Am I (20F) Overreacting to Continuous Rude Behavior?

I (20F) have been dating my boyfriend, soon to be fiancé sometime this October/November, for two years. He’s met my family and they have a great relationship. Him and my Dad get along great since they have common interests and such. Even my Pappy (Dad’s Dad) has said he’s another grandson to him. I’ve also met my bf’s family and it’s not at all the same case in terms of my relationship with his family in comparison.

A lot has been said at this point with them. For example, I’ve been called controlling and codependent to my face, I’ve been told that I need to call them so they can “get to know me” after I already expressed that I don’t enjoy phone calls, being accused of ignoring them, and having false accusations made that I faked being sick to not be around them (I had mono and food poisoning back to back). My bf and I both have tried setting boundaries and have been open about what we haven’t appreciated about their behavior but at this point it seems pointless.

Would I be overreacting by letting go of the relationship with his family (mostly just the parents but they’ve gotten some of his three sisters to side with them)? At this point there has been plenty of opportunities for them to take ownership of their part in the situation—at minimum—and also enough opportunities to try and build back positive rapport but they haven’t. I’m not interested in having a fake relationship with people who obviously don’t care about me, but so many people have said that I should just call like they want and get over it, but that would be giving them exactly what they want without them acknowledging any of the hurt they’ve caused. I know I haven’t been perfect, I’ve been snippy at times, and in the beginning I definitely could have tried to call, but it never felt natural to. This has been going on for about 8 months now, on and off.

I’m at my wits end and don’t know what else to do except for giving up on the relationship and letting bf handle any communication with them (but they are also unhappy about how little he calls them and sees them despite living 3 hrs away knowing he’s working two jobs, going to school, and hopefully flying—so that adds a layer of complexity).

Am I being dramatic or am I being relatively reasonable? I love my partner deeply, and want to continue building a life with him, but his family is the only thing dampening that.