I (15f) just got back from going around europe for two weeks with my parents and two younger brothers, 11 and 13. A few days before our flight home I got my period and it was bad. Being already tired from traveling and being away from home didn’t help with my nausea, cramps and no energy.
To make it worse we had a full day of walking and sightseeing planned ahead of us. I asked my mom if I could just stay at the hotel and rest as I was in pain and really couldn’t be asked for any of it, she told me she knew it wasn’t pleasant but to try and push through as we only go abroad once a year and she didn’t want me to ruin the vibe.
It was awful, we spent the morning climbing up this hill to see a view of a city from a church, and my brothers the whole way through kept complaining about me needing to take breaks frequently to sit down while my parents just basically let them and didn’t tell them to shut up. What really pissed me off was them loudly embarrassing me in public at a restaurant about how many bathroom breaks I needed and they kept telling me I was killing the mood. (off topic but those free street bathrooms in paris are nasty 🤢)
When we got back to the hotel, I got into a massive argument with my mother and said a few things I admit were out of line and I regret that, she told me to remember how much money it had cost for all of us to take this trip and told me to be grateful. The final day of our trip came and she finally just let me stay at the hotel and rest. I know my parents work really hard for us to go on vacation and I was a bit rude to her, but I was in pain and I feel like everyone could of at least tried to pretend to give a shit about me.
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I (15f) just got back from going around europe for two weeks with my parents and two younger brothers, 11 and 13. A few days before our flight home I got my period and it was bad. Being already tired from traveling and being away from home didn’t help with my nausea, cramps and no energy.
To make it worse we had a full day of walking and sightseeing planned ahead of us. I asked my mom if I could just stay at the hotel and rest as I was in pain and really couldn’t be asked for any of it, she told me she knew it wasn’t pleasant but to try and push through as we only go abroad once a year and she didn’t want me to ruin the vibe.
It was awful, we spent the morning climbing up this hill to see a view of a city from a church, and my brothers the whole way through kept complaining about me needing to take breaks frequently to sit down while my parents just basically let them and didn’t tell them to shut up. What really pissed me off was them loudly embarrassing me in public at a restaurant about how many bathroom breaks I needed and they kept telling me I was killing the mood. (off topic but those free street bathrooms in paris are nasty 🤢)
When we got back to the hotel, I got into a massive argument with my mother and said a few things I admit were out of line and I regret that, she told me to remember how much money it had cost for all of us to take this trip and told me to be grateful. The final day of our trip came and she finally just let me stay at the hotel and rest. I know my parents work really hard for us to go on vacation and I was a bit rude to her, but I was in pain and I feel like everyone could of at least tried to pretend to give a shit about me.
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> 1) Being rude to my mother 2) my parents work hard to take us on vacation.
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Info: what stopped you from taking pain killers? You’re going to have your period for a long time you should really learn how to manage it
Nta that sounds like you get a bad menstrual cycle if it’s painful enough to keep you from sightseeing.have yon ever been taken to a doctor about it? There’s medical conditions like endometriosis that make periods extremely debilitating and they shouldnt be
INFO: what did you do to manage your symptoms, and what did you say to your mother?
NTA, tell an OBGYN that your periods are this bad though.
NTA
They should let you stay in the room. As it is, their experience was “ruined” (I doubt it somehow) and you’re left with unpleasant memories. Travelling and sightseeing should be a pleasure, not a chore! One should go on vacations to relax, not to complete some friggin’ to-do list.
You didn’t choose to be on your period. They choose to be dicks about it.
NTA. Why the hell wouldn’t your mom just let you stay at the hotel instead of spending the whole day walking around??
NTA- You clearly communicated to your family you needed to rest, and they insisted you “push through” all the while knowing you were feeling unwell, then gave you hard time about being unwell. It is not your fault for not “performing” to their ideal. Especially with painful period- sometimes we just can’t mask. Your family sucks for their lack of empathy.
Side note- make sure your doctor knows how painful and debilitating your periods are! Debilitating periods are actually not normal.
NTA. When I first start I’m bloated, feel awful, and just want to sleep. You’re old enough to have stayed behind at the hotel.
