I (30F) have been talking to this man (40m) for 4 days. He’s military, seems really nice, very handsome, etc. On day 2 of us talking, he asks me for $25 so he can get some fast food. I tell him that 1) I don’t just give out money to people and 2) I currently have a negative balance in my account. I can’t even get gas to fill up my car. I am traveling to work on a quarter tank and a prayer until payday. He says it’s not a problem. I’m like okay, that’s the end of it.
Today, he messages me saying he’s had a bad day. When I ask why, he said it’s because he hasn’t eaten and can I give him $25 for fast food. He says that he swears he’ll pay me back when he gets paid and that even $10 would be enough for him to get something. Again, I tell him that I’m not just gonna give him money. It’s nothing against him, I just don’t know him.
He says that we have been talking for a little over 4 days, and yet I’m still saying I don’t know him, and he’s only asking for $25. Then he says he “understands and it was nice meeting me”.
In my opinion, talking to me and showing interest in me doesn’t entitle you to my money. Especially after ONLY 4 DAYS! So, AITAH?
Comments
Might be worth the $25 to get rid of him.
NTA and you just talked to a Nigerian prince babe
Block him
girllllll wth are you doing talking to this man, please do your self a favour and block him. Thanks
Huge red flag. Scam account? Block him.
ghost him
He’s a scammer
Scam block him asap
He’s a bum. Move on. It’s shocking you need others to tell you this
If he’s military, why doesn’t he go eat on base/post for free? I’m guessing it’s because he’s lying.
lol this person is cat fishing you for money. Delete and block
NTA. He’s a scammer. Stop all contact and block his number.
It is a scammer.
Scam! Run.
Also, why would you even remotely want to be with someone hitting you up for money four days in? He’s a scammer, and even if he wasn’t, he sounds like a mooch. Keep looking.
No — he is a scammer — military people don’t need money.
Scam
You are NTA! He’s the AH! You don’t ask for money from someone just met! Maybe your buddy you’ve known for years, but not a woman you just started talking to.
This seems very fishy to me. How many other people is he talking to and asking them for money??
you deserve someone better than that, girl
Have you met this ‘person’ or just talked ? Don’t be naive, you’re being set up for a scam
NTA. There are food banks where he can get food from.
Omgosh stop talking with him he’s a grifter! Yta to yourself! Have some standards!
Military personnel can eat in the base commissary they won’t starve, whomever that was, they were scamming you
Testing the waters, if you sent it next time would have been $50-100 for “an emergency” and so on…
NTA
Scammer!! Block immediately!
I just watched an ‘American Greed’ episode that was all about romance scams that start exactly like this. They all pretended to be American military, too.
Catfish. If he’s in the military, he has food. If he doesn’t have a buddy who will buy him a burger, he’s not in the military.
source: i’m an Army veteran who both bought and borrowed.
NTA – I don’t have a lot of rules for my life but the one that I do have is I don’t lend out money. It’s just awkward to ask for it, if they don’t have it then it’s just an awkward situation so I just don’t do it
Block and delete this guy asap
You’ve been catfished, NTA and move on. Ps, even if he did prove who he was through FaceTime or something, he’s still a scammer.
Yikes. This dude is way too broke to be dating…
NTA.
MRE or food at the chowhall.
Have you physically met this man? This just sounds like someone trying to scam you
The US military feeds its soldiers. NTA, block this fraud.
100% you are talking to some guy in Nigeria who is scamming you. It’s a romance scammer. Go to the r/Scams and search for romance scams.
The military provides food, and he’s a scammer who is wasting your time. Move on.
If he is in the military he eats for free on base
You mentioned that he’s very handsome. He probably does this all the time, scamming chicks out of money because he’s used to getting away with it. I think it’s hilarious that you refused and now he’s pouting like a little bitch. Good on you.
Never give money to someone you just met.
You can get bread and peanut butter for about $4 for the great value brand. If you were really hungry it is amazing what you would settle for at the grocery store. $25 for fast food when he is begging you for money? Scammer. But i would tell him to hit up a food pantry.. then see what he does.
I don’t think bro is military unless he joined the navy at 39 😂
give him 25 cents
It’s a scam dear.
NTA but neither one of you are in a position to be dating or talking to anyone.
nta
Just ask him for $50 because you’re starving and can’t afford to buy food. Then give him $25 so he can buy lunch. Tell him you’ll pay the $50 back when he pays the $25 back.
Red flag! Sirens blaring. Block him. Anyone asking for money after only talking for a few days is a scammed. You give him $25 today, he’ll come up with some excuse for not being able to pay you back and before you know it, he’ll ask for $50/$100.
My cousin (she wanted someone to love her so bad) she was dating a man like this, she gave him her truck to drive and she drove his busted car, she watched his kids, she cleaned his clothes, worked door dash 14 hours a day and give him the check.
She died and he didn’t even go to her funeral.
Don if you’re reading this, FUCK YOU.
Block!
He’s lying. Military guys get fed.
If he’s military he can eat on base/post . They will take it out of his check. Unless he already lives on base/post. Then it’s in his housing plan.
Lmao. Let him be on his way. Block him so he can’t come back. Welcome to the world of online dating scams.
Lol. Block that number.
OK, there are multiple problems here. 1. You’re talking to a guy that can’t afford to even feed himself and he’s 40. Instead of buying groceries he prefers fast food. This means he’s broke and financially irresponsible. 2. You have a job and have a negative balance and can’t afford gas. This means that your financially irresponsible as well. Your budgeting skills lack and you can’t support yourself. 3. You consider texting as getting to know someone. No, it doesn’t work this way, you get to know someone face to face.
