To preface. A couple weeks ago it was my 23F sisters birthday. I had planned for her, after us spending some time with my family, to come to my 26F house. My partner had decorated the house with balloons and a cake for her and had planned a surprise outing in the evening. On our way back to my house, she was carrying with her a glass of water. We were on the underground train platform and it was a very hot day. Anyway, she had jokingly threatened to throw the water at me and I told her multiple times to not throw it. Even though I told her multiple times to not throw it she throw it anyway and I was justifiably upset and angry at her as well as shocked that she had done it even though I protested for her not. I went to sit down on bench at the platform to gather myself while she profusely apologised. I was still upset with her and needed a minute to myself. Instead of giving me that minute she turned to me and said “fine whatever I’m going” and left the train platform to go to another platform. Taking her at her word I thought she had left after her not coming back to the platform caught the train and went home. Initially I thought she was going to meet me back at my place after realising what she did wrong and we could continue her birthday festivities but it had turned out that she, unknowingly to me, remained at the train platform that she was at, and came back to the platform to find me not there. She told me she was distraught and cried on the way back to our family home.
Am I the arsehole for leaving? She said I should’ve tried looking for her but she was the one who did wrong by me. I told her that I didn’t care that it was her birthday that shouldn’t justify her behaving in that way and crossing a boundary I told her multiple times not to. She said that me leaving her was traumatic for her.
Comments
NTA. She ignored your boundary and then walked off. You thought she meant it, so it’s not fair to pin that on you.
NTA. What a load of hogwash on your sister’s part. She threw water at you then acted like a brat because you were justifiably upset and stormed off then came back after not getting the attention from you that she wanted. Adults don’t act like that so of course you thought she actually left. Play stupid games win stupid prizes. Now she got to go home for her birthday because of her childish behavior.
I can’t imagine anyone behaving like that. Were the two of you raised by animals?
nah you’re not the asshole, she crossed your boundary after you asked multiple times and then decided to storm off when you needed space. you didn’t purposely abandon her, you thought she’d gone and would meet you later. it sucks it was her birthday and feelings got hurt, but that doesn’t erase the fact she ignored you and then walked away. she’s making it sound more malicious than it really was
She is acting like a 12-year-old.
She knows how to get on a train.
Why would she expect you to come get her as though you had done something wrong to her?
She said she was leaving and left.
Hopefully this will be an experience she can learn from.
NTA! She’s an adult… she can’t handle the train by herself?
NTA. Birthday or not,she was rude and dismissive of your request to not throw her water on you, and then walk to another platform. She’s old enough to not lack common courtesy for you. She deserved to be distraught after that.
NTA. She fucked around and found out. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Even on your birthday.
She’s 23 and tossing water at you like a 10 year old? Time for you to stop enabling her behavior!
How old are you and your sister?
The way you’ve written this is like a 12 year old.
The whole story is childish.
Both of you need to grow up and act like adults tbh.
NTA She throws water on you and she is playing the victim.
Give us a break.
NTA. She just trying to be the victim. She isn’t traumatized. Your sister is a bitch.
How old is she? 9?
Are you used to coddling her and giving in to her? Her behaviour is so childish it’s a turn off, especially when she’s already in her twenties. Show her this post and let her know that she needs to grow the F up. Ew.
NTA
She’s 23; she can manage using the train herself without you holding her hand. She just wants to blame you for her feeling bad after she was an asshole
NTA
Why the fuck would she think throwing a glass of water over you was acceptable? Pranking is a shitty trend and she damn well knows it. Apologising afterwards doesn’t absolve her, you’d already told her very clearly not to do it.
And she’s a grown adult so if she wanted you to stay with her, she shouldn’t have low-key assaulted you and then run off to somewhere else in the station.