If you mean cold approached, 0
99,999% of women don’t cold approach, no matter how attractive the man.
If your talking about women making the first move, it’s not zero, but the actual number really depends on what you mean by that. Most of the time if a woman is interested she will signal that, but generally she won’t fully verbalise before you do, so if you mean she verbalises interest first the number is also really low.
Yeah pretty much never. Even in my prime when I was really good looking it was mostly nonexistent. Women did stare a lot and do some of their subtle little hints hoping I would pick up on them but a straight approach, I can only remember maybe three off the top of my head.
I barely went out for years as i thought i was unattractive as guy bullied me so much growing up and women seemed to almost entirely ignore me
i might be very handsome now
in about 12 outings at age 32 to bar, i got approached my at least 2 girls i wouldnt consider at all, going for a guy well out of their league.. and 2 quite decent 18 year olds… i didnt really know what to say though and they though i was rejecting them and went away probably crying
I consider myself at least slightly above average, and if being given complement is considered approached, then its happened a few times within the last year.
As far as a woman straight up saying ” hey xyz, i want your number” or some other variant, nope…never lol
Happens to me like twice a week nowadays. Not sure what is happening but it’s crazy. I’m just some dude. Earlier this week I was on a boat with my wife and my wife got up to take pictures for a moment. And the girl in front of me gave me a piece of paper with her phone number… stuff like that.
This is a tough question to answer. Ever since I started lifting heavy at the gym and my body went from skinnyfat to toned/muscular, I get attentions from women, approached? Rarely. But this is the greatest story that I have:
It was Halloween season, I was in one of those Halloween costume stores, waiting in line for the dressing room. This very pretty woman walks by, she punches me twice (gently) on the shoulder and says “You know you are very good looking, right?” and walked away. I was flabbergasted!
She was a customer, and later on I saw her in the store, I approached her and we started to talk, she had a crop top showing a nice large tattoo on her lower back. [LOL, I know]
We left together, went to a bar, had a couple of drinks, then went to her place and fucked like horny rabbits.
So, there’s that.
That was not my life before I started lifting hard at the gym, and while I was crippled with depression and anxiety.
I’ve been cold approached once. A bit under half of the women I’ve been with made the first move though. I probably only figured out how to date thanks to that sort of thing happening to be honest
It’s a fucking nightmare.. I can’t even walk down the street without having gorgeous women throwing themselves at me.. all the neighbours wives look at me like Im a piece of prime steak and local ladies brass band, – well let’s just say Im getting bored of how they change thier flute blowing techniques and stare at me every time I walk by.. it’s like fucking band camp all over again..
It happens occasionally. I almost said it happened more when I was younger, but now that I’m thinking about it, it still happens. The context is just different.
Random women might strike up conversations with me, and I tend to be pretty oblivious, so I’ll just kind of awkwardly make small talk and then wander away. And then later, someone would be like “Dude, that girl was totally hitting on you.” And I’m like “Really? I didn’t get that impression.”
Women are gonna be too intimidated (and get butterflies) to directly approach guys they really find sexually attractive the vast majority of time, and if one does in that once and a blue moon, you probably won’t find her attractive anyway.
Women don’t usually approach the same way that men do.
I can’t say it doesnt happen, it’s happened many times to me, but it’s few and far between.
Instead of approaching, women will “find” themselves in your space, and then will find a way to join in your conversation.
Like last week I was buying a vape from the store and when I asked the cashier for a certain flavor, the girl behind me asked if that flavor was any good and what flavors I’d suggest. We talked for a bit and ended up exchanging numbers.
She didn’t approach me and hit on me and ask for my number the way you’d think of when a dude approaches a girl. She instead found a way to strike up conversation with me, and let me lead the rest of the way.
I’m above average looking, it happens here and there. If I approach tho I’m rarely turned down.
I have a friend that looks like a damn GQ model tho and he gets handed at least 5 numbers a day, it’s wild, we can just be walking through somewhere and women will just walk by and hand him their numbers and keep walking. 99% of the time he just throws them away lol
It’s funny to hear guys not being cold approached.
My 5′ 7″ Tom Cruise style friend got approached all of the time. Within minutes of entering a room.
