AITAH, I’m Glad She Cheated

I certainly wasn’t at first. It wrecked me. Nearly 7 years as life partners down the drain.

I found out my partner had been having an affair with her boss, so I packed my things up and left one day while she was at work. I spent months wondering why I bothered existing. After giving her a final, emphatic, “No” text message to us ever getting back together, she replied “You’re awful, I hope you get what’s coming to you.”

For some context, we had been living together for 6+ years, moved thrice to different states together, had 3 pets together, and had been through a lot in our lives.

She was the first woman I had lived with after I divorced my (now) ex-wife, who cheated on me with a co-worker, got pregnant, had an abortion, and hid the entire thing from me. Almost everyone is sensitive to cheating, and I figured that given my past, that would be the last thing to happen to me… again. But clearly that meant nothing.

I felt utterly broken. How could this happen to me again? What is so wrong with me that my partner would do this? Depression hit harder than I expected. Those few months after I found out were a hell of a struggle. I was also less than a year removed from losing my last living parent, so that didn’t help. It all felt like it was my fault.

She always needled me and wondered why I hadn’t proposed yet. Gee, I wonder why…

I caught her cheating a few years prior to this (I know, I should have just left her then, but she claimed it was only flirty texts and nothing happened, so I took her word for it), again, with a co-worker.

I didn’t realize the extent of my Stockholm Syndrome. I was angry all the time. I lost the joy in my usual hobbies. I never stopped to think that she was the reason why.

Fast forward a few more months, I reconnected with “the one that got away” and we fell right back into our old ways. It’s been blissful and we are now engaged and getting married in a few months.

My confidence is back. My interactions with strangers are beyond pleasant. I fell back in love with all the things that made me, me. I’m loved by a beautiful woman who cares for me, genuinely. I had no idea life could be this wonderful, or that I’d ever reach this level of happiness. I’m drinking only for pleasure these days, and actually enjoying waking up and getting the day started. I have a new job that I truly love. Life is (almost) suspiciously good. Everything seemed to fall into place after I left her.

I’m glad she cheated, and I don’t feel one ounce of guilt for leaving her the way I did. AITAH?