My boyfriend and I go out for dinner pretty often and it’s usually a nice experience. Tonight we went to one of my favorite restaurants with another couple and everything was fine during the meal. It’s not a super fine dining place but relatively nice (entrees in the $25-$35 range)
He ordered a Diet Pepsi and his friend ordered a regular Pepsi. The friend’s soda came in a glass bottle and my boyfriend’s came in a smaller can. It was probably a 3-4 ounce difference.
When the bill came, he noticed that the price for both sodas was the same despite his being smaller. He asked the waiter about it and the waiter apologized but said all of the sodas are priced the same at $4. I thought that would be the end of it but my boyfriend’s then asked if he could talk to a manager.
The manager had the same response and my boyfriend was upset he wouldn’t take it off the bill. He kept complaining to the manager, and I was starting to get embarrassed so I offered to just pay the bill, so we could be done with the situation. He didn’t let me pay and continued to have an attitude about it. He left a tip but it was such a turn off for me that I told him my vagina completely dried up.
Obviously he didn’t like that comment and took offense and said he was standing up for himself. There are some circumstances where I can understand complaining but this went on for 10 minutes. Am I crazy or is a $4 soda at a nice restaurant a crazy hill to die on?
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My boyfriend and I go out for dinner pretty often and it’s usually a nice experience. Tonight we went to one of my favorite restaurants with another couple and everything was fine during the meal. It’s not a super fine dining place but relatively nice (entrees in the $25-$35 range)
He ordered a Diet Pepsi and his friend ordered a regular Pepsi. The friend’s soda came in a glass bottle and my boyfriend’s came in a smaller can. It was probably a 3-4 ounce difference.
When the bill came, he noticed that the price for both sodas was the same despite his being smaller. He asked the waiter about it and the waiter apologized but said all of the sodas are priced the same at $4. I thought that would be the end of it but my boyfriend’s then asked if he could talk to a manager.
The manager had the same response and my boyfriend was upset he wouldn’t take it off the bill. He kept complaining to the manager, and I was starting to get embarrassed so I offered to just pay the bill, so we could be done with the situation. He didn’t let me pay and continued to have an attitude about it. He left a tip but it was such a turn off for me that I told him my vagina completely dried up.
Obviously he didn’t like that comment and took offense and said he was standing up for himself. There are some circumstances where I can understand complaining but this went on for 10 minutes. Am I crazy or is a $4 soda at a nice restaurant a crazy hill to die on?
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> I felt like my boyfriend embarrassed me at dinner by being cheap/rude to staff so I made a rude comment about not being attracted to him in that moment. I want to know if I overreacted.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA. This is really embarrassing. Going out to eat with someone who always wants an exception or to talk to the manager is exhausting. What restaurant on earth is going to price their soda by the ounce? Is this common behavior?
I have had both friends and relatives who either wanted a million substitutions on a dish, or were just so picky about service as a way to get out of leaving an appropriate tip. It ruins the meal.
Dude your boyfriend sucks. Arguing even when it was getting embarrassing then sulking afterwards. Did he not check the prices? And why does he care about a difference of $1-2? NTA, obviously, but you really should think about whether you want to be with someone who is this petty.
Weird comment to make. You could’ve communicated in a better way.
Sulking because your friends drink has a splash more than yours is childish and I would of been mortified if I were in your shoes
you’re in a relationship with a jabroni
I think you just wanted to invoke your dessicated vagina. Sometimes when something pisses you off you need to raise a ruckus.
You didn’t say “vagina”, did you? I think that comment was hilarious.
Oh my goodness the size of this red flag. 🚩 NTA
To be frank, BF was upset at your statement only because he’d have to pay for K-Y now.
YTA. Prices should match values, and more people should give a hard time to the staff ans especially the management if they don’t. Your BF did the right thing.
In all honesty, you probably saved his life. One of the leading causes of death for young men is mummification through contact with dessicated vagina; had you said nothing and he tried to initiate sex, he could have died. Notify your city council so you can be nominated for an award! NTA
Where are we getting glass bottles?? I want to eat there. I wouldn’t have used your phrasing, but your BF is weird. NTA.
My vagina would have dried up too if I had one… It’s a shit hill to die on
His behavior was embarrassing for sure. But if I were you, I wouldn’t make the offer to pay the soda with your money. It sounds very insulting even in this case he was the wrong one to start
Question is has he broke up with OP yet?
NTA the lesson here for me is that there’s also a time and place for being right. Pick your battles. Yes, a soda in a glass bottle surely should cost more than a can, but this was something he should have let go. Is he an idealist?
I don’t think it’s the worst trait to have, but it can be problematic if it gets out of control. This is near that line lol.
NTA. I’ve got secondhand embarrassment for you, & can confirm, my hoo-hah is drier than Ben Shapiro’s wife’s.
