Hi! I want to start by saying that I need as much advice as possible that you might find useful. I am a 16 year old teenager from Romania. I argue with my parents almost every day, it’s a nightmare. It all started with nicotine addiction, at first when I was vaping they didn’t catch me but after they caught me a few times it got worse, the story doesn’t end here last year I had an important high school exam I passed but not with the best results, besides that that year I tried za/yart for the first time with a friend and because it was the first time they caught me. What’s the idea at the moment they behaved very badly, they didn’t want to let me leave the house, punished me with any gadget without money I couldn’t do anything plus they argued with me every day it was a nightmare. After a while things slowly started to improve, but since that year I have had nasty arguments with them every day for anything, they scold me every time even though they often don’t do anything wrong, for example today when I decided to ask for your help they scolded me because the parents of the friend I tried to date for the first time called the organizers of a camp to tell them to be careful with the two of us because we were doing “bad things” together. My mother somehow found out and started yelling at me again and threatening me that if I do anything there she will come and take me out of that city and punish me etc…
The idea is that since I tried yart/za I quit smoking and that was the last time I did anything like that including normal cigarettes now I only use snus/nicotine pouches but they found out about those too and it was really bad. Ok the idea is that since then every day they remind me of my failures and scold me and humiliate me they make me feel really bad many times they punish me for no reason like in the example above, even though I say I corrected myself this year for example I had almost the highest average in the class which is very close to the maximum grade. I tried everything to be honest, it didn’t work it just made everything worse every time I confessed more fights and punishments followed. Since last year since I made those mistakes and went through those experiences it’s like everything is a never-ending hell every day they scold me for everything they punish me they tell me I’m going to be a loser that I have no chance in life it’s so unbearable because this hell repeats itself every day, despite the fact that I tried to change and I mostly succeeded and I don’t really create problems. I can’t complain about offering they offer me everything I need for example I have an iphone 16 PM. But that’s only in material things otherwise I don’t know what to do to stop this once I’ve tried everything I know best. If anyone thinks they can help me with any advice I would be very grateful! (Sorry for the spelling mistakes I’ve never written anything like this before)
Any help si much apreciated(my personal hell)
r/Advice
Comments
They’re fighting your past not your present protect your peace and outgrow the chaos quietly
Their method is flawed but they are right that nicotine is horrible for you.
You’re not overreacting
You’ve taken steps to change, but your parents keep bringing up the past and using shame instead of support. That’s not fair, and it’s not how growth should be met.
Advice: Write everything down both what happens and how you feel (kind of like a journal 📝). It can help you stay grounded and give you something to share if you talk to a counselor or trusted adult.