i am 19 M met this girl at 17 in school and we have been together since then. we have broken up a couple times during our first stages of talking because she was gay and had a thing with another girl. but eventually that went out and when it did that’s when we were able to actually date. and from the begging of our time she always just wanted me and i understand that’s an amazing thing to have a girl who only want you and always wants you. but it was all the time. i wasn’t able to relax wit my family when i wanted to because she wanted me there. i used to go out a lot with my friends party drink like a regular teen nothing crazy but that was me a very social person. and she was the exact opposite hated parties hated making new friends wouldn’t even go out ever. and when we started dating she expected that from me. i didn’t think it would be to the extent that it is now. but for the whole relationship i have gone out with my friends a number of times that i can count. which is horrible my friends are always out doing things i always loved to do. but she would never allow me to because she didn’t want me to if i even mentioned going out to something small she would get mad id usually always stay but then when times i do go. she starts blowing up my phone crying telling me why im leaving her alone that i shouldn’t be leaving her alone. oh yeah and she always and i mean every night needs me to be there for her to sleep be on the phone to talk to her to sleep she says that’s the only way she can sleep. and for almost 3 years. yes it has gotten more than annoying frustrating even. but i still stand with it. because there is still something in me that doesn’t wanna loose her. And yeah that’s not even the start. she always wants me to be at her house her work she works at fun i and for 2 years monday wensday i would be at her work and then from the beginning of the relationship she made friday and every single friday “our day” so i can’t even do anything on fridays doesn’t matter what it is. there were times that it was a family even that even i invited her to. and she was still mad about that saying “it’s supposed to be our day” and shit like that. no matter what i do no matter what i say there can always be a problem no matter what. i’m not a problematic person i have respect and i know how to respect. but with her it’s almost impossible. when there’s always a problem where i turn out to ALWAYS be the bad guy i fucking go insane. even when she doesn’t something wrong and i wanna get reassurance or maybe even talked to nicely she can flip iit completely and make me the bad guy. even when i wanted to talk about how i feel. when she talks about how she feels there always has to be something about me and she has to always add extra shit jus to be disrespectful to me. and she expects me to go on my knees and beg for forgiveness or whatever the case is. but she’s disrespecting me. i’m sorry but with how much she has done this type of shit. yes i can’t fucking reassure her right i can’t tell her everything’s okay when im the one getting told off at even if it isn’t my fault getting shit told at me. it’s almost impossible. and yes i eventually do begin to get mad and i guess”raise my voice” or like she says scream but half of the time im talking im not screaming sometimes yes i do raise my voice when its constant back and forth but its everytime and again if it was something i wanted to talk about it would get flipped in ways like that. i cant even be me around her getting scared or nervous that something can happen. she says i dont love her i dont make her feel heard listened or cared about. but i try my hardest but even when i do think im doing good im makin sure she feels good she can throw it out the window and tell me im not doing shit. i don’t know or understand what to do. i’m always the bad guy. yes i do make mistakes i do give attitude and be sassy when things “don’t go my way” but it’s not that i try to make it go my way. i just can’t get a hold of anything to make her feel okay because she never can. she’s a girl who changed me completely and i can’t even leave her because of everything we have had together. but i lost all sense of myself. me as a person i don’t even know who i am anymore. being with her i just feel trapped. after i see her i have to call her on my 30 minute drive home when im home i have to call her when im at the gym have to call her. when im out with my friends which is as rare as finding a fucking diamond on the floor. she didn’t even let me go to a st pattys parade with my friends because “she didn’t feel comfortable me going where there’s allot of people and people drinking” im a fucking guy all that worrying is just bullshit because she doesn’t want me to go period. that’s it. in a guy who can more than definently take care of myself. but she doesn’t care. i don’t have a life anymore. my life is all about her at age 19. and this isn’t how i want my life to be. at all. her love is real her thought is real. but eveurbting else it’s like i’m destroying myself just being with her. and she tells me that exact same thing that stay in with me is destroying her. but all im doing is buying her the things she wants being with her everytime she wants giving her my time 24/7. shit she gets mad when i’m fucking chilling with my little brother who’s fucking 8 like i genuinely don’t know what to do. i wish i can explain absolutely everything about this but obviously that’d just be to much. i know this makes it look like she’s just the bad one and i don’t have any bads but i do. but they are never for nothing they are never just because i want to. yes i make mistakes and i own up to them but still no matter what i try to do i will forever be the bad guy.