My MIL (Nigerian if that matters) and I have always had a good relationship (from my understanding) however suddenly, the day after I married my husband (her son) I found out that she opened all of our wedding cards. This is something the bride and groom does together but no- she opens all of the cards. My husband had been in defense of his mother and says that ” I don’t have my priorities straight ” and “his family paid for the wedding ” blah blah … wtf? Why would any in-laws need to open any wedding cards? I asked my MIL if she knew who opened the cards and that I find that to be disrespectful. Her response was to call my husband yelling and hyperventilating , basically putting on a show. I personally look at her completely different now that she’s crossed clear boundaries and betrayed my privacy in that way. Am I overreacting? AITA?
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My MIL (Nigerian if that matters) and I have always had a good relationship (from my understanding) however suddenly, the day after I married my husband (her son) I found out that she opened all of our wedding cards. This is something the bride and groom does together but no- she opens all of the cards. My husband had been in defense of his mother and says that ” I don’t have my priorities straight ” and “his family paid for the wedding ” blah blah … wtf? Why would any in-laws need to open any wedding cards? I asked my MIL if she knew who opened the cards and that I find that to be disrespectful. Her response was to call my husband yelling and hyperventilating , basically putting on a show. I personally look at her completely different now that she’s crossed clear boundaries and betrayed my privacy in that way. Am I overreacting? AITA?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I messaged my MIL ” do you know who opened our wedding cards? I find that very disrespectful ” . She felt as though I was disrespectful to ask the question. My husband was/ is very angry with me texting his mom and says that I didn’t have my priorities straight. Although I didn’t accuse any one of anything, I asked who did it.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
Did she take all the money in them?
Those weddings cards had money it them
No. MIL crossed the line. Husband should have your back. She was being nosy and disrespectful. They were not for her. Doesn’t matter if she paid for the wedding or not.
Unless he changes and puts you first instead of his mom, this already could be the beginning of the end. I hope I’m wrong.
I wish you luck.
Was the money in the cards left in the cards?
My ex MIL opened all the cards and presents and put everything away the day after the wedding. NTA. People suck.
NTA and ask your husband how you are supposed to write thank you cards without knowing what people sent to you?
NTA
If you need to justify why this was a problem, let your husband (and through him your mother in law) know that you needed to know what was in the cards in order to write proper thank you notes. Now you will not know if anybody sent what kind of gifts, and your notes will indicate that you never received it, if there was money or gift cards. This means the entire family will think of you and your husband as ungrateful and rude, and some may even ask if you never received what was in the cards.
Then sit down with your husband and make him help you write those notes.
You just got a glimpse of the rest of your marriage. Proceed accordingly.
OP, that money is gone. your husband doesn’t respect you, he is in his mamas pocket. did you do a Nigerian money dance at the wedding? are you Nigerian?
No! I would be worried if cash was missing too based on her clear disregard for your privacy and boundaries!
Holy flaming jollof