands saying it belongs to them because they "owe them". You and your son deserve better.
NTA who tf steals food from a toddler?? You absolutely do not need that sort of person in your life. Good riddance.
So you have 2 toddlers and one is behaving abusively towards the other? That is a problem. I would side with the toddler you gave birth to who is an actual toddler and not a grown man behaving like one.
Bro literally took candy from a baby
NTA
You’re the hero in this story. You’re better off only dealing with one toddler now. NTA
NTA. There’s a huge difference between “sorry kiddo, that one’s mine, you had yours yesterday” and … this.
You’re a fantastic mom, thank you for protecting him. I hate hearing the stories of people treating their partners kids the way you were treated as a child . Like what is wrong with these people? If you can’t treat the kids well don’t get involved with someone with kids.
NTA if he acts like that in front of you imagine what he’ll do when you aren’t around. Your kid is too young to protect themselves. You need to put them first. Living with a guy who acts like a spoiled child is not putting them first.
NTA, but I don’t think your son lost that honeybun. He ate it, obviously.
Obviously, NTA. The guy grabs (your) food from a 3 yo. Leave him before your kid can remember being treated like crap by the partner you chose.
Your BF is very immature and shouldn’t behave that way.
On a side note , letting your son just take it without asking first is not good either. They’re never too young to learn manners.
NTA Did you buy that honey bun for your boyfriend? Because if you did then YOU should have gently told your son that honey bun was for your boyfriend. If you bought it for yourself, then your husband is an ass. He is an ass either way for how he grabbed it out of your son’s hand.