Anyone else feel more insecure about having a sex with a new partner for the first time in their 30s than in their 20s? How do you cope with insecurity when society expects confidence?

r/

I am recently separated and have been dating but avoiding any intimacy (despite wanting it) because I feel so insecure. I also feel more pressure to be confident and in touch with my body because I’m older (in general – I’m dating people my age) but I feel so afraid. I know I cant be the only one so I’m posting for advice here.

Comments

  1. marymoon77 Avatar

    What are you afraid of? Like what part of it?

  2. lucent78 Avatar

    I’m not sure exactly what you are insecure about but when getting my groove back after a couple years I was feeling insecure about some weight gain and simply was vulnerable with the guy about this. He reassured me and all was good. Not every person is safe to be vulnerable with but if your gut tells you he/she is then I recommend given vulnerability a try. Typically people will meet you there.

  3. intheweave Avatar

    Just got out of a long relationship at 32 and I feel exactly the same way. No answers. Just letting you know you’re not alone!

  4. Artywoman58 Avatar

    Try doing it in your 60s after 18 years of celibacy! But seriously, it’s natural to feel insecure. Just take it slowly and you’ll be right. It’s like riding a bike!