At 50, I’m nothing special… but I can tell when women my age are giving me extra attention. She might not approach me but you can tell that our interaction is going well.
Rarely and never direct. But my conversion rate was very high.
Spotlight on tinder and hinge etc being the exception
But usually just looking or brushing into you. Then half the time you talk to them and can’t tell. Then a week later their girlfriend goes “my friend was really into you, why did you walk away”…. Because I was trying hard and she was giving me nothing back
I am Gen X and as a teenager it was pretty constant, once I hit my 20’s that kind of attention evaporated. I have not been directly propositioned by a women I didn’t already break the ice with since I was like 17.
That said I got married in December last year and since then I have had a bunch of women chatting me up in supermarkets and out in public.
Gay dudes have been far more interested in me throughout my life than straight women.
Never. I’ve had women I’ve already known confess their feelings for me, but it was still my responsibility to talk to them first, ask them out, do the work to maintain the relationship, etc.
I’ve never been asked out and have never been flirted with except by friends who were comfortable enough around me to joke/ “play flirt.” Or if I have it’s never been in a form I can recognize. Honestly it gets old, even when you’re told you’re attractive you don’t feel like you’re ever really wanted.
If I go out to a function, maybe approached once and some “hints” from others but never anything blunt/direct unless they’re drunk or something.
If I’m not being as social and extroverted, like around Covid period, the number of girls in my life drops quite a bit which led me to believe I was below average if anything at that time. Putting yourself out there will always work in your favour.
Whenever I work somewhere new, there’s typically about one or two that seem like they could share some interest, but it will almost always come down to the guy making the first move to further any kind of connection beyond that.
Lastly, even being someone who’d consider himself attractive with moderate social media presence, I can’t think of more than a small handful of times in my life that I’ve been hit up first by a girl that I didn’t know. Online is completely their territory haha
Every night or morning I wake up for work my wife is in the kitchen making my coffee looking all sexy with a big smile. Then I remember I won’t be home for 26hrs so there’s nothing I can do about it 😑
They don’t approach me like you think. Women don’t approach how men approach, or at least are expected to approach.
Unless a guy was handsome, famous, and rich like a celebrity or lives lavishly, then yes women would approach, flock, stalk, etc…
But if you’re just a regular guy living a regular life, but have looks and a body that’s modelesque… This is how it goes.
Women are the hypocrites to watch out for when it comes to double standards and when time comes to walk the walk. To understand how women approach us, first you have to remind yourselves of Nice Guys. The type which is universally hated by all folk, men and women, young and old. All the things that women claim that nice guys do that are toxic , manipulative, exploitative, fake, people pleaser, sexually repressed, hiding intent, not showing interest and being platonic, and worst still when Ive tried and given openings and even asked directly, they will totally deny, pretend to be oblivious,and gaslight the fuck outta themselves.
That’s how women will approach me. It’s crazy.
To answer the question in some sense, physical cold approach that is intentional: 5 times so far
Being lobbed to me through friends family or acquiantences: 20 – 30 times so far
Anonymous or secret admirers: about 10 back in school
signs of interest: 10x a day average. in places with more people it would be proportionately more.
Choosing signals specifically from potential partners: 0 – 5x depends on where I am and the amount of foot traffic around me and what sort of place it is.
Covert invitations for sex: 0 – 6 depending where I am. To give context, if I’m on a 5 mile mountain hike, it would be 0 on most days and sometimes 1. If the girls come out to play, maybe 2. If I’m at the waterpark on the weekends it could easily be minimum of 2 and I remember the day 6 girls were eyeing me.
A lot indirectly. A lot of eye contact, glances, soft smiles, moving around in friend groups to get closer, hovering right next to you at the bar / concerts right in a spot you’d naturally at least talk to the person in passing, etc.
But YMMV, dudes of different physiques have reported slightly different experiences with this (intimidating vs. non intimidating external perception)
Typically, women rarely, if ever, approach men. At the most, they will make eye contact, smile, or try to “accidentally” bump into you. If they are with friends, they will just giggle and stare. Or maybe ask you a random question. In more social contexts, they will give hints that they are interested (compliments on looks or clothing), maybe engage in some flirtatious touching, or ask you personal questions (e.g., do you have a girlfriend?). Men are expected to pick up on the cues and ask her out.
