This is where I most felt comfortble asking so I apologize if it is wrong sub for this.
I am a personal shopper at work. I was looking for an item and another companies vendor asked me what I was looking for. It said it was where I was but I didn’t find it there. He then proceeded to get close to me and put the back of his hand on my breast while pointing towards somewhere???
Which I never found where he said it was there was NOTHING there. But it just made me so uncomfortable.
- Why did he need to be that close?
- Why did he leave his hand there for several seconds?
Like on accident is FINE but he was literally right next to me. That felt very deliberate. Like I have accidentally hit my coworkers breasts, ass, etc bc we are in a hallway and vice versa. We always apologize and pull away. He did this in an open area and did not say a word.
My manager took me seriously when I said what happened, but I feel like I am overreacting. I have been sexually abused before and maybe I just don’t see it right because of that. He has always been nice. It just made me so uncomfortable and I can’t wrap my head around it
Comments
You are not wrong, people do shit like this until they get called out on it
You are never wrong for reporting things like this.
No one needs to be that close to someone to be able to point to where an item is located.
I work in customer service and people regularly ask me to show them where things are. Some even bring out their cell phone to show me. I have never once accidentally touched someone’s chest while guiding them. This individual knew what they were doing and I suspect they have been getting away with it for a while. Think of it this way: you didnt report it for you, you reported it for the potential next person. Inappropriate behavior should always be checked. Accident or not
Men are hyper aware of women and our “special” parts. He knew exactly what he was doing.
Not wrong at all, there’s no need to touch anyone in any capacity while you are pointing them somewhere.
Several seconds?! That can’t be an accident. Extra extra weird they pointed to nothing?! Sorry that happened to you. Doesn’t seem like an overreaction
Not overreacting at all. I’m really glad they’re taking you seriously
Definitely, he knew what he was doing. just touching you, as it is really not needed is already a fault. You did the right thing to report him.
Seems like a real vibe question that ultimately you have to decide. I’m having trouble imagining from your description how he wasn’t able to avoid touching your breast but I don’t know if I’m imaging it right so it’s also hard to say “yes definitely report”.
If it felt deliberate to you then I’d say report it. You get to decide whether to report it as “this guy definitely acted creepy” or “I felt like this guy might have been acting creepy” or some other variation that fits how it felt to you.
This kind of thing happened to me when I was younger at work. I worked next to a guy making food, and his elbow would ALWAYS end up in my tit until I talked with a supervisor. The guy himself didn’t care what I said.
“Why did he need to be that close?
Why did he leave his hand there for several seconds”
Because he wanted to touch your breast but if you said anything claim it was an accident.
Girl, if it feels wrong, you gotta do something about it
He got that close to start with so the touching would seem more incidental. Very creepy behaviour.
Not over reacting, if it was an accident they would have apologised straight away because it’s embarrassing to be the person to accidentally touch your coworker, doubly so if it’s somewhere like the breast or backside.
Unless there are some cultural differences or exigent circumstances, it is inappropriate and your reaction is fully justified.
Gross. I am glad you said something or he would probably keep doing things like this. Good on your manager, too. That’s says a lot though for them to immediately believe. They trust you and they know that dude is a legit creeper.
Throw the whole fucking library at the creep.
No. You would be wrong to NOT to report it. If it was an accident nothing will happen.
Unfortunately if it wasn’t an accident, there’s a good chance nothing will happen unless several people report it. You helped everyone by reporting. (Well, except the person who did it, and the person who should have done something about it before now.)
He knew exactly what he was doing. I’m glad you reported this creep, op! I’m sorry you went through this 🙁
Nah you saw it right. SA makes us hyper aware. If it feels wrong it is.
I’m proud of you. It wasn’t a mistake. It was deliberate. And the idea that women’s bodies are there to be used needs to go away.
Put it this way, even if he did it without knowing it was inappropriate, he needs to learn that what he did was inappropriate and made you uncomfortable. This is a learning opportunity for him.