I (27M) started a new job about 6 months back and at some point had to train the new guy(M), we don’t hire many people as we are a smaller restaurant and don’t need a large staff. He seemed awkward and socially uncomfortable and I felt that as I have similar social anxiety issues. we’ve been chatting for a few weeks now and have really gotten along, I don’t make friends well but he’s been understanding and even pretty fun to hang out with after work at a bar or shooting pool. My other friend at work (J) came over last night and as we were chilling he showed me a mugshot of M and the charge related was sexual assault of a minor under 15, it was absolutely undeniably him. I have previous trauma from childhood concerning SA and am absolutely uncomfortable being around M now, I get people change and things happen that we grow from, I myself have had a pretty checkered past with the law BUT never anything as heinous as that. There’s a saying I agree with quite a bit, “you don’t fuck with kids, the elderly, or the disabled” it’s just not right. That said in my past if a person like this were in my space it would be on sight. I have grown and don’t want to handle things like that anymore, I’ve thought about telling my boss or outright letting him know I know and don’t like him, but I’m afraid to cause problems in our pretty peaceful kitchen. how do I go about making my opinions clear in a professional and calm manner while still letting this dude know not to talk to me or be near me?
TLDR, My coworker I’ve became friends with has recently been outed as a predator, would I be the asshole for telling people or telling him point blank to leave me alone?
Ps. I work with in like 2 hours so I’m not sure how this is gonna go
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I (27M) started a new job about 6 months back and at some point had to train the new guy(M), we don’t hire many people as we are a smaller restaurant and don’t need a large staff. He seemed awkward and socially uncomfortable and I felt that as I have similar social anxiety issues. we’ve been chatting for a few weeks now and have really gotten along, I don’t make friends well but he’s been understanding and even pretty fun to hang out with after work at a bar or shooting pool. My other friend at work (J) came over last night and as we were chilling he showed me a mugshot of M and the charge related was sexual assault of a minor under 15, it was absolutely undeniably him. I have previous trauma from childhood concerning SA and am absolutely uncomfortable being around M now, I get people change and things happen that we grow from, I myself have had a pretty checkered past with the law BUT never anything as heinous as that. There’s a saying I agree with quite a bit, “you don’t fuck with kids, the elderly, or the disabled” it’s just not right. That said in my past if a person like this were in my space it would be on sight. I have grown and don’t want to handle things like that anymore, I’ve thought about telling my boss or outright letting him know I know and don’t like him, but I’m afraid to cause problems in our pretty peaceful kitchen. how do I go about making my opinions clear in a professional and calm manner while still letting this dude know not to talk to me or be near me?
TLDR, My coworker I’ve became friends with has recently been outed as a predator, would I be the asshole for telling people or telling him point blank to leave me alone?
Ps. I work with in like 2 hours so I’m not sure how this is gonna go
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
NTA! He did the crime, now he has to live with those consequences. I would just be careful in approaching him because who knows how he will react – I would avoid him rather than directly tell him you intend to.