I’m old and fat now, but in my 20s I was hot shit. 6ft, blond hair, blue eyes, barrel chested, wide shouldered with a jawline that could cut steel.. fresh from the Marines and in that kind of shape.
I would get hit on by women everywhere. Most of the time it would be fairly subtle, awkward attempts at small talk to create continuation of a normally brief interaction, sometimes blatant & blunt offers & solicitations.
The thing is, I wasn’t socially confident then, I was shy, anxious, and I’ve always been a relationship guy, not a hookup guy. I don’t do casual sex.
So, it was hell. I hated being attractive. I hated the attention. I hated being treated as a piece of meat. Never took advantage of any of it. And I don’t regret that, even though I’m sure some of what could’ve happened would’ve probably been very memorable.
I had a really handsome guy working for me at my business. He got 10 numbers a day from girls and from girls mothers. Women would say “here’s a picture of my daughter, she’s a cheerleader at this college, she’s very cute you’re perfect match.” He had a body like that giant Michaelangelo’s “David” statue with curly blonde hair and about 6’3″. Just what every girl wants, except he was 1000% gay and very in the closet. I didn’t even know for 3 years.
Never, I always approach. Most of the time they tell me I just look gay so they don’t think twice about approaching. My gf now, thought I was gay before we went out. I have quite a few ear piercings, a nose piercing, well groomed and I dress nice. Plus I love to smile. If y’all seen me, you’d probably think the same lol
Never outright meaning something like “hey what’s up you are hot…”. But definitely notice a change in their demeanor. They drop little hints. I’m no Clooney but if he’s a 10 I’m like an 8.2. Would be a 9 if I had better teeth. Invisalign soon.
My first two girlfriends asked me out, and it happened fairly often back when I lifeguarded. Generally it’s just women being very obvious though, “falling asleep” on my shoulder during group movie night, asking about my day, being flirtatious, etc. It helps that I have a good face, but am also 6’7” with a swimmers physique
All the (serious) relationships I have been in, women made the first move. And honestly, I always thought they were out of my league (something to do with self-esteem back then I suppose)
Although now, getting approached by women IRL probably just means a few glances, exchanging a few smiles and maybe small talk that leads to one coffee at best. Though the last part is probably once a year kind of event. The exchanging of glances and smiles is an everyday occurrence.
On dating apps, the success is fairly seasonal. Lot more around the big holidays IMO
Never. Sometimes I get thirsty stares tho. Especially the weekends from somewhat high / drunk women. I don’t like feeling like a piece of meat let me say that much.
Define attractive. I mean I’ve been called handsome and cute. But as far as I can remember, there was only one girl to show any romantic interest in me. She (one year younger than me) told her mother that she wanted to marry me. Her mother told my mom and she told me and I cringed really hard. I was like 12 yrs old and liked some other girl for years atp.
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Never, honestly
Now, never. But before I hit 50 a lot.
If you mean cold approached, 0
99,999% of women don’t cold approach, no matter how attractive the man.
If your talking about women making the first move, it’s not zero, but the actual number really depends on what you mean by that. Most of the time if a woman is interested she will signal that, but generally she won’t fully verbalise before you do, so if you mean she verbalises interest first the number is also really low.
Never
Women do approach generally they arnt socialized to.
Yeah pretty much never. Even in my prime when I was really good looking it was mostly nonexistent. Women did stare a lot and do some of their subtle little hints hoping I would pick up on them but a straight approach, I can only remember maybe three off the top of my head.
I barely went out for years as i thought i was unattractive as guy bullied me so much growing up and women seemed to almost entirely ignore me
i might be very handsome now
in about 12 outings at age 32 to bar, i got approached my at least 2 girls i wouldnt consider at all, going for a guy well out of their league.. and 2 quite decent 18 year olds… i didnt really know what to say though and they though i was rejecting them and went away probably crying
I consider myself at least slightly above average, and if being given complement is considered approached, then its happened a few times within the last year.
As far as a woman straight up saying ” hey xyz, i want your number” or some other variant, nope…never lol
I’ve been approached a handful.of times.