You need to work on yourself and become stable before you drag someone else into your mess. When/if you meet someone you need to make sure he’s financially able to support himself and doesn’t need you for financial help. You need to be financially stable as well and don’t need him for financial help. You’re too old to be living like a broke college kid. Grow up.
This is a scam and military can eat for free on base and get a tax free living allowance. He is not military.
Totally nta. Hes scamming you.
Jesus I would have cut him off the first time.
Why are you trying to build a relationship with someone who doesn’t have $10? And if he’s in the military, they’ll feed him.
He’s not military. He is a scammer who is testing the waters.
Block him and quit accepting friend requests from rando fake profiles.
Eww block him NTA
Hell no! Don’t give him any money! Cut communications with him!
NTA! I am always surprised by the amount of scammers that try this tactic! Why do they not research our military first and realize that our military guys are
well fed, three hots & a cot so they’ll stop using this ridiculous line already!?
At least try something believable, you know…try something like…. I need to get my passport and diamonds back from customs or my million dollars and my drivers license that they confiscated from me, if only you could help me get them back my by sending me the money and I’ll give you triple your money back, I swear my sweetest angel loves! /s
sigh and gag!!! 💀
The military feeds their people, either at the chow hall or paying separate rations. I smell a leech?
Sometimes it seems that scammers are hiding behind every tree. Wonder what he’d have done if she’d offered him a few PBJ sandwiches. Knowing someone for 4 days means nothing. OP NTA
Refer him to a soup kitchen. Run…
Scammer! My guess is he is also a widower that has a young child he is trying to raise by himself and if he sends a picture, it is probably of a 4 star General. And he is also a Dr and needs money to get his equipment shipped home and then he can pay you back double what you “loaned” him. You will never actually talk on the phone, only text, can’t do a video call because “it isn’t allowed” and usually they don’t type in complete sentences or use proper English, lots of misspelled words or broken English.
I have had plenty of these message me when I was on dating sites years ago. I would “play” with them. I figured if they were occupied with me it gave them less time to scam others.
Block him!
No. He’s a scammed. Stop talking to him!
The military wont make you rich rich but trust that he isn’t in the military if he is forty and asking for food money. Probably isn’t who you have seen photos of or anything. He’s a scammer.
NTA Red flags all day long on this guy. Steer clear.
Nta…block and run fast, he is in the military and they don’t feed him, he needs a better story, and you need a better man. This is a scammer
I’ve run across these military romance scammers in the past. It starts with a tiny, seemingly reasonable request for a small amount of money. Then there will be more requests, usually with sob stories attached. It continues to escalate until the victim has emptied their bank accounts, savings, retirement fund and whatever other sources of money they have. And the moment the money dries up…The scammer will ghost the victim. I actually live in a 55+ community. Lots of lonely, older women here and at least 2 were in the middle of romance scams when I moved in. I ended up have to do an actual class about romance scammers and other nasty types one finds all over the internet.
I let all the ladies here know that the one defining feature of all scammers is how very quickly they get around to talking about money. If whoever is on the other end of your internet connection asks for ANY amount of money, for any reason at all, (sob stories included), you are dealing with a scammer and need to break off the contact. Blocking them is the preferred option.
This is a common romance scam claiming to be in the military needing money for some dumb ass reason. Refusal to video chat, poor grammar and not knowing basic military rank and saying they need bribe money to leave base and so on.
NTA but as other have move along this guy is 100% a scammer and will ask for more money.
NTA. Your money, your rules. 4 days of texting doesn’t equal a bank loan.
Tell him that if he is really military he gets paid on the 1st and the 15th of each month but this month he got paid last Friday. He needs to budget better.
Since we are talking over for about 4 days give me 100$. I am broke too. Haven’t eaten for a week 🙃
Moving this up so OP for sure sees it. Scam. Block. Scam. For all the reasons already given.
Err… don’t be giving that deadbeat money. This sounds like you are being scammed. Have you met him IRL?
He is scamming you!!!!
I’ve been married for 20 yrs and wouldnt just up and ask my wife to send me $20. That’s shit our kids text us.
Please watch HEY BEAUTIFUL on Hulu and delete anyone asking for money.
This is a scam
He has access to the chow hall
Do not send this person a dime.
Scammer….block him you deserve better….he is bad news 😔
It’s a scam! Don’t send him any money! Block him and move on!
If nothing else, the OP’s age gives lie to the stereotype that it’s only we boomers who get taken in by romance scammers.
NTA. This guy is a love scammer. They do this for a living.
Had one guy ask me to buy him 4 new tires for his truck after one date. The audacity is ridiculous.
He’s a drug user. That is the common amount drug addicts ask for. Run as fast as you can.
As a veteran, I think this guy is not in the military and is a scammer. Why is he bringing you his problems and not keeping it in his unit?
You’re being catfished, hon. Block him.
4 whole days?? You’re basically married. You should just give him the logins for all of your financial accounts. I can’t believe you don’t value the love and trust in each other you’ve both developed in the last 96 hours. Lol. He’s either an emotionally immature fool, or a romance scammer. Either way, in the bin.
Tell him that instead of sitting on his ass talking to you, maybe he should get another job so he can afford to eat.
Block him and move on
NTA This is a SCAM
He should have found a way to fill your tank so you can get to work instead of whining about his bs.
Total scam! Military & money go hand in hand..Nigerian scam artist playbook 101. Block that MF!