AITAH for having a threesome with my friend’s ex?

r/

So a few months ago my gf and her best friend wanted to have a threesome with me and shit who the hell was I to turn down every dude’s fantasy doing 2 chicks at the same time? Except the problem was that my gf’s best friend was a good friend’s ex. So I talked to my friend about it and he said that he was cool with it and that it’s not really his business since they’ve been broken up for quite a while now.

Now fast forward to a few days ago and apparently he told our friend group about what happened and pretty much everyone agreed (including the same friend who apparently changed his mind) that what I did was a dick move.

My gf and her best friend did warn me to keep it hush hush and now they’re laughing at me for not listening to them.

Comments

  1. LuigiMPLS Avatar

    You sound young enough to enjoy the threesome and not worry about the consequences later in life, so enjoy it while it’s fresh but remember in the future that some memories are best kept unsaid.

  2. AlwaysHelpful22 Avatar

    There is a lot of wisdom coming from the two chicks in your threesome (which is something I never thought I would type). You have no one to blame but yourself for not maintaining more discretion. NAH.

  3. Sae-chotic Avatar

    Hey listen you enjoyed and now people who are shit talking are just jealous of you. They have got nothing better to do other than talk. You should’ve kept your mouth shut but I get it. It is kinda an achievement

  4. ConfidenceAny1138 Avatar

    Yes you are the jerk 😂😂 even though he said you COULD doesn’t mean he is GOOD with it, even considering having sex with a mates ex is a d*** move. If you did want to do it definitely should have listened to your gf 🙂‍↔️

  5. MissSassyVibes Avatar

    Bruh, the real MVPs here are the gals for warning ya lol 🥲

  6. SiHall1983 Avatar

    NTA but you’re kinda naive… people love drama!

  7. Mean_Prize5459 Avatar

    Meh, NTAH for having the threesome. If your friend felt a certain type of way about it, he should have had the guts to say so when you asked him. Now he wants to play the victim? Nah bro.

    But in the future, you should realize that just because you can, doesn’t mean you should. Thinking with the little head can be fun, but it often leads to bad decisions sooner or later.

  8. Sal_Pairadice Avatar

    Depends how in love he/ they were and how it ended. If it was just dating and he broke up with her, then this should be no problem. If she was the love of his life and she broke his heart, then you are an AH. I’m betting on the second scenario.

  9. MiserableFloor9906 Avatar

    NAH, who cares what the jealous think.

  10. Electrical_Treat_301 Avatar

    YTA a little bit for ignoring their request to keep it quiet & for rubbing it in your friend’s face.

    It’s widely known not to fuck the ex-partners of your friends unless you’re willing to risk the friendship. If you have to ask if they’d be okay with it, you ought to know they’ll probably still feel weird even if they aren’t comfortable saying they don’t want you to.

  11. acesytren Avatar

    NTA but you are stupid for being told by the girls to not say anything and then you immediately say something.

  12. FLFoxnessMonster Avatar

    NTA. You did follow bro code first and made sure that he was cool with it. He on the other hand is acting like a woman. He never should have agreed to something if he didn’t really mean it.

  13. _-_Blank_- Avatar

    On one hand this story could be different in a month or two and then it would be “I didn’t want to hurt my friends feelings when I had a 3some with his my gf and his ex” trying to ask ya guy if it was ok was the correct move but also their reactions are a bit justified.

    NTAH and hopefully yall can move past this.

  14. ass-to-trout12 Avatar

    Depends how good a friend this guy was.

  15. swishcandot Avatar

    YTA to yourself for telling your buddy, and kind of an AH for banging his ex, you think that wasn’t calculated? 

  16. Entire-Huckleberry53 Avatar

    Next time just keep your mouth shut.

  17. FlounderKind8267 Avatar

    I don’t think you’re an AH. I do think you’re pretty foolish for doing that though.

  18. SharpenedGourd Avatar

    I mean, NTA but I agree with your gf and her bf lmao. This was like, very predictable.

    Whenever dating or sleeping with a friend’s ex or ex crush or whatever, lots of people say “yeah I’m fine with it” but you gotta mentally prepare yourself for the about 50% of that bunch that aren’t, in fact, fine with it. 

  19. RabbitGlass5578 Avatar

    You should have kept quiet. You probably have ruin another opportunity to do that again.

  20. Beneficial_Pen_9395 Avatar

    Ok, let’s imagine this scenario differently:

    Imagine that group of friends is like “3-some with his ex? That’s cool.”

    What is that going to mean when one of their exes gets in on a threesome with you, or someone else? It would bother them. That is why they didn’t sit back and say it was cool. They wouldn’t be cool with it if it were their ex, that’s all.

    Idk if this makes u TAH or not. What is ur friend gonna do? Deny you a threesome out of his bruised ego? It all depends on the sincerity of those conversations. I tell ya what tho, you would be the Platinum Standard of a friend had you said NO, SHE IS MY FRIEND’S EX.

  21. BigFail4402 Avatar

    you did violate the bro code, so there‘s that

  22. Barbosa003 Avatar

    YTA for blabbin’.