Not never but always the really ugly girls. But tons of hot guys 😅
Happens to me like twice a week nowadays. Not sure what is happening but it’s crazy. I’m just some dude. Earlier this week I was on a boat with my wife and my wife got up to take pictures for a moment. And the girl in front of me gave me a piece of paper with her phone number… stuff like that.
Typical approach, very rarely. Secret delusional unspoken hidden language, every day.
6 times that I can think of. 2 were fat. 2 were cougars. 2 were actually pretty hot and one of those turned out to be the best sex I’ve ever had.
It happens as often a full solar eclipse and always women 10+ years older. Cougar bate apparently 🤷
Attractive definition ? Every women has different definition of attractive.
This is a tough question to answer. Ever since I started lifting heavy at the gym and my body went from skinnyfat to toned/muscular, I get attentions from women, approached? Rarely. But this is the greatest story that I have:
It was Halloween season, I was in one of those Halloween costume stores, waiting in line for the dressing room. This very pretty woman walks by, she punches me twice (gently) on the shoulder and says “You know you are very good looking, right?” and walked away. I was flabbergasted!
She was a customer, and later on I saw her in the store, I approached her and we started to talk, she had a crop top showing a nice large tattoo on her lower back. [LOL, I know]
We left together, went to a bar, had a couple of drinks, then went to her place and fucked like horny rabbits.
So, there’s that.
That was not my life before I started lifting hard at the gym, and while I was crippled with depression and anxiety.
I’ve been cold approached once. A bit under half of the women I’ve been with made the first move though. I probably only figured out how to date thanks to that sort of thing happening to be honest
Whenever I go to a function, but never my type
Women don’t approach. That would make them look desperate 🫠
It’s a fucking nightmare.. I can’t even walk down the street without having gorgeous women throwing themselves at me.. all the neighbours wives look at me like Im a piece of prime steak and local ladies brass band, – well let’s just say Im getting bored of how they change thier flute blowing techniques and stare at me every time I walk by.. it’s like fucking band camp all over again..
😉
Rarely. If I am being out and social maybe 1x every other year will a woman with 0 ambiguity openly approach me.
Just about never. I’ve been approached once, and I’ve been riding that high ever since.
It happens occasionally. I almost said it happened more when I was younger, but now that I’m thinking about it, it still happens. The context is just different.
Random women might strike up conversations with me, and I tend to be pretty oblivious, so I’ll just kind of awkwardly make small talk and then wander away. And then later, someone would be like “Dude, that girl was totally hitting on you.” And I’m like “Really? I didn’t get that impression.”
Yes, I’m pretty dumb.
Almost all the time, but women do it in their own way – with small signs. Just small % of them are talking straight
It only ever happens at all the different jobs I’ve had. Apparently I don’t look welcoming until people get to know me lol.
The last time was years ago.
Women are gonna be too intimidated (and get butterflies) to directly approach guys they really find sexually attractive the vast majority of time, and if one does in that once and a blue moon, you probably won’t find her attractive anyway.
Never, but I see them looking, and if I ever interact with one they are always EXTRA nice and talkative lol.
Women don’t usually approach the same way that men do.
I can’t say it doesnt happen, it’s happened many times to me, but it’s few and far between.
Instead of approaching, women will “find” themselves in your space, and then will find a way to join in your conversation.
Like last week I was buying a vape from the store and when I asked the cashier for a certain flavor, the girl behind me asked if that flavor was any good and what flavors I’d suggest. We talked for a bit and ended up exchanging numbers.
She didn’t approach me and hit on me and ask for my number the way you’d think of when a dude approaches a girl. She instead found a way to strike up conversation with me, and let me lead the rest of the way.
I’m above average looking, it happens here and there. If I approach tho I’m rarely turned down.
I have a friend that looks like a damn GQ model tho and he gets handed at least 5 numbers a day, it’s wild, we can just be walking through somewhere and women will just walk by and hand him their numbers and keep walking. 99% of the time he just throws them away lol
I dont know how attractive I’m.
In person: max I noticed was women being more touchy to me sometimes, but never got confirmation. But got many guys approaching me.
