Me and my bf have been saying for less than a month now but have been talking since january. Early on i would notice him messaging this other girl alot. Since we werent dating i didnt mention it but now tht we are it did start to bother me. Last night i reaches a point where i couldnt hold it back anymore and i told him how it made me insecure. I started the conversation like “ i feel insecure abt ___, from my perspective shes just a girl thts messaging and calling my bf alot so maybe if u tell me more abt her than itll help me feel secure” he said they met in 2023 while working and then she got a job in a dif state. I asked him if they ever dated and he said no and if hes told her abt me and he said no at first then clarified that he refers to me as “my girl” when texting her. I asked how often they text and he says every other day, i also asked if he texts her good morning/goodnight and he said at the beginning of messages just for formalities.
I have no reason not to trust him, i just cant help but think they text more than every other day and it really bothers me that they call each other. Am i being too insecure abt this, should i let it go or have another conversation with him? And wht should i ask to make me feel secure?
TLDR: it makes me insecure how often my bf communicated with another girl (texts n calls” am i just being insecure or is it a little weird)
Comments
If he’s known her this long without making a move, it is likely it’s just platonic and she’s only a friend.
You have to give him the real benefit of the doubt unless he’s given you a reason not to, which he hasn’t really.
tbh we women just have a feeling when it’s more than it is and it seems from the post that you do have a feeling about this. I honestly would wait it out and see, cut him some slack and then eventually anything suspicious would come out in light. Pretend you don’t care anymore but keep observing. Look at their discussions if you need to but don’t get caught. Or ask to see something on his phone(for example yours is charging and you need to see something on tiktok) and if he acts weird about it then you knowq