For 2 1/2 years I have been on and off with my toddlers dad.
I asked him to move in .
He said he was going to buy a house. Claimed it was for me and the toddler. I have a house.
I asked him not to do it. He went through with it.
After three weeks of being angry about it. We finally had a good couple of days we are we discussed if it works out well between us, he would then sell it.
But then last night he kept referring to his house as his house – I am picking out colors for his room that he would like.
Am I the a whole for not believing him?
That he has never actually going to move in. And he is just playing games again.
Comments
One of my favorites phrases is “if he wanted to, he would”
If he wants to work things out with you, he wouldn’t have bought a house without you. He’s setting himself up for the long haul. Don’t be making it any easier on him by making his house a home for him. Let him go. He knows he can trail you along and will do so for as long as you aalow him.
It does seem strange that he would buy a house. If it was for you he would have included you in the decision.
This does not sound promising. I wouldn’t count on him moving in with you.
Seems like you have options.
Check the values of the two properties. Pick one to live in that works best for you guys. Whoever sells their property buys an actual stake in the other property so neither of you are worried about getting kicked out.
But the house that his good ole male ego has (at least at one point) convinced him he needs for you and the toddler for the future that he’s proud of himself for getting himself and convinced himself so thoroughly was a good idea he didn’t listen to you tell him no? At least consider that as a possible one, or make him think you are. Just realize why he might have attachment to it (even though you asked him not to do this in the first place).
Hun you are reading it exactly as you see it. He is NOT your partner in this. Protect yourself and do NOT give up your house!!!
It makes me nervous that there’s a possibility he will convince you to move in to “his house” (that’s in his name only) and sell your house, without any conversation of putting you on the deed.
If you have been on and off for 2 1/2 years… Then this is not a good relationship. You are never going to find a good relationship while your focus is still on this. Move on and find someone deserving of you.