In dating apps: basically everyday I have some women liking me
It’s funny to hear guys not being cold approached.
My 5′ 7″ Tom Cruise style friend got approached all of the time. Within minutes of entering a room.
At 50, I’m nothing special… but I can tell when women my age are giving me extra attention. She might not approach me but you can tell that our interaction is going well.
Rarely and never direct. But my conversion rate was very high.
Spotlight on tinder and hinge etc being the exception
But usually just looking or brushing into you. Then half the time you talk to them and can’t tell. Then a week later their girlfriend goes “my friend was really into you, why did you walk away”…. Because I was trying hard and she was giving me nothing back
I am Gen X and as a teenager it was pretty constant, once I hit my 20’s that kind of attention evaporated. I have not been directly propositioned by a women I didn’t already break the ice with since I was like 17.
That said I got married in December last year and since then I have had a bunch of women chatting me up in supermarkets and out in public.
Gay dudes have been far more interested in me throughout my life than straight women.
I say never. My wife says all the time.
If I’m being pretty actively social and going out in public and visible, maybe twice a year or so?
Never. I’ve had women I’ve already known confess their feelings for me, but it was still my responsibility to talk to them first, ask them out, do the work to maintain the relationship, etc.
I’ve never been asked out and have never been flirted with except by friends who were comfortable enough around me to joke/ “play flirt.” Or if I have it’s never been in a form I can recognize. Honestly it gets old, even when you’re told you’re attractive you don’t feel like you’re ever really wanted.
I have one girl being very flirty with me presently.
Only time I was ever approached was shortly after working on improving my appearance and social skills. She was 22, I was 30.
Still can’t believe it happened.
If I go out to a function, maybe approached once and some “hints” from others but never anything blunt/direct unless they’re drunk or something.
If I’m not being as social and extroverted, like around Covid period, the number of girls in my life drops quite a bit which led me to believe I was below average if anything at that time. Putting yourself out there will always work in your favour.
Whenever I work somewhere new, there’s typically about one or two that seem like they could share some interest, but it will almost always come down to the guy making the first move to further any kind of connection beyond that.
Lastly, even being someone who’d consider himself attractive with moderate social media presence, I can’t think of more than a small handful of times in my life that I’ve been hit up first by a girl that I didn’t know. Online is completely their territory haha
Every night or morning I wake up for work my wife is in the kitchen making my coffee looking all sexy with a big smile. Then I remember I won’t be home for 26hrs so there’s nothing I can do about it 😑
They don’t approach me like you think. Women don’t approach how men approach, or at least are expected to approach.
Unless a guy was handsome, famous, and rich like a celebrity or lives lavishly, then yes women would approach, flock, stalk, etc…
But if you’re just a regular guy living a regular life, but have looks and a body that’s modelesque… This is how it goes.
Women are the hypocrites to watch out for when it comes to double standards and when time comes to walk the walk. To understand how women approach us, first you have to remind yourselves of Nice Guys. The type which is universally hated by all folk, men and women, young and old. All the things that women claim that nice guys do that are toxic , manipulative, exploitative, fake, people pleaser, sexually repressed, hiding intent, not showing interest and being platonic, and worst still when Ive tried and given openings and even asked directly, they will totally deny, pretend to be oblivious,and gaslight the fuck outta themselves.
That’s how women will approach me. It’s crazy.
To answer the question in some sense, physical cold approach that is intentional: 5 times so far
Being lobbed to me through friends family or acquiantences: 20 – 30 times so far
Anonymous or secret admirers: about 10 back in school
signs of interest: 10x a day average. in places with more people it would be proportionately more.
Choosing signals specifically from potential partners: 0 – 5x depends on where I am and the amount of foot traffic around me and what sort of place it is.
Covert invitations for sex: 0 – 6 depending where I am. To give context, if I’m on a 5 mile mountain hike, it would be 0 on most days and sometimes 1. If the girls come out to play, maybe 2. If I’m at the waterpark on the weekends it could easily be minimum of 2 and I remember the day 6 girls were eyeing me.
Rarely directly
A lot indirectly. A lot of eye contact, glances, soft smiles, moving around in friend groups to get closer, hovering right next to you at the bar / concerts right in a spot you’d naturally at least talk to the person in passing, etc.