  23. emanekaf2222 Avatar

    NAH. You asked permission, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t consequences. Congrats on the sex.

  24. Traditional-River377 Avatar

    Never discuss your sexual activities with anyone other than the involved person/party. That way if something leaks out you know where it came from. There wasn’t any reason to discuss with someone ex so you’ve learned a lesson.

  25. benlogna Avatar

    You asked PERMISSION from an unrelated man? How grossly misogynistic of you..

  26. vaisatriani Avatar

    NTA.

    Those friends who are turning on you? They’re just jealous.

  27. just-a-simple-song Avatar

    YTA but you still won.

  28. Potatoskinsumo Avatar

    YTI for blabbering. Also…nice.

  29. PleaseDontBanMe82 Avatar

    NTA.

    I don’t think an ex should ever be off limits to anyone but family.

  30. EhhhhhhWhatever Avatar

    Woulda kept that one to yourself, bud.

  31. gutierra Avatar

    You had a 3some? We want DETAILS!!!

  32. Aidyn_the_Grey Avatar

    NTA cause dude told you to go for it.

    Hopefully you learned your lesson, don’t hookup with friends’ exes.

  33. teksmith Avatar

    Reverse the situation and reflect on how you would feel. Not saying YTA but its probably not conducive to relationship building.

  34. Famous-Ad-2418 Avatar

    All these people sound toxic af

  35. Odd-Business-9426 Avatar

    That’s a dick move… bro code never screw your friend’s ex. Unless you don’t care about your friend. Put yourself in his shoes and you have your answer.

  36. Jay-Rad85 Avatar

    Should have kept it hush hush and kept the train to pound town operating on time bruh.

  37. ResidentAllie Avatar

    Pretty sure your friend got laughed at first, for saying he doesn’t care about the threesome. So he changed his stance. If anyone brings it up just say, “hey I had threesome and you didn’t. If it bothers you, go find someone to do it with. If it doesn’t, STFU. Don’t bring your insecurities to me”.

    Ask your friends to eff off. You did right asking first and that’s that. If people have a problem, ask them to hold on to their gfs for dear life. Tell them, if you break up with her, I get to have another threesome. Eff that shit.

  38. paperhalo Avatar

    Ha. Dick move.

  39. FrancieNolan13 Avatar

    lol upu asked first bur you’re a dumbass for bragging

  40. Longryderr Avatar

    You are the ahole for telling everyone. Are you 12 ?

  41. Super_Tradition4788 Avatar

    Sounds like you cant keep your mouth shut that will never happen again !! If you kept your mouth shut it could gappen all the time.You fucked up

  42. Advanced_Parsnip Avatar

    Gentleman never talk or tell

  43. Deep-Carpenter-8426 Avatar

    Note to yourself: there are literally billions of people in the world to pick from. None of them need to be your Friends Ex-GF/Wife.

  44. SlapWorez72 Avatar

    Better to ask forgiveness rather than permission I this situation.

  45. MaxProPlus1 Avatar

    Bro, heard of bro code? You ignored the bros before hoes etiquette.

    This is fake

  46. Odd_Welcome7940 Avatar

    Why do we care?

    You got the go ahead. What he thinks after is his own fault and all these friend’s opinions beyond that are useless. I just hope you did good and get to do it again a few times.

    Good luck

  47. KNpatts Avatar

    It’s generally a big no-no to fuck around with a friend’s ex even if they gave permission, but now that you’ve done it, you have to face the consequences of your actions.
    If the opportunity ever happens again, maybe don’t do that?

  48. Traditional-Tank3994 Avatar

    You tried a little too hard to be fair and it blew up on you. They’re broken up so there was no need but as you probably know, blabbing about a threesome is a worse move than sleeping with someone’s ex. Hard lesson learned I hope.

  49. dayz2trad3 Avatar

    Not a real friend if you asked they said cool then changed their mind.

  50. Matchaaal0ver Avatar

    What kind of friend wants to have sex with their good friend’s ex lmao

  51. Emotional_Award7077 Avatar

    You should have kept your mouth shut lol.

  52. Weary-Package-7293 Avatar

    And then you go and tell everyone on Reddit. You ain’t the AH for the threesome, but that’s some weak shit by flexing

  53. high5s4smiles Avatar

    Now you can let your buddy know how his dick tastes..

  54. ContributionNext4918 Avatar

    Sounds like Orange office

  55. Secret-Sample1683 Avatar

    That’s what you get for bragging. Should’ve kept it a secret like the girls suggested.

  56. Agreeable_Way_9991 Avatar

    Pro tip: I’ve lived this sort of strife so by experience I recommend always keeping intimacy and your friend group separate be it with your gf, an ex theirs, a four way or whatever. Drama always arises. Furthermore, since you did, you weren’t wrong to tell your friend but you have to have the emotional IQ to separate words from brain reality. His “i dont care” also had a reason “we arent together anymore” almost as if he’s convincing himself. He cared, or at least was jealous. The world is so far from black and white between words and meaning/hidden meaning ANYTIME women are involved or your communicating with women. We are just wired different and men are unpredictable with that topic, even “bro’s”. I hope you aren’t, but if you’re betrayed by a pseudo friend this will sink in.