ESH.
First up: Your boyfriend was in the wrong for harrassing the staff about a minor issue.
On your side though, have a think about how your reaction was one of disgust. You’re making a comment that the act he did made him disgusting to you.
Maybe it’s true. But think about how it feels when your partner, who’s ment to be there to support you, tells you that they find you disgusting. There’s a better way: just say that you disagree, and you think that their behaviour could have been better. No need to jump right into the dry vagina comments.
The title is crazy😭😭😭
NTA. The way he acted towards the server and manager would be a dealbreaker for me. It would dry me up too. Standing up for yourself is one thing but not knowing when to move on is another. A $4 soda is not it. He’s fair to ask about it but he doesn’t get a final say. I bet if he would have asked nicely the server or even manager would have been willing to comp it. But bc he was such a dick they stood on business.
NTA , you can tell a lot about a person from the way they treat service workers. Your comment was a little strange but you were absolutely in the right, telling him you felt uncomfortable in that situation.
NTA. Saying your vagina dried up was a nice way of putting it.
Kind of weird to make a comment relating to your genitals/sex when the situation has nothing to do with that.
If you think certain behavior is unbecoming or inappropriate, there are many much more effective and constructive ways to communicate that.
Maybe I’m the problem, cause I’d complain on principle too 💀
You’re both TA. He created an awful situation, but you certainly made it worse
NTA. If he didn’t want to pay $4 for a soda, he should have checked the prices and not gotten a soda. Also, 10/10 comment 😂 his attitude and actions were so off-putting, idk how anyone could blame you for that
NTA – he acted childish without a good reason to do so.
I’m a man, and my vagina dried up reading that.
My main question to you about him. Why?
NTA
Did it actually dry up or was it a lie to make him feel bad
Esh. You’re mad because he was being inappropriate so you respond by also being inappropriate? Your comment was vulgar and crass. He could’ve just let it go and not patroned there again. You could’ve just said you didn’t like his behavior without referring to your genitals.
He should of had 2 to get his monies worth
ESH. I get what you’re saying, and I also kind of get what he’s saying, especially if the menu isn’t clear about the fact. It’s definitely more a “let’s not go back here again” situation than a talk to the manager situation, but then I also see the argument that if you don’t challenge places on shitty pricing, they feel like they can just get away with it, and will get worse.
But bringing it up to him in terms of your sexual attraction to him is kind of weird too, just have a conversation about the behaviour if the behaviour is an issue, there’s no need to bring your vagina in to it.
ESH.
If your husband said that your comment made his penis soft, people would be telling you to get a restraining order. Both of you have no class.
this is so embarrassing, especially on a double date omg
Nta. In all honesty, I would’ve left without my boyfriend in this situation. My socially anxious ass is not up for standing by a man while he makes a public scene over $1-$2 like a child
ChatGPT:
George: (storming into the restaurant, pacing back and forth)
“Jerry, you wouldn’t believe it. You know that place we always go to? The one with the ‘famous’ chicken salad? I was just in there and—get this—the manager REFUSED to give me a discount on my drink!”
Jerry:
“Wait a second. They refused to give you a discount… on a drink? Why?”
George:
“Because, apparently, ‘they can’t just change the prices for one person.’ Well, I’m sorry, but I don’t understand why my small drink costs the same as your large drink!”
Jerry: (smirking)
“Well, that’s just how prices work, George.”
George:
“No, no, no! This is about fairness! I’ve got a small drink, a tiny drink—it’s basically a shot of soda. And yet, somehow, it’s the same price as your giant soda—your bucket of Coke!” (throws hands up in the air) “It’s an injustice, Jerry!”
Jerry:
“You’re not saving any money. You’re just stressing yourself out over a small beverage.”
George:
“No, no, Jerry, it’s the principle! The principle of the thing! Why should I pay the same for less? It’s a travesty!” (leans in, all serious) “And when I asked the manager about it, he says: ‘Well, sir, that’s our pricing structure.’ I said, ‘What structure? Are you charging me based on the size of my drink, or the size of my soul?’”
Jerry:
“Did he get it?”
George:
“He gave me this look—like I was the one who had the problem. ‘Sir, we’re not in the business of negotiating drink prices,’ he says. Like he’s running a car dealership!” (mocking tone) “‘Oh, sir, you’re getting a premium soda experience, don’t you worry.’”
Jerry:
“Did you at least get a refill?”
George:
“I asked! I said, ‘Hey, I’m paying full price, I should at least get a refill.’ He looks me dead in the eye and says: ‘The refill is free, but the principle of it is still the same.’”
Jerry:
“So… you paid full price for a tiny drink, then you got another tiny drink for free?”
George:
“Exactly! But the principle, Jerry! The principle!”
