AITAH for still going on a July 4th trip when my partner can’t join at the last minute?

r/

I (30F – she/her) moved from Alabama to Louisiana after a divorce and have met the life of my life (30NB – they/them). My best friend in Alabama is house sitting for her parents while they are on vacation. She invited us for a trip to help her keep a close eye on their pool. My partner and I looked at our calendars and decided it was best to go on July 4th weekend since we are both off work for the holiday.

We’ve already talked about all the food we’re going to eat and all the places we will go. And planned a whole pool day with friends. We are both so excited for the trip and to see my best friend again!

I’m a cat person and my partner is a dog person. I have 3 cats and they have one dog. Only a couple of days ago did they go online to book the dog’s boarding while we are away. Now we have discovered that everyone is booked up for the holiday. We are trying different boarding places and trying to find arrangements, but it’s not looking great.

More than likely my partner will not be able to come. Am I the asshole if I go on this trip without them?

Comments

  1. AutoModerator Avatar

    Backup of the post’s body: I (30F – she/her) moved from Alabama to Louisiana after a divorce and have met the life of my life (30NB – they/them). My best friend in Alabama is house sitting for her parents while they are on vacation. She invited us for a trip to help her keep a close eye on their pool. My partner and I looked at our calendars and decided it was best to go on July 4th weekend since we are both off work for the holiday.

    We’ve already talked about all the food we’re going to eat and all the places we will go. And planned a whole pool day with friends. We are both so excited for the trip and to see my best friend again!

    I’m a cat person and my partner is a dog person. I have 3 cats and they have one dog. Only a couple of days ago did they go online to book the dog’s boarding while we are away. Now we have discovered that everyone is booked up for the holiday. We are trying different boarding places and trying to find arrangements, but it’s not looking great.

    More than likely my partner will not be able to come. Am I the asshole if I go on this trip without them?

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  3. AlMtnWoman Avatar

    This is a thin line.
    You’re partners, not spouses, per se.
    Was there any discussion about it? Because honestly if it works for your schedule and you can go, you should go.

  4. Kukka63 Avatar

    Extremely popular holiday and they left booking a kennel this late??? There is nothing wrong with going on your own, have a good trip.

  5. Mannaraps Avatar

    If you want to go. Go. Message them pics and let them know you haven’t forgotten about them but don’t let their poor planning stop you from having a good time.

  6. wonder-winter-89 Avatar

    You haven’t really mentioned or indicated that your partner would be upset if you did go. Would they?

    I don’t think you’d be TA if you went, but I’d be bummed my partner couldn’t make it and not sure that I’d go if that were the case unless the friend had already put in a lot of effort in planning the trip.

  7. After_Yoghurt_1878 Avatar

    I don’t see why both can’t go there cats bro clean the litter box and set out enough food and water they’ll be fine for two days

  8. Weary_Minute1583 Avatar

    NTA (I would still go) but the magic question is… what did your partner say?

  9. Rare_Sugar_7927 Avatar

    NTA go, leaving dog care to the last minute is on them.

  10. Mmoct Avatar

    It was their mistake, you shouldn’t have to pay for it. Although I can’t imagine they will be happy about you having fun while they are home with the dog, even though it’s their fault they will be stuck at home

  11. JohnExcrement Avatar

    You’re not welded together. It’s OK to do things separately sometimes.

  12. BestConfidence1560 Avatar

    No, it would be disappointing in letting your friend down.

    Your partner should understand that they made a mistake, but it doesn’t mean you can’t go