  57. Darnell_06 Avatar

    You messed up any future 3somes cause now women know you’re a Chatty Chad

  58. DawgH8R Avatar

    NTA, you observed bro code. Your friend ITAH for airing it out, probably in an attempt to sloot shame his ex.

  59. esmithedm Avatar

    100% a dick move on your part. Forget her being a friends ex, what kind of idiot goes around telling everyone that the two wanted a threesome with him. I bet they sure regret it was him they choose. You really needed to go around asking ex boyfriends for permission? Everyone needed to know and be ok with it? learn to be discrete, They 100% did not want you going around blabbering about it.

    YTA

  60. TB12ROY33 Avatar

    You climbed the mountain so many have not. Be proud son. It was worth any slack you get.

  61. suchasuchasuch Avatar

    So this is all just a brag post about having two naked girls in your bed. Come back when you have something more impressive to share.

  62. Additional_Coast_568 Avatar

    Yeah man you’re a complete dickhead.

    You fucked your friends ex and bragged about it

  63. imaoldguy Avatar

    Definitely broke the bro code. But worth it i hope!

  64. TherealDaily Avatar

    YTA and if I were your friend I’d put hands on you

  65. max_2213 Avatar

    Bro code first, shutting TF up 2nd

  66. somethingsimple89535 Avatar

    Doesn’t matter. You had a three way, and not the bad kind.

  67. bluecollardaaddy Avatar

    First off! Keep your mouth shut! Second, never have a threesome with friends. It never ends well.

  68. Nice-Pomegranate2915 Avatar

    Your NTA . But now after receiving the pleasure of the threesome now you receive the pain ! Your girlfriend and her best friend were right . Take their laughter with good grace .

  69. sammagee33 Avatar

    This bro code or gal code is so stupid. Date/hook up with whomever you want to.

  70. HUNGWHITEBOI25 Avatar

    NTA for having the threeway

    but YTA for telling people after being told not to lol

  71. bobp929 Avatar

    NTA BUT should have kept that on the down low.

    Let them be mad, you still got those memories

  72. PeanutButtHer Avatar

    YTA, you fucked around, now it’s time you found out haha

  73. KindaTheChamp Avatar

    I will never understand why people care about who their ex sleeps with.

  74. _The_Shredder_ Avatar

    We have a saying in my country “quem come calado, come dobrado”. Something like “he who eats/fucks quietly, eats/fucks twice as much”.

    You didn’t do it quietly, so you probably won’t do it again.

    Note: Come or comer can mean to eat or to fuck depending on context.

  75. Thronggler Avatar

    YTA for asking him in the first place. It’s your friend’s ex-gf of course he’s going to have some personal issues with that. Man, imagine him asking if he could have sex with your girlfriend if you weren’t together. Might be hard to imagine, but it’s definitely something to keep under wraps if you can’t resist. Your friend is an idiot for pretending to himself that it wouldn’t bother him.

  76. ZephNightingale Avatar

    Maybe NTA but definitely dumb as hell😆

  77. SubarcticFarmer Avatar

    NTA, but not the brightest bulb in the house, are we?

    At least they think it’s funny. Tell them if you ask do it again you’ll do it right this time.

  78. Mattyjones3 Avatar

    Yeah you’re not very smart.

  79. AltLangSyne Avatar

    YTA. Partially for what (or rather who!) you did, but mostly for opening your damn trap about it.

  80. Hour-Summer-4422 Avatar

    Can’t teach common sense. That you asked doesn’t mean it didn’t feel like a betrayal and what is he going to say anyway?

    You chose your priorities and made your bed. Nobody can trust a friend like this. Hope it was worth it 🤷‍♂️

  81. GonzoTheGreat22 Avatar

    Nope. YTA for saying something when two naked women are telling you not to. Dummy.

  82. tacocatacocattacocat Avatar

    Well your dick did move…

  83. Subject_Low146 Avatar

    You only live once!! F that guy😂

  84. remstage Avatar

    You chose a threesome over a friend.

  85. just-jake Avatar

    are you braindead? shut ur mouth next time 

  86. FFaddict13 Avatar

    Eskimo brother is salty.

  87. YouGottaRollReddit Avatar

    A lot here saying YTA. So may as well do it again!

  88. Caitito Avatar

    Yes, you are an AH. You did this to a good friend? What do you do to your enemies? Fuck their mom?

    I remember having ‘friends’ like you when I was 20. Dropped them faster than a steaming pile of shit.

    Maybe I’m jaded, but the girls aren’t stupid. They’re definitely smarter than you, but that’s a pretty low bar to begin with. Sounds like a revenge fuck more than anything.

  89. Dense-Character- Avatar

    > every dude’s fantasy doing 2 chicks at the same time

    But dudes only have 1 dick.

  90. EntertainerSea9653 Avatar

    Bro u messed up big time. Its a complex to have to tell someone else about ur sex adventures, as if u need to feel a certain anount of validation from other people to feel good about it. Next time keep ur bedroom or anyroom adventures for that matter to urself.

  91. DickHopschteckler Avatar

    Humblebrag elsewhere, yungun