I’m not sure I (37m) with (32f) qualify my relationship as dead bedroom, but sex has become a once every two or three weeks situation lately, therefore feeling like I’m headed towards a dead bedroom and being led to believe that’s not the case.
Here’s the progression over the last 9 months:
Month 1-3: sex three or four times a week on average (every time we saw each other)
Month 4-6: sex 2 times a week and wouldn’t happen every single time. Sometimes we would spend all day doing activities so truly exhausted.
Month 7&8: Usually once a week
Month 9: happens every couple of weeks, but feels like I’m having to almost beg.
To give more context, around the 5 or 6 month mark, there was a lot going on in her life with family and I know it’s been stressful. Finances have also been something that she seems to be stressed about which she openly shares with me that is a big stressor of hers.
Overall, the slowdown in sex has accompanied what appear to be outside factors. Our relationship is really strong and stable otherwise I feel, but the going multiple weeks where she has little desire or shows little desire for me is concerning and often feels like I’m no longer appealing or wanted in that way.
We have talked deeply on the topic a few times as I’ve shared my concerns. She’s very adamant that she’s very attracted to me and that’s it’s each of the factors I’ve listed above that’s led to her level of wanting to have sex.
I will add that we went on a cruise a month ago, and while on the cruise we were doing it at least 2 times a day for a week straight. If anything this leads me to believe that if no stressors were present, she’s willing to be readily available sexually.
TLDR, Looking for feedback or advice as I don’t want to end up months or years down the road with someone that never wants to be intimate. Should I be concerned? Or is this a phase?