Using a throwaway account for pretty obvious reasons but, as the title said, I’m so anxious about buying adult toys that it’s literally preventing me from doing so. I know this doesn’t make a whole lot of sense, but I, 19f, just can’t bring myself to do it and I need advice on the best solution. My sex drive is very high, I’m in a relationship but obviously there are times my partner isn’t in the mood/available and honestly sometimes I just want to get things done myself iykwim. However, I don’t have the option of ordering anything because I did that once from a place with discreet packaging, and you could still clearly tell what was in it. I live with my family and they always open my packages anyways, so that’s off the table. I’m heavily considering going into an adult store, but I look very young for my age (I always get mistaken for 14-15) and I’m worried they would try to kick me out/give me a weird reaction and question me about it. I also have very low self esteem and I feel like because I’m a very unattractive person, whoever is in the store would either see me as a pathetic loser who needs to buy things to get off alone because they can’t get anyone else to touch them, or they would feel grossed out knowing someone of my standing has sexual thoughts. I’ve also thought about asking my partner to buy them for me, (he’s gone into the adult store multiple times) but I feel to embarrassed to ask because I have a lot of anxiety surrounding sex due to my low self esteem and me being physically unattractive. I know how insane this all sounds but I just can’t get it out of my mind and it feels like I have no options, so I need advice or someone to simply knock some sense into me honestly.
Anxious about buying adult toys
r/Advice
Comments
Wont lie i used to feel this way too, however i went to a sex store near my campus and had called beforehand. They were really chill like probably chillest people j met 😭 they were both high and had a chill convo with them (not about toys). Realistically people working in a sex shop know the reason people are shopping there and they obviously work there for a reason and its because they dont shame nor hate someone for walking to the store. Just walk in find what you want and checkout they shouldnt judge you at all dont worry if anything call beforehand and get a feel on their customer service
Hey op. I think you are sort of overthinking it and that’s coming from someone who had similar thoughts about sex stores.
I’ve been to so many now, and everyone is always so helpful and kind!
One time an employee opened like five vibrators for me to feel the speed with my hand until I found one I liked. They usually are super nonjudgmental! I think you’ll be fine. This is also coming from someone who people think is still in high school, I’m in my late 20s.
Get that sex toy! But if you truly aren’t comfortable just go in the store with your partner and look with them. That’s fun too
Sex is a natural thing and nothing to be ashamed of. Lots of single people and married/couples use them! It’s not as nerve wracking as you think it will be. The people that usually run “sex shops” have seen it all and do not judge. Go get ALL the things that interest you. Go get em!
42/m married.
Order from Amazon and have it shipped to a locker, a friend, work, or get a PO Box or use one of those mailbox services that are in strip malls. Your family shouldn’t be opening your mail. Get their box and that will solve things in many ways regarding your personal business.