Are these kinds of interactions considered “approaches” or signals of interest?

r/

I’m a 36-year-old guy, recently single, and I’m trying to get better at understanding social cues — especially in nightlife settings. I don’t usually initiate much due to a bit of social anxiety, so I often rely on signals from others before making a move. Lately, though, I’ve had a few interactions that left me wondering if women were expressing genuine interest, or if this kind of thing is more common than I thought and I’m just overthinking it.

These all happened on separate nights out recently:

A woman I found very attractive sent her friend over to talk to me, then came over herself, asked me to dance, and we exchanged numbers. We texted a bit after but it fizzled out.

At a club, two women made prolonged eye contact with me. I tried talking to them later, they weren’t very receptive — but then their friend motioned to me asking if I liked one of them. I shook my head, and those same two later danced near me, lightly bumping into me multiple times.

At a bar, I caught repeated glances from two women in a group of four — multiple times throughout the night. I didn’t act on it, but I’ve noticed that kind of glancing happens to me fairly often.

Another time, I was sitting alone in a booth and a woman sat down across from me. Her friends said, “Look after her,” and left. I invited her to sit closer, she did, touched my arm a few times while we talked, but politely declined when I asked for her number at the end of the night.

I’ve also noticed that some women will subtly get closer on the dance floor without engaging directly.

I’m not trying to humblebrag — I’m genuinely unsure how to read this kind of behavior. Are these kinds of interactions how women show interest, or are they just normal things people do when they’re out and socializing?

Any honest feedback or perspectives would really help. Especially curious how women over 30 interpret this kind of behavior, or how they themselves would show subtle interest.

Comments

  1. kevolad Avatar

    Ok, similar situation but I’ve been suffering longer lol. So what I’ve learned is that no attention from women isn’t thought through especially if they’re with their friends. It might be “omg, I want him” or “aw, he looks so sweet, I’m melting” or “this guy looks like he needs a friend” to even “I’m gonna tease this dude to make myself feel better from dragging him along” and everything between and beyond
    Bitches be crazy
    I’ll give you what I am learning and struggling with and that is you just gotta swing for it. Strike or a homerun, gotta swing the bat. One thing for sure, these girls aren’t ignoring you

  2. But_like_whytho Avatar

    I would recommend being direct. You can’t say the wrong thing to the right person. If you see a woman who you think might be interested in you and you want to know for sure, simply ask her. If she’s not actually interested, she’ll tell you.

  3. JanetInSpain Avatar

    Sometimes they might be genuinely checking you out, but women also have their “Am I safe” radar up 99% of the time when out, especially when in a bar. That’s not the best place to meet a potential partner or date. That’s probably the worst place.

    Find some local Meetups/clubs that are about something that you like: walking group, gardening, cooking, rock hounding, climbing, whatever. Or take local extension classes in topics that interests you. You’ll have a much better chance of meeting someone with something in common because you’re already all doing the same thing.