Lately I’ve been noticing how many women (myself included at one point) are living life on autopilot.
You wake up, go through the routine, say yes to everything, and just keep pushing… but inside, you’re tired. Not just physically tired but soul tired.
You’ve done what you’re “supposed” to do. You show up. You handle it all.
But deep down, you know something is missing… peace, purpose, you.
I used to be the person who couldn’t say no, who never had a second to breathe, and who always told herself “I’ll figure it out later.”
Eventually, I had to ask myself: Is this how I really want to live?
If this resonates at all, I’d genuinely love to hear from you.
What helps you reconnect when you feel disconnected from yourself?
Comments
Yeah. It’s definitely mental health stuff going on.
2024 was an absolute dumpster fire. PTSD evaluation has been mentioned for multiple people I know, and I know I’m have a worse time with depression and anxiety.
Yes, yes, resounding yes. I’m so tired that I’ve resorted to listening to an old radio and playing solitary card games to just zone out completely. Yes I’d love to paint or garden or go to the gym but I’m fucking bone weary.
Yes, but I also have learned that I am the only one who can yank myself out of stagnant thinking.
It’s completely ok to lean into it for a little bit though, don’t get me wrong. I made a habit of sitting in it for too long and ended up with clinical depression for about a year. The world is absolutely nuts these days and I feel exhausted even reading the news despite feeling a moral obligation to keep myself informed and aware.
I liken the sensation to walking through mud. You’d like to take off running, you’d like to feel alive, but whenever you try, the feeling that you are being dragged down just gets stronger.
I use exercise as a physical way for me to get out of that headspace. I also vault heavily into a new hobby, I use quite a few instagram DIY accounts to inspire me while also making my starting point “i might suck at this, but ill try it anyways”. Recently I learned how to do a blanket stitch and now i’m suddenly interested in embroidery and making things out of felt. Zoning into something without the distraction of your own rumination, your phone, the news, the mindless droning of netflix I have found has been really helpful. Gardening is also a new an facinating hobby for me. I get excited to see my plants and how they’ve grown, I like problem solving pests and identifying disease/fungus on plant leaves.
I think much of this feeling has to do with a loss of identity. Feeling like you are just an indistinguishable meat bag doing your expected daily duties. The only way i’ve chased that feeling away is by giving my brain better things to think about and my body better fuel to work with.
Fucking struggling over here. I’m so fucking tired
Picking up a hobby I love really helped. Funnily, I’m actually pretty bad at pottery, but I do genuinely enjoy it even though I fuck up a lot. I think there’s also something to be said for just making something concrete with your hands, especially if (like me) you work at a desk job and mostly spin bullshit. Quite a few of my friends have green thumbs and have really come to enjoy puttering around in their gardens, which I envy as I do not share their knack.
I’m also very much a city girly, but I like getting out in nature once in a while – going on a beautiful hike or even cool trail if you just have an afternoon to spare. If you get bored easily, you can throw in some bird-watching or geocaching or whatever to make things a little more interesting.
I think that a lot of modern people feel psychologically alienated because we’re so alienated from the physical world around us, so yeah – getting some dirt (or, rather, clay) under your fingernails can be surprisingly soul-feeding!
As someone who was living with a partner and is now living alone, I’ve found myself wondering if life has felt more or less monotonous. There were so many times with my ex that I wished we did more things and now I have the freedom to do whatever I want (I did then, too, but I’d stay home a lot more because I wanted to spend time with him). In this aspect, life was more monotonous with him. But then I think about how living with a partner or friend adds another variable to your day- my day may always be the same, but maybe something different happens in theirs and they share it with me. That would make being alone feel more monotonous. This is kind of a tangent, but I think the feeling of monotony has had me feeling that “Is this it?” notion.
Aside from that, with the economy and my job, I’ve kind of given up on saving a lot of money for retirement. I told myself I’d travel a lot this year while I’m still young and worry less about saving… BUT then I find myself always stressing about money in the back of my head.
I don’t know if I’m making sense at all but these 2 feelings/thoughts have been circulating in my mind lately and it makes me feel like I’m in a hamster wheel.
What’s helped me the most is being okay with downtime and not letting myself feel “lazy” for binge watching a show a few nights a week. And also trying new things. Novel experiences promote brain elasticity and make life feel less mundane. It’s scary at first, especially when I’m doing a lot of these things alone, but I’m hopeful it’s doing more good for me in the long run. It also makes me feel proud of myself which is cool lol
Yep. I get up at 4:00 to go to the gym. I want to shut my alarm off so badly every day, and sometimes I do. I cry on the way to the gym. I get home and deal with my kids arguing and making requests as we all get ready for our days. I drive to work and receive texts from them as the argue about how they want to get to school or something else.
I work all day. I usually cry on the way home. Evenings are filled with softball games or other activities where I feel like an outsider among the other parents who are all there with their spouses and I’m the single mom. I go to bed at 8:00. On the weekends I go to the gym and play piano at church. Then I meal prep for the week and start again.
I’m not sure what the purpose of all of this is sometimes. I really do appreciate that I’ve got a great career and hobbies that keep me and my kids busy. I love my kids and I appreciate that they are generally happy and healthy. It just feels so monotonous sometimes.
I feel this in my soul.
I feel like I am an observer in my life and not participating sometimes.
It’s hard to manage all the things I’m stressed so it’s making it harder to lose weight which has me concerned with strength training and calorie cutting.