My BIL (38M) has a step son (10M) with autism. He has visited a lot in the past and I used to like having him here and hanging out with my daughter (12F), until I found out what he did.
My BIL told me about when he r@ped another kid in his school.. 10 months ago in the school yard. He was literally swimming in the pool with my daughter as he told me this. I felt uncomfortable but didn’t ask him to get out of the pool.
A while after they left, I called up my BIL and told him his step son is no longer allowed near mt daughter because of that past incident. They are both old enough to not be watched constantly and I don’t want to take a chance.
Comments
NTA, that’s totally reasonable to protect your daughter, your kid’s safety comes first no matter what!
Thank God you drew the line. It doesn’t matter what the kids problem is; he’s a rapist. Keep your daughter safe.
Definitely NTA. I’d say that’s a pretty reasonable response!
NTA your daughter’s safety comes before your BIL’s feelings. Good on you for protecting your child.
If what he said is correct, then you absolutely did what you should.
It sounds almost unbelievable though that a ten year old was able to rape someone in a schoolyard. Is it possible that he touched someone inappropriately which counted as sexual assault and BIL used the wrong terminology or doesn’t know the difference? Not that that would be ok, but its a situation I would ask for some clarity on.
NTA just remove autistic from your story.
Your BIL’s StepSon raped another child recently. The end.
Good for you for protecting your daughter regardless.
Whaaaatttt? And he just dropped that on you casually? He should also not want his stepson around ANY girl, why would he do that? He knows he is putting OP’s daughter in danger. This makes no sense to me I’m really hoping it’s not true…
Edit: and what does being autistic have to do with this story?
NTA, you need to protect your daughter. Did the stepson get any counseling or therapy to learn from his mistake and learn proper behavior?
NTA but how did it take 10 months to tell you?
Autism has nothing to do with rape. It’s likely this boy has been raped himself and acting it out.
Ask BIL if he’s in therapy because it will get worse if he doesn’t.
How the fuck did a 10 year old rape anyone 10 months ago?!!!!
The way that child would just disappear is fkn CRAZY my guy…
Straight to the point. Nice job, momma bear
My big question is, how did a 10 year old rape another kid? At school? How were they not being supervised long enough for one kid to literally penetrate another child? Is this child low-functioning, or is he not? I feel like there is more to this story. Either way, NTA because it’s your kid and you can keep whomever you want away from her. I think some clarification on the story is needed though.
100% nta. Don’t let him ever be alone with your kid. Bil clearly shouldn’t be allowed around the kids either if he’s shown such latent disregard for your child’s safety.
Did he not get punished? NTA
Whaaat?!??! How is it possible this rapist was not prosecuted? Being autistic doesn’t give someone a pass to engage in criminal behavior. And being 10 y/o doesn’t give rise to the excuse of not knowing something is wrong. Yes, keep your daughter safe, that’s your primary concern. But, damn, that’s some crazy bullshit. Also, have you checked in with your daughter to make sure the little rapist hasn’t done anything to daughter?
NTA. The reason only matters to an extent, you’re priority should be protecting yoyr daughter from the potential consequences before they happen. But… if a 10 year old child did that to someone. It has probably happened to him too. That is not something that would a child who hasn’t even hit puberty yet should just conceive of himself. And he is (hopefully!) too young to have viewed any kind of violent porn. So if he did that, that young, I wouldn’t be surprised if someone has done it to him too. (I would be VERY surprised if no one had, and he really had just thought of it on his own). I have a 9 year old cousin and he doesn’t even know how babies are made yet!
NTA at all.
This is rage bait
If this is a true story and not Fake NTA
But this story is really questionable
How would a 10yo be able to gRape someone in a schoolyard and no one notice or stop him?
How would a 10yo know how to gRape another child? Who has harmed this 10yo boy to know that if, is BIL not concerned about abuse from another relative or friend of the family or heck a teacher? (Again if this is real)
Is BIL not having 10yo in therapy?
Did BIL and stepson “disappear” for a few months while this was happening for you to feel like it was legit?
Did BIL factually tell the story and was it not period inappropriate touching/“accidental” SA (I use accidental because unless a 10yo has been exposed or has been SA’d themself usually it’s more due to curiosity and exploration of sensation vs the aggravated act of true assault but if they have trauma then is very well can be aggravated)
This just seems… a lot even for Reddit
This just seems like it’s missing a LOT on context…I’m not saying it’s not true…I know sh*t like this does happen…but I don’t know…to be clear, it’s not just the step son you shouldn’t want around your daughter- it’s also your BIL and possibly your sister??? You make it sound like BIL doesn’t think it’s a big deal- which is an issue (and why I say more context is needed). And also the boy learned these actions somewhere- he’s only TEN and autistic, so they clearly don’t care about age appropriate/mental growth appropriate content OR he’s, unfortunately, also experienced this.
NTA. Protect your child at all costs.
A 10 year old raped a girl? I mean, shouldn’t he be at therapy, not at the pool? That’s very serious. NTA.
That’s a fair decision. You need to protect your daughter.
Being autistic has no bearing here.
He’s likely also being abused, unfortunately.
NTA.
A parent’s first responsibility is to nurture, protect, and love their children. You did all three. The fact that his step son is autistic, in no way prevents others from protecting their children from him.
Well that’s a scary thought, that strength (iykyk) and unpredictability. But unfortunately probably more common than they make known. NTA you can’t take the risk. Lil guy is too dangerous and will just get bigger and bigger. That’s Bils burden not yours.
YTA. This is a bullshit story and your an AH for putting it here.
NTA. His autism doesn’t even really matter; if he’s raping other kids then he’s dangerous.
That said, you should urge his parents to find whoever is raping their son and deal with the problem appropriately. This is not something normal 10-year-olds do, be they neurotypical, autistic, or otherwise. Someone is teaching him to do this.
NTA. That’s a serious concern and your daughter’s safety comes first. Trust your instincts on this one!!