As for the next time and managing pain when away from home, I have found that packing midol or Tylenol really helps with my cramps and feeling off. I also don’t use tampons anymore as they seem to make my cycles worse. I prefer the menstrual discs or a cup with period underwear as backup. If you haven’t tried any of those, I encourage you to. I’m sorry your family, particularly your mom wasn’t supportive. She of all people should know how it feels.
NTA. I remember how awful my period was the first few years and I even ruined a family vacation of my own. I see where your mom is coming from, it sucks to not be able to fully enjoy a vacation but at the end of the day you know your body best and you were aware of how you were feeling and tried to remove yourself from the situation.
NTA, but your parents are the assholes for making you go sightseeing when you requested a rest day. However, you should apologize to your mom for your hurtful comments and your parents owe you an apology for not taking your health/comfort into consideration.
NTA. Your mother should be ashamed of herself. If she tries to get sympathy from you when she’s going through perimenopause symptoms, feel free to remind her of this.
NTA. You said you needed to stay at the hotel and if she had just respected that in the first place, there wouldn’t have been a problem.
Nta it’s not something you can control
NTA, vacation tiredness is real, down days are necessary. Things are thousand times worse when you get your period. Your parents should have helped you better, and not complained. You did t decide this vacation, you didn’t plan, they did.
NTA next time you know to just stay behind no matter what. I’m sorry 🙁
Definitely NTA. I’ve been through similiar situations and it turns out I had endometriosis the whole time Have you been checked for it by any chance?
NTA. Your mom couldn’t give you an ibuprofen to relieve the pain? Couldn’t advocate for you to shut up your brothers? She seems cruel and probably thinks of you as competition. You deserve better.
YTA. Buckle buttercup. Being a woman is not for the weak. Take some ibuprofen and push through it. There are going to be days you will have to work or have other commitments that you can’t just blow off. Be grateful your parents can afford a trip like that. I take it you aren’t an athlete either. Maybe start exercising. It helps reduce the pain.
It should not be this bad for you at such a young age. Look into getting an appointment with a gynecologist so they can rule out things like PCOS, endometriosis, or fibroids. Some may suggest birth control pills- do not let your dad freak out about that. They are NOT just about birth control. They can help regulate your hormones so that your monthly visitor isn’t so horrible. Also they can help with acne. Totally your choice. If they suggest anything like getting a small sample of tissue and it will be just a pinch, demand pain medication because it is not just a pinch, there are nerves there and it will hurt. Best of luck to you and hope you figure things out soon.
NTA. I personally have multiple, embarrassing instances of me fainting in public because I was forced to be anywhere but my bed. One of those times the paramedics were called by an eyewitness, and when they arrived they agreed that it was because of my period. I was 16 years old when it started to get this bad. I’m 25 years old & have to call off on the first day of my period every month because I’m still physically incapable during that time period.
NTA. you go abroad once a year. i think it’s perfectly fine to miss one day, esp if you are in pain and uncomfortable.
NTA. And…
> It was awful, we spent the morning climbing up this hill to see a view of a city from a church,
Oh no. Montmartre on a bad period day? 🙁
YTA. You said 2 weeks long vacation. You have an excuse for 3-4 days.
NTA. I’m sorry your mom didn’t listen to you, and that your parents let your brothers act like little assholes to you. It sounds like they really didn’t take your experiences seriously, and that sucks.
To be really clear here: if anything on the vacation was ruined, it was ruined by your family’s choices: Not letting you rest, not accommodating your needs, and being jerks about it.
NTA – your mother -another woman- telling you essentially to be quiet and be grateful is just so out of line that I can almost guarantee that whatever you said was not nasty enough for what she deserved to be told. She didn’t care about her own daughter’s pain, and does not parent your brothers either, no wonder that you need kind of clarification that you being in pain, nausea etc was not “ruining the vacation”.
Your family not caring was ruining it. They could have easily helped you, they chose not to. That’s just so low. Having your period during holiday already sucks enough, you don’t need family members making it worse by complaining, embarassing you and refusing to help.