He should choose his battles. Having to stand up for himself over something so trivial shows insecurity.
Are you on a Curb your Enthusiasm episode?
NTA. He sounds insufferable tbh. Grow up bro.
This is hilarious.
1000% NTA. And carry on using that phrase. It’s brilliant.
NTA. That’s sad and embarrassing.
Out of interest what were the sizes of the bottle and can?
Nicht über ein Problem zu reden, indem es um Loyalität geht, sondern eine Sexkarte zu spielen sagt viel über dich, auch wenn er stark übertrieben reagiert hat.
ESH
YTA absolutely. He is fa tually fully correct, and even if you are annoyed what jobs of comment is this? Simply tell him you do not agree, but not something that impress you are disgusted with him
Lol okay, today I went to the San Diego zoo and thought I was robbed of 7 bucks because I could’ve SWORN I saw the cashier press a 7 dollar tip button.
I didn’t make it a massive deal but I did need to ask several people to confirm. I was just so certain… it make me angry to think someone tried to get one over me.
It has nothing do with me losing 7 dollars and absolutely everything to do with me believing someone was being disingenuous
NTA yikes
My god. I would have doubled down if I were you babes.
But INFO: did you say it in front of the other couple or when you were alone together.
Edit: it wouldn’t change anything honestly but I’m just asking because it might be that he was offended you said it in public.
Either way I think NTA
Loser. Dump him. Has no sense of what really matters. He will mess up your kids if you ever have any. Next.
OP as a gay man my bussy dried out in solidarity with you. I’ve never in my life understood why people think it’s ok to treat service workers and complain about something with no end in sight unless they get what they want. Especially when’s he’s upset his friend got a different soda that was a tinsey bit more flavored sugar water in the bottle.
Man. A lot of shoes to fill.
If I were bf I would have asked about it, asked for a price change, then upon denial just left a bad review. I think it’s really unscrupulous of the restaurant to price gauge like that. But I worked in restaurants for years so I never harass staff about anything unless it’s a truly horrible experience.
If I were the manager, which I’ve been myself, I would have just comp’d the diet Pepsi. It’s a fucking diet Pepsi. It costs the restaurant at most 10 cents. Weigh that against a return customer and it’s a no-brainer.
If I were the Gf I’d have been wicked pissed if my bf acted that way so nta.
NTA
IMO, people who say otherwise are just upset about you not filtering.
IDT nothing was wrong with what you said. People like your BF are annoying ASF. All drinks at restaurants, especially dine in ones, are gonna be the same price. The only time they are different prices is when they are different categories. Such as the things on the children’s menu, water is usually free if it’s not bottled, coffee is a different price, and especially the alcohol section.
Outside of the typical fast food places, I have seen prices for a soft drink be any where from $2 to $9. He’ll be ‘ight. Lol
Not passing judgement either way, but if I paid $30 for a meal and they brought my soda to the table in a can, I’d never set foot in that dumpster again.
Sounds like a shitty place if they won’t take a dollar or two off the bill to make a customer happy.
NTA, you can’t control your vagina, but I think there’s probably more going on if your boyfriend disputing a bill makes you completely not attracted to him.
I’m guessing he is an accountant? And your NTA. Some people have peeves that they can’t let go, like getting constantly ripped out just a little bit from everything, and sometimes you have just had enough. You will only know if you talk to them about it.
YTA depending on how exactly he communicated his frustration, this is a normal thing to complain about. If companies get away with making things smaller and charging the same without people even complaining about it, where will it end? He is fighting the good fight.
You should ask him what he’s really mad at. If he’s not. I would definitely have to have ralk about how you treat other people and where you draw the lines. Cause sounds to me he’s mad at something or someone else as to the way he’s treating others
NTA. Totally mortifying! He’s lucky you didn’t break up with him acting like that in a public place!
idk I’m waffling between NTA and ESH, but I’m leaning more towards ESH
while the way your boyfriend behaved over a soda was completely ridiculous, there were far better ways to communicate that you were turned off by his behavior, which leads me to a question – does he have a pattern of acting this way, or no? I can understand why you’d maybe jump to a statement like you did if he had a history of acting this way over minor slights, but if this is a new thing then it probably would have been better if you’d taken a different tact and had a more reasonable response to his behavior.
tl;dr ESH, he was being ridiculous over something little and stupid, and acted like a child over the price of a soda, but you also jumped straight to the nuclear comment and said something crass and harsh, when you could have just as easily made your point without hurting him or causing another fight. that being said, I can understand to a certain extent why you felt provoked to say what you did if he’s acted like this before.
Leave him. Leave!
Nta
Having sodas at a nice restaurant is a childish thing to start with, not wine or at least a mocktail if driving.
The whole arguing over a couple dollars is certainly unappealing behavior too.