My husband and I are expecting our first baby this September. We planned a lovely baby shower and live-streamed it for family who couldn’t be there—including my MIL, who lives across the country.
Two days before the shower, she drops the bomb: she’s pregnant with baby #10. She’s in her mid-40s, had claimed they were done having kids, and had even told us they were excited to just be grandparents. But nope—surprise! And somehow, we were expected to match her excitement while 8.5 months pregnant ourselves.
Fast forward to the baby shower. We live-streamed it like we said we would. She joined. I waited for them to log on before opening gifts. And still… she starts rage-texting me DURING my shower. Why? Because I didn’t stop everything to personally call each family member, and because I didn’t open the car seat and stroller she gifted us (which had already been assembled at home). Apparently, it was meant to be a big moment. She said I wasn’t being “intentional enough.”
Honestly, it felt like the gift was more about her than our baby. I wanted to include everyone, but I also wanted to enjoy my day without fielding a tantrum.
To top it off… now I get to explain to people that my baby’s aunt or uncle is younger than him. So… AITA for being annoyed about her timing, the drama at my baby shower, and feeling like her gift was a power move?
Comments
She’s absolutely being a diva but your irritation at her reproductive choices is strictly a you problem.
NTA. She sounds pretty self centered and exhausting. As for the aunt/uncle thing. that isn’t as big a deal as you might worry. My dad’s sister is about a year younger than me, and we were for all intents cousins. As adults we’re even in the same friend groups.
NTA, she’s trying to make this about herself. Sounds like she really likes attention on her, 10th baby at 40 is wild
My dad restarted a family with my stepmom in his late 40’s. My brother and his wife had a baby a couple months before my baby brother was born. So I understand the weirdness lol.
But the fact she made YOUR shower about HER is insane. And no adult should be throwing a tantrum over something so small. If you hurt her feelings she should have been able to stay clam and talk about it without hurting you.
My moms mom had a ton of kids. I have a aunt my age and an uncle younger than me. Its pretty cool. Outside that NTA she is totally taking the spot light. The gift thing is rediculous and she’s doing too much.
NTA. You know she got pregnant to pull attention back to her.
ESH
She sucks for making your baby shower about her. She also sucks for harassing you during the baby shower. Totally uncool.
You suck for making her reproductive choices about you.
“now I get to explain to people that my baby’s aunt or uncle is younger than him.” You are seriously yuck here, please stop this asap. Totally uncool.
Be annoyed hy the drama rage texts. The rest is just bs.
Updateme
Js, your kid isn’t the first to have an aunt or uncle younger than them. It’s actually fairly normal. Source: i come from a big Hispanic family.
My uncle is younger than my 2 oldest siblings. It isn’t as uncommon as you think. Especially in the Catholic community in the last century. This is something you don’t have to worry about.
NTA. MIL is one, though.
Nta. Her 10th pregnancy?! She needs to learn how to close her legs! 🤣
NTA My dad was the 11th of 14. I’ve got cousins that are his age. My grandfather was married twice (first died). Most of the kids are from my grandma. Strangely enough despite being a twin she never had twins.
Was with you until the end.
You’re worried about telling your unborn baby about her aunts and uncles? Please.
MIL is an ass, but what do you really care about her choice to have another child?
I get your fury about most of this but no, you can’t be annoyed that she’s pregnant.
She lives across the country the easiest way to deal with her when she has a tantrum is to hang up and/or block her.
I have a niece that’s 6 months younger than me it’s really not that hard to explain. You’re nta for the first part but that ending made you an AH
how is your husband handling his mother? that’s really the only question that matters.
My Grand niece is two years older than my son.
It does not matter if she lives in a different state than we do.
My son is going to be twenty nine years old come Christmas.
Insert “hot down a hallway” joke here
Nta