But YMMV, dudes of different physiques have reported slightly different experiences with this (intimidating vs. non intimidating external perception)
Typically, women rarely, if ever, approach men. At the most, they will make eye contact, smile, or try to “accidentally” bump into you. If they are with friends, they will just giggle and stare. Or maybe ask you a random question. In more social contexts, they will give hints that they are interested (compliments on looks or clothing), maybe engage in some flirtatious touching, or ask you personal questions (e.g., do you have a girlfriend?). Men are expected to pick up on the cues and ask her out.
I’m old and fat now, but in my 20s I was hot shit. 6ft, blond hair, blue eyes, barrel chested, wide shouldered with a jawline that could cut steel.. fresh from the Marines and in that kind of shape.
I would get hit on by women everywhere. Most of the time it would be fairly subtle, awkward attempts at small talk to create continuation of a normally brief interaction, sometimes blatant & blunt offers & solicitations.
The thing is, I wasn’t socially confident then, I was shy, anxious, and I’ve always been a relationship guy, not a hookup guy. I don’t do casual sex.
So, it was hell. I hated being attractive. I hated the attention. I hated being treated as a piece of meat. Never took advantage of any of it. And I don’t regret that, even though I’m sure some of what could’ve happened would’ve probably been very memorable.
I had a really handsome guy working for me at my business. He got 10 numbers a day from girls and from girls mothers. Women would say “here’s a picture of my daughter, she’s a cheerleader at this college, she’s very cute you’re perfect match.” He had a body like that giant Michaelangelo’s “David” statue with curly blonde hair and about 6’3″. Just what every girl wants, except he was 1000% gay and very in the closet. I didn’t even know for 3 years.
Approached as in being interested in me, never
Never, I always approach. Most of the time they tell me I just look gay so they don’t think twice about approaching. My gf now, thought I was gay before we went out. I have quite a few ear piercings, a nose piercing, well groomed and I dress nice. Plus I love to smile. If y’all seen me, you’d probably think the same lol
In person? Never. Online? Sometimes
Women don’t approach men like they way stereotypical men do. Not in Australia, if they do they’ve been drinking alcohol or taking drugs.
Depends on the social setting, in these instances this happens often and it’s more of a vibey, causal interaction.
Key thing is to vibe with her friends better than her, if you are keen on a one night stand.
But on a day to day basis women linger, walk close to you or side-eye as you walk past.
They want to be seen by men they want and be approached by them.
is there a number below zero?
I’m by no means an “attractive” man, but in my 36 years I’ve been approached by women exactly 6 times
Never outright meaning something like “hey what’s up you are hot…”. But definitely notice a change in their demeanor. They drop little hints. I’m no Clooney but if he’s a 10 I’m like an 8.2. Would be a 9 if I had better teeth. Invisalign soon.
My first two girlfriends asked me out, and it happened fairly often back when I lifeguarded. Generally it’s just women being very obvious though, “falling asleep” on my shoulder during group movie night, asking about my day, being flirtatious, etc. It helps that I have a good face, but am also 6’7” with a swimmers physique
Once or twice a year. I blame the wedding ring effect.
Only by very drunk women.
Never
All the (serious) relationships I have been in, women made the first move. And honestly, I always thought they were out of my league (something to do with self-esteem back then I suppose)
Although now, getting approached by women IRL probably just means a few glances, exchanging a few smiles and maybe small talk that leads to one coffee at best. Though the last part is probably once a year kind of event. The exchanging of glances and smiles is an everyday occurrence.
On dating apps, the success is fairly seasonal. Lot more around the big holidays IMO
Never. Sometimes I get thirsty stares tho. Especially the weekends from somewhat high / drunk women. I don’t like feeling like a piece of meat let me say that much.
I get approached about once a week or every two weeks when I go out during the summer
Define attractive. I mean I’ve been called handsome and cute. But as far as I can remember, there was only one girl to show any romantic interest in me. She (one year younger than me) told her mother that she wanted to marry me. Her mother told my mom and she told me and I cringed really hard. I was like 12 yrs old and liked some other